I Choose My Life
by Xx-Twisted.Ever.After-xX
Summary: Sasori lost his partner, only to gain a new one to raise. Slowly they start to bond. But what happens when this seemingly innocent blonde boy's past starts to catch up with him, secrets are revealed and trust and love are put on the line? SasoDei Yaoi.
1. Chapter 1

_**Alright, so, this is my first ever SasoDei fic that I'm posting up here, and I'm new to this whole process, not to mention writing, so, be kind to me please '' WARNINGS: SasoDei, Yaoi and Lemon in future chapters, cursing. Don't like, don't read, please enjoy! All Characters are the Property of Masashi Kishimoto and not me, otherwise, Naruto would be a strict Yaoi series and Suckura Whoreno would be dead. :3 Summaries suck, just have a read. :3**_

**FULL SUMMARY: **Orochimaru has left Akatsuki, and Sasori is now left without a partner. Anxiously awaiting his next partner, Konan and Pein return with a small child as his partner. Left to raise the blonde, they slowly start to bond. But what happens when this seemingly innocent blonde boy's past starts to catch up with him, secrets are revealed and friendship, trust and love is put on the line. "He's always wearing that smile of his... It's creepy... As if the murder never happened..." "He has no sanity left,a psychotic murderer with a gift and an eye for beauty." "But... Why? Why is this all happening?" "Because my art... Is a Bang, un."

* * *

_**Chapter One**_

Stupid missions. Sasori was already over them, over his old partner, and especially over Akatsuki. It became even more irritating when he heard that Itachi Uchiha, bastard of a teenager, had cut off his partner's hand, and made said coward flee Akatsuki.

Not that Sasori cared much about his old partner, Orochimaru, no, it wasn't that. It was the fact of what happened next. Or to be in correct tense, what was happening at the current time. Konan and Pein had left the base to find him a new partner. That was what he was dreading. He felt pretty pissed that he was taking orders from someone who looked like they were just getting into their twenties, but hey, he looked like he was in his twenties too.

And he was technically just entering forties. But due to his Jutsu he'd created, he'd become a puppet himself, and frankly, couldn't be happier.

"Hey, Sasori, how's the search going?"

Said red head looked up, muddy brown eyes looking up bored and annoyed into the eyes of Kisame Hoshigake. With a sigh, he looked back down, leaning back in his chair. "I wouldn't have a clue," was his simple reply. Kisame gave a chuckle and sat in a chair beside him, looking up at the lounge ceiling, plain grey cement and rock. "Wouldn't be too bad, I dreaded finding out who my partner would be, and I couldn't be happier with Itachi-San," Kisame said with a grin, showing off his sparkling sharp teeth.

With a scowl, Sasori looked down, staring at the joints at his fingers. "You got stuck with a little snobby brat who got rid of _my_ partner," Sasori muttered as Kisame grinned, chuckling and pat Sasori on the back. "Don't take it so harshly, Orochimaru was a bad character anyway, it's good that Itachi-San got rid of him, one less nuisance here, eh? No more finding old shed snake skins on our lounge, right?" Kisame said with a grin, "Besides, I heard you two didn't get along on missions."

Rolling his eyes, Sasori stood, he wasn't enjoying this conversation; it was making him unnecessarily uneasy.

Konan and Pein had left nearly a whole week ago, and the day before they'd gotten a paper crane flying in, Konan's handiwork, stating they'd return within a day. No news on his new partner. "Who do you reckon they'll bring back, eh?" Sasori looked down at Kisame, shrugging. "Someone with power, I suppose. Someone with potential as well, wouldn't do to have someone weak in the organisation," Sasori spoke back.

Kisame laughed. "Obviously, I mean, what type do you think?" "What do you mean 'What type'?" "I mean, well... Kakuzu's nearly 234 years old, Hidan's topped his 21st just a month ago, Itachi-San is going onto 14 in three months; what type of person do you think they're bringing back for you?"

Sasori shrugged. "I don't care, either way, they're all going to die, doesn't matter if they're a hundred or three, so long as they do their job right." _"Although I work fine alone and without a partner."_ Although, these last thoughts remained unsaid. "What an optimistic view Sasori... 'They're all going to die'. Positive attitude," Kisame said with a grin.

Crossing his arms, Sasori stared down unemotionally at the blue shark man. "You watch your mouth or you'll become a fine new addition to my puppet collection, okay?" Sasori said in a smooth, dark tone. Holding his hands up, Kisame gave a nod and a chuckle. "Alright, my bad, my bad. I'm curious about your new partner too, okay? Hidan and I just finished discussing who we reckon it might be." "And how would you know?" "Hidan went through Pein-Sama's office and found S Rank Criminal files." "Isn't that what you'd call suicidal?" "Hidan's immortal, he'd have the guts to do anything." "Ha."

"OI! FUCKERS!" Like on cue, the silver haired preacher burst into the room, panting, red-violet eyes flashing in mockery. "Sasori, Konan and Pein are fuckin' back, and you'd NEVER guess who they got for a fucking partner!" The man practically yelled as he sprinted out of the door again.

Kisame instantly stood. Had Hidan reacted this way, obviously Sasori had just scored an amazing partner. The red head, curious too, turned, following Kisame and Hidan, only a lot slower, he could hear soft voices.

"You're kidding right! Sasori gets--" "Aw come on, he has amazing potential with Sasori." "Yeah, but, look at him! Sasori will flip!"

Frowning, Sasori was concerned. Was his partner that amazing? Ha. He doubted it... But... Still... Couldn't hurt to have your hopes up... Right?

Entering the room, they saw a small group bunched around who he could only assume was Konan and Pein. Kisame was looking down and grinning. Okay, so the person was shorter than Kisame, good, he wouldn't stand for a tall person. But Itachi, who was lightly clinging to the base of Kisame's shirt, was looking up, slightly on tip-toes. Okay, so his new partner wasn't too short. About a good height, especially cause Hidan was looking slightly down, and that meant the new partner would be, about, Sasori's shoulder level.

Perfect.

The crowd became silent when they all looked up to see Sasori standing in the hallway, silent. Raising his eyebrows lightly, he watched as a small smirk appeared on Kisame's face, while Hidan was very clearly trying not to break out into laughter. What was so god-damned funny!?

"Sasori... We have your new partner here," Konan's soft, smooth, liquid-like voice drifted through the hall. "And mate, she's fucking gorgeous!" Hidan teased as Kisame smirked more. "Boy." "Fuckin' what?" "Sasori's partner is a boy," Konan corrected, still hidden by the miniature group surrounding her.

Oh joy. His new partner was a Tranny. Great.

This thought carried along a slew of hysterical laughter from both Kisame and Hidan. Bastards. Sasori gave a frown, looking at them. "You know Sasori, when we were talking just before; I hope you meant what you said! Any age, eh?" Kisame said with a smirk. What? What the hell was he talking about?? Stepping aside, it revealed Konan and Pein, and not just those two.

Sasori's eyes widened in shock, and slight horror.

In Konan's arms was a small blonde haired boy-- although to him it was slightly questionable--, cuddling up to her, undeniably asleep, wrapped in--slightly bloodied-- white blankets, definitely not over the age of five at most.

"Sasori, meet your new partner... Deidara..."

* * *

**Ah! Chapter One is up! Thank you for reading this much! More will happen soon. Please Review and help me improve my writing skills, but try and restrain yourselves from sendingflames. Feel free to, it amuses me that a person would read a thousand words and then have nothing better to do than to insult them. See the little button in the top right hand corner of the screen? The little red 'X'? If you're about to submit a flame, please click that or hit "Ctrl" + "W" :3 To everyone else, hope to see you next chapter!**


	2. Chapter 2

_**

* * *

**_

Alright, Chapter Two! I'm going to try and upload one chapter per fortnight, just so I have time to write more. Now for the warnings: SasoDei, Yaoi and Lemon in future chapters, cursing. Don't like, don't read, please enjoy! All Characters are the Property of Masashi Kishimoto and not me to much sadness.

_**

* * *

**_

_**Chapter Two**_

In his whole Akatsuki career, Sasori had followed orders immediately and without question. He never spoke out, never rebelled, and never screamed at his Leader's face that he wasn't a god and comparing him to some sacrificial crazed religion. He'd never stormed into his Leader's office, demanding payment otherwise he'd stop feeding the group. He never ran around PMS-ing and bitching about how he was the only of his gender in the hideout.

He certainly never half destroyed the hideout moving colossal weapons around and gouging half the ceiling and door frames with it. He never threatened to eat his Leader if food wasn't supplied because other members refused to get food from lack of payment. He didn't run around, high off air demanding that 'He was a Good Boy' and driving every member off the hook. And heck he could hold a decent conversation and give more than small grunts or stares as a reply that only his partner could interpret.

But this... Seeing his partner... A child... In one of his Leader's arms... This was the one time Sasori broke and went against his Leader's orders.

"Pein-Sama... He's a child," Sasori began smoothly, staring, rather angrily, at the small sleeping blonde. "He's got a powerful Kekkei Genkai, not to mention we got him while he was young, so we can raise him to our liking," Konan spoke. Apparently Pein was starting to have slight second regrets, especially when he heard a loud squeal from the other end of the hallway. "OH MY GOSH!! HE IS SOOO CUTE!!"

That boy could be heard coming a mile away.

Konan smiled at Tobi who was leaning over Itachi, staring-- or what would be assumed as staring-- at the small bundle. "Is this Sasori-Sama's new partner?? Aww He's sooo cute!!" Tobi cooed as Konan's lips twisted into a soft smile. God, that was creepy in itself...

Frustrated his points weren't getting across, Sasori groaned, rubbing the bridge of his nose with his index finger and thumb. "Look! I am _not _having some little brat as my partner, I think it was a borderline for Itachi to come in, but only because his whole family is dead, but this... This... Baby! This _brat_ is someone you happened to find and feel like raising here! What if he doesn't live up to expectations!? What if he leaves Akatsuki and leaks important secrets!?" _"This is all because of some unresolved sexual frustration between you two, isn't it?"_ Thankfully, he knew what should, and shouldn't be said to Konan and Pein.

At this particular moment, Pein decided to step in. "You will do as I say Sasori, whether your partner be just born or Kakuzu's grandfather, age is not a factor," Pein spoke in a death-grip voice. "Deidara will grow up to become a powerful Shinobi or we will have him executed." At this Tobi gave a soft whine of sadness and Konan drew the tiny blonde in her arms closer to herself protectively, but her face never changed throughout Pein's speech. Emotionless.

This was becoming hard for Sasori to remain, emotionless.

"And he will not ever leak information, otherwise he will be executed. Now do you understand Sasori? He is your partner until further notice."

Staring at the boy one final time, Sasori scowled before turning and moving swiftly back down the hall. He had to go to his room to vent, build a puppet, or.. Or... Gah! Just get _away _from that little child!

As Sasori threw open his door, Pein let a small smirk cross his lips.

"Deidara likes art too."

Even at the small, tiny hesitance before the door was slammed, Pein knew he'd gotten to Sasori.

* * *

It was almost a full day later, and Sasori still refused to come out of his room. Ha. Be damned if he would calm down so easily after a mere twenty four hours. Thinking about that boy made his blood boil. How could such a kid have powers to match ones like his own!?

Ha. He couldn't.

Fuming he started to carefully sand a puppets right arm, watching the wood with a sharp eye, hands making precise movements. Although the knock on the door was a small surprise, he couldn't say he didn't see it coming.

"Come in," he called softly, still slightly irritated, especially when he heard _who _it was. Damn Konan. "This is Sasori's room... Sasori's your new partner... Dei, say hi." "H-Hi Sasori, un..."

Sasori froze in his work. The kid was awake? Turning in his chair, he froze, looking down at the small blonde whose hair was up in a half ponytail, fringe covering half his face, one bright azure blue eye looking up shyly at Sasori, a faint red blush dusting his cheeks, one hand holding Konan's, the other clinging to her dress. Even Sasori had to admit, the little brat looked cute, like nearly every little kid did. He seemed quiet too.

He was starting to accept it. A quiet, artistic kid... Hnn... Maybe this wouldn't be so bad then.

Muddy brown eyes left the small body and looked up at Konan, giving her a small, if not slightly false, smile. "Konan, may I take a moment to speak to my partner please?" he asked smoothly as she smiled and nodded, kneeling down. "Now be nice for Sasori, be on your best behaviour, okay?" she said as she gently poked Deidara's nose and stood up, swiftly leaving the room, leaving Deidara standing alone, fighting nerves and fear as he looked up at the taller, older red head.

"Come here, no need to be shy Deidara," Sasori said softly, gesturing for Deidara to come closer, smiling. The blonde obediently moved forward, pausing a few small steps in front of Sasori's chair. Sasori knew he had to put the blonde in place now before he grew older and disobedient. However cruel he had to be.

Studying the blonde figure, he took in a deep breath. He was completely covered in clothing, wearing a turtleneck that had sleeves covering over his wrists, long pants and even cute little socks, all in a soft blue colour. Blue suited him. But what mainly caught his eye was some of the bruising across his cheek and bandages covering his hands and some that covered parts of his face, along with a bloodied eye patch that could barely be seen underneath his blonde fringe.

He could ask Konan about that later, though. He had something more important to do at the moment.

"Deidara. As your partner, and elder, I demand respect. You follow me, follow my rules, and never disobey. Do you understand?" "Yes, un." "Furthermore, if you do disobey, you'll regret it. Do you understand?" "Yes, un." "You will call me your Danna, or Master, and follow me blindly and without question. Do you understand?" "Yes, un." "Yes _what_?" "I-I mean, yes D-Danna, un."

Sasori frowned. This kid was a pushover; he could bully him into anything he wanted.

"And stop saying 'Un', it's annoying." "I can't, un." Sasori froze. Well, well, the boy _did _have some fight in him, wasn't a complete pushover. "Why not?" Deidara began fidgeting, wringing the ends of his shirt nervously, stepping from foot to foot, small hands trembling. "Answer me Deidara!" Sasori scolded in a more demanding tone, but what came next was really unexpected.

"I'M SORRY! I'M SORRY, UN! PLEASE! DON'T HURT ME! I'M SORRY! I'LL BE GOOD, UN! BUT PLEASE, DON'T HURT ME!" Sasori sat still, shocked the boy had collapsed and was crying heavily. He stood up, frowning in slight concern and moved forward, placing his hand on Deidara's shoulder, feeling the boy tense up and scream in agony, causing him to withdraw his hand. The door flew open and Konan ran in, carefully picking the blonde up and holding him closely. "Sasori, he's not old enough to control pain, be gentle with him! What'd you do?" "Nothing, he just freaked out on his own." "Bullshit! ZETSU!"

Zetsu, half plant, half man, his body half black and half white with a large Venus flytrap growing from his neck and shoulders, was Akatsuki's 'Doctor'. Or the closest thing they had to one. Within a minute, Zetsu had arrived, calm but obviously annoyed. "Sasori hurt him, didn't he? Poor thing. **Bastard little kid, I'm not gonna sleep cause of the brat!" **Zetsu spoke.

Sasori watched, helpless as Zetsu sat Deidara down on his bed, much to Sasori's displeasure, and carefully removed the shirt. Sasori had to force himself to keep a straight, uncaring face, but it was hard to. Deidara was covered in bloodied bandages, and he now understood why he was so covered with the clothing, and also understood why he was in such pain. Gently placing his hands above the wounded area, Zetsu started a very faint flow of chakra against the wounds while Konan whispered soothing words to Deidara who was still crying softly.

"Why don't you increase the chakra, he'll heal faster." "Sure, if you're willing to make him sick. Children aren't used to such strong chakra flows as ours, that'd damage him internally! Besides, he's in your care, he's staying in your room, so you can do with him whatever you want, just keep him alive and healthy," Konan rebutted. Sasori stopped, staring at Konan, dumbfounded. This kid... He was to be looked after... And raised... By Sasori? "Don't act so surprised, Kisame is watching over Itachi and Kakuzu in turn had to look after Hidan, your turn to look after your partner," Konan spoke with a slight clip to her voice.

The Puppet Master could only scowl to himself, disapproving. "I-I'm sorry Sasori no Danna, un..." Sasori was snapped from his thoughts, looking up at Deidara, tears still running down the boy's pale cheeks. With a sigh, the childish appearance overcame the red head; he couldn't win when Deidara gave him such childish, innocent looks.

"Just get yourself fixed up and then I'll go get you something to eat." "Yes, un!"

* * *

Had Sasori known about kids _prior _to half-adopting Deidara, he wouldn't have, to put it simply. He'd managed to break down the shy kid's barriers and get him to speak, because before, it had just been creepy at how _silent _the kid was. He was afraid he'd gotten another Itachi...

* * *

_Flashback_

"_Deidara, are you hungry?"_

"_... Un."_

"_What do you want to eat?"_

"_..."_

"_..."_

"_..."_

"_Well?"_

"_I-I'm sorry Danna, I dunno, un."_

"_What do you like?"_

"_..."_

* * *

Oh how he'd wanted to just force words to come from the pale boys lips. It had seemed like Deidara would barely utter a word. But then, Kisame had come along and played a few games with him, heck, he'd gotten Deidara laughing and clapping his hands happily. And now, Sasori was trying to shut the kid up again.

"Sasori no Danna, un?"

Here it comes.

"What is it brat?"

"I was wondering what you were doin', un!"

With a heavy sigh, Sasori placed down his wood scalpel and turned in his seat to look down at Deidara who was hugging a small plush bear close to his chest, smiling happily up at Sasori. Damn brat. "I'm working on my puppets, go play with Kisame," Sasori instructed, turning back to his puppet and started to carefully sculpt out the eye of the puppet. "Unn... I would... But Kisame-Sama is busy, un."

His knife nearly slipped. Busy? At a time like this? "What about Tobi? Go play with Tobi." "I would, un, but Tobi-San's gonna leave for a mission soon." Damn. That meant Zetsu was gone too. "Itachi? Go see Itachi." "Itachi-Sama's with Kisame-Sama." God damn those two. "Konan, go visit Konan, she loves playing with you." Ha, so true, let's see what Deidara came up with instead! "Konan-Nee-Chan is in Pein-Sama's office, un... I think she's being hurt." "Why do you think that?" "She's making funny noises, un."

This time Sasori's knife _did _slip and it sliced a deep scrape along the puppets wooden face. Well, the sexual tension was being resolved, at least.

With another heavy sigh he turned back to the innocent blue eyed boy. "Fine, how about _I _take you outside?" "Yay! Thank you Danna, un!"

No working on puppets at the moment, this one was ruined. He disliked Deidara to a small extent, but he wasn't foolish enough to try and give Deidara to the money bastard or preacher. Hidan would probably sacrifice him to that creepy Jashin God and Kakuzu would try selling him for some loose change. Slicing a puppet's face on accident didn't mean Deidara deserved such a fate, however heartless Sasori was trying to make himself. But still, seeing Deidara jumping up and down happily, bear dropped casually on the floor as his little hands grabbed Sasori's pants, tugging playfully, Sasori only grew more irritated. Orochimaru never did that.

Little _Brat_.

* * *

"What's the matter Sasori? You look exhausted!" Muddy brown eyes turned and death glared Kisame before turning away again, leaning over and pulling the blanket up across the small body, tucking Deidara-- and the small bear he was cuddling-- in carefully to his small bed on the other side of the room as Sasori's.

"It's only been a month, but I'm already over it. I've had enough of Deidara and his childish behaviour," Sasori muttered as he leaned on the tall bars of the bed, looking down distastefully at the sleeping boy. He'd fallen asleep after playing in the field with some butterflies and chasing birds, and had chosen the comfiest place to do so. In Sasori's lap. Said red head had ended up carrying the little blonde boy home and tucking him in, just as darkness fell.

"Maa, Sasori you say that now, but trust me, you'll grow fond of Deidara." "Ha, that's doubtful." "Trust me." Sasori looked up to see the knowing smile on Kisame's face. "Kakuzu was like that towards Hidan, and now, hey, they're fucking like rabbits." "Language." "Aha!" Kisame looked like he'd achieved something, and Sasori could only raise an eyebrow in turn. "You wouldn't have cared before, why do you care now?" "I dislike hearing about co-workers 'Going at it like rabbits' as a matter of fact," Sasori spoke in a flat tone.

Kisame rolled his eyes. "Nope. You don't want Deidara picking up foul language, and if it weren't for me pointing it out, you would have told me to shut up so I wouldn't have woken Deidara up," Kisame said. Sasori said nothing. Partially because Kisame was right.

"Get out, I'm going to bed. I'm tired," he said softly turning and walking to the bed, sitting down on it with a sigh. "Fine, fine, do whatever, goodnight, and remember, you _will _grow fond of him, m'kay?"

Waving a hand dismissively, Sasori waited until Kisame had left before moving and shutting the door and locking it. Three times. Not only to keep people out, but to keep Deidara in. He knew kids could hurt themselves if let outside alone and without guard. Making sure he'd securely locked away all of his puppets, sharp tools or anything Deidara could possibly hurt himself with, he turned, getting dressed before looking at the sleeping figure, curled up to the teddy, breathing peacefully.

Moving cautiously to the mini bed, he leaned over the sides again, looking at Deidara's peaceful face and sighed. He gently ran his fingers through Deidara's hair; a small whine of appreciation passing the blonde's lips and Sasori couldn't help but smile at the adorable blush that had formed on Deidara's milky white cheeks.

"Good night Brat."

* * *

**Ah, a cute ending to the chapter! :3 Deidara's an adorable kid, I would love to have a boy just like him. And Sasori seems like he's started to warm up. :o Wow! Anyway, hope you enjoyed this chapter and are enjoying the story so far. Things will start picking up soon in action! :3 **


	3. Chapter 3

_**Whee Chapter Three is up now! I'm enjoying writing this story so far, gives me something to do when I'm not studying or drawing. Of course, I really wanted to turn this story into a Doujinshi, but I really doubt I'd have the time (or patience) to complete it. Sigh Well, thanks for reading this far, enjoy it! w WARNINGS: SasoDei, Yaoi and Lemon in future chapters, cursing. Reviews will always be loved 3**_

_**

* * *

**_

Chapter Three

"Danna, unn" Hearing the voice, Sasori lazily cracked an eye open, sitting up slowly, looking over at Deidara who was standing up in his cot-like bed, staring at Sasori with pleading, puppy-dog eyes. But it was the tear stains that caught Sasori's attention.

Reluctantly, Sasori got up, walking over to Deidara's bed, lifting him up carefully and holding him like Konan had taught him, and as gently as possible. "What is it Brat?" That was Deidara's nickname, no questions asked whether everyone else liked it or not. The only response he got to his question though was Deidara hugging Sasori around the neck, gripping him tightly, legs wrapped around the puppets chest. With a sigh, Sasori walked to his bed, sitting down with Deidara in his lap.

"Did you have another nightmare?"

"...Un..."

"Did you want to talk about it?"

"... No, un..."

It had been like this since the first night, Deidara would wake up screaming, crying or just plain trembling from nightmares he refused to tell anyone, and Sasori would hold him and _attempt_ to comfort him. Attempt was a key word, Sasori thought he was pretty terrible, but Deidara seemed to appreciate the small comfort.

Standing up, Sasori walked to the door, unlocking it and opening it with one hand, the other still holding Deidara as he left the room, shadows present under his eyes. He hadn't slept very well again. Heck, he hadn't slept well the past few weeks since the night he and Kisame had spoken silently. He still doubted he'd grow fond of Deidara, but everyone seemed so attached to him already.

And not wanting to admit it, he was starting to like the little brat too.

"Are your hands hurting again?"

"... Un..."

Another oddity that Sasori had found, every morning, the brat's hands would be numb, hurting or bleeding, and sometimes two at once. It was a bit bothersome, and he had to admit, it worried him a bit. Hell, no one he knew about had such problems so naturally he had no idea what to do about said problem. Manoeuvring through the halls, he passed doorway after doorway before reaching the only room that had shrubbery half eating the actual door. Zetsu's room. Knocking on it, he waited before the door creaked open.

"Sasori?"

"Yes."

"No sleep again?"

"No."

"Deidara's hands again?"

"Yes."

A heavy sigh passed Zetsu's lips and he held out his arms. "I'll take a look, you can go." It was like this, a routine. Sasori would drop Deidara off and go to have coffee or something strong to wake himself up. Yes, he was a puppet, but not a full puppet. It would take many, many years for him to stop needing to eat or drink or sleep. Until then, he had to live with it.

But this morning was slightly different. Instead of walking off for coffee, he found his sleeve hooked on something. Turning his head, he noticed Deidara's small hand gripping his shirt, leaning over to try and hold him, even when being held by the plant man.

"Deidara, go with Zetsu."

"Danna... Could you... Come with me... Please, un?"

Sasori had to think. If it was nearly two months ago, he would have brushed the brat off with a simple 'No' and left, but it was harder to now, oddly. Pah, stupid Kisame. Turning, he gently placed his hand on Deidara's head. "I'm going to make us some breakfast, be good for Zetsu-San, okay?" Sasori spoke. And although Deidara did indeed let go, Sasori felt a bit of remorse once he saw a saddened look in Deidara's eye.

Cringing mentally, he told himself it was for the best. _"What the hell am I thinking? Why should I be caring about him??" _Sasori thought to himself angrily, walking down the silent hallway and entering the kitchen.

"Good Morning Sasori!" "Why the fuck's it a _good _morning??"

Sasori looked up at Hidan and Konan, Itachi merely looking up and then back down. "No sleep?" Konan asked, all parties in the room ignoring Hidan's rant on why that particular greeting was "Fuck-tacular" in Hidan's phrasing. Shaking his head, Sasori started to move around the kitchen, making himself some hot coffee. Ah, relief. "I made you and Deidara breakfast, I heard him crying so I thought I'd get it ready for you two." "Thank you Konan."

Sasori was indeed relieved. Good, now all he had to worry about was getting him washed, dressed, entertained, fed at lunch, entertained, mid afternoon nap, afternoon snack, more entertainment, feeding him _again _and then bed for the both of them. Such a full schedule, and to think what would happen if he got a mission. Ugh...

"So, how's life with our little fuck toy?"

"Oh, you're done ranting?" Konan asked bluntly. "Shut the fuck up!" "What did you call Deidara?" "Eh? A fuck toy!" "Never refer to him in such a manner or I will dismember you in such a way your immortality will be rendered useless." "Temper fucking temper Sasori! I was only kidding."

Shaking his head in disbelief, Sasori sipped at his coffee, deciding to eat his meal first before Deidara came. "Has he fuckin' pleased you yet?" What? What was Hidan going on about? Looking bored, and downright irritated, Sasori raised an eyebrow and sipped some more of his coffee. "What are you talking about? That's sick to have a five year old pleasure you, what do you mistake me for?" Sasori asked calmly, slightly revolted in Hidan's words. Konan too had stunned herself into a silence, and Itachi, well, was always silent but was looking at Hidan in a manner that accused him of being a paedophile, just using his eyes.

"Haven't you fucking seen?"

"Seen what?"

"His fucking hands!"

"What about them?"

Hidan burst out laughing, looking at Sasori with an amused smirk. "You're fucking kidding me! You look after him all the time, you fucking put him to bed, even _wash _him! How the fuck do you not notice these things!?" he asked with a smirk. Now Sasori was getting irritated. "What are you talking about? Are you drunk again or something? And as a matter of fact, I don't wash him, he does it himself, I just wait for him, Zetsu changes his bandages," Sasori corrected. Hidan smirked. "I'm not fucking drunk, for once, I'm fucking sober." Hnn, Kodak moment that.

"Then what are you jabbering about? Spit it out already!"

"Deidara's hands... They've got fucking mouths on them."

* * *

Despite hearing the words spill from Hidan's mouth, and calmly walking to Zetsu's room, opening the door and asking the plant man to show him Deidara's hands, he still wasn't prepared for what had come next. When he had looked down at the small, pale hands, two mouths, yes, mouths for sure, had grinned up at him, one sticking out its tongue rudely, the other merely smirking at him, faint traces of blood from the mouths corners that Sasori could only describe as _teething_.

It had been an awkward few minutes where he merely stared at them, Zetsu had stood and held onto Deidara's wrists and Deidara had looked away, blushing heavily.

"Are you mad at me, un?"

"No."

"But you seem mad Sasori no Danna, un."

"I'm not."

It had been quite a few months later and every time Sasori looked at the hands, his shame grew. Not because of their existence, no, it was because he'd been looking after the boy and hadn't _known _until nearly two months later. More so that he understood what Hidan had been rambling on about pleasuring.

The kid had _three _mouths. Hidan, the sick bastard.

Deidara looked up nervously at the red head before looking at him continue sculpting. He knew his Danna was upset about something, but he wouldn't talk.

"It's okay if you don't like me, un."

"I know, and I don't."

His Danna had always been so blunt with him, calling him a brat, a nuisance; even stating multiple times that he didn't like the small blonde. But even so, Deidara liked him and wished his Master would like him back. Gently tugging on Sasori's pants, Sasori looked down.

"What is it brat?"

Seeing the arms outstretched, asking to be lifted, or hugged, made Sasori soften slightly. With a heavy sigh, he put down his knife and lifted Deidara up, sitting him on his lap, which made Deidara very happy, seating himself happily and placing his hands on the edge of the desk, looking up at Hiruko, Sasori's favourite puppet next to the Third Kazekage, as Sasori continued to add improvements.

Deidara always liked watching Sasori work, made him feel happier and excited. And Sasori in turn didn't mind that his art was appreciated.

"_You'll grow fond of him, trust me." _

With a sigh, Sasori couldn't continue denying what Kisame told him. He liked Deidara. Who in the whole Akatsuki base didn't? He was adorable, polite, well behaved and on top of that artistic and theirs to raise into a powerful killer. A perfect child.

"Hey, Brat."

"Yes Danna, un?"

"... Did you... Want to work on a painting... With me?"

Deidara sat in complete shock, turning and looking up at Sasori with a stunned expression, not daring to believe he'd heard Sasori actually _ask_ him to help! And on something as important to Sasori as art too! Sasori stopped in his work, looking down at Deidara, raising an eyebrow. "Well?" Deidara's face lit up and a bright smile worked its way onto his face as he turned hugging Sasori tightly, stunning the red head, chair having rocked a bit when the boy had practically lunged at him. "Un! Un! I'd love to!" He declared happily.

Sasori grumbled something to himself along the lines of regretting asking the now hyper blonde, but soon couldn't help but smile tenderly when he heard how happy he'd made the blonde in mere seconds. Deciding now would be a good time, while the other was happy, he reached into the drawer, pulling out a small, roughly wrapped parcel, holding it out to Deidara.

Looking down at it, Deidara blinked. "Open it," Sasori instructed. Nodding, Deidara took it, opening the parcel to reveal a small piece of machinery. Blinking, Deidara looked up at Sasori, confused. "It's a scope. It'll help you see better out of your left eye," Sasori explained. And it was at that moment when he saw tears of joy running down Deidara's face and the ever-so-predictable hug that followed was when he started to regret giving Deidara two bits of good news at once... But... It was worth it.

"_You really are a brat... Deidara..."_

* * *

"_Sasori no Danna"_

_Opening his eyes, Sasori sat up slightly, looking down at his bed, feeling a slight weight on it. "Brat, what are you doing in my bed?" He asked the blonde crop of hair that was in sight, the rest of the boy hidden underneath the blanket._

"_You're so cold... How could you hurt me like this, un...?" came the soft, smooth reply. Hell, that didn't sound like Deidara at all. Frowning, Sasori leant back on his arms, looking down. "Deidara, I know you have nightmares, but you can deal with them in your bed, I don't want blood all over my clean sheets," Sasori grumbled. A low, almost seductive, chuckle came out from the sheets and the body lying beside him picked itself up, revealing long beautiful blonde locks, a dazzling azure blue eye and... An older face... It was Deidara... He knew... But..._

"_But Danna... It's much easier to simply sleep in your bed, un... More comfortable... And so much more... Pleasurable, un..." The blonde breathed, moving closer, crawling onto Sasori, seating himself on Sasori's lap, gently kissing and nipping at the red heads neck, making Sasori's eyes widen in turn._

"_Get off me brat!" Within seconds, Sasori had flipped Deidara off him, but had found himself on top of him instead, with a very pleased look in Deidara's eyes. "Oh Danna... Always so... Dominating... No wonder I want you so bad, un..." Deidara purred, reaching up and stroking Sasori's face with his fingertips, and oddly, the touch sent small shivers down Sasori's spine._

_This felt so right... But... "Deidara, you're six, you can't think of me this way, and I can't either, I'm dreaming-" "No Danna... I do think of you this way... And I know you do too, un, and if you're not dreaming now, then when you're awake, you'll face it... All... Over... Again..." No, this wasn't right; Sasori felt so awkward, thinking, no, _dreaming _of his young partner in such a way! _

_Filthy!_

"_Don't fight it... Love me, un..."_

_Sasori gasped as Deidara's hands slipped down, low, trailing down into his pants, the palm mouths starting to lick and suck at his lower region, causing a soft moan to pass his lips. "Danna... Do you like it, un?"_

_Sasori could barely get any words out, merely letting his forehead rest against Deidara's strong elegant shoulder, taking in deep breathes. Feeling Deidara shift under him he gave another soft groan when he felt Deidara grinding himself down on Sasori's thigh, hearing a soft, breathy moan in return. "O-Oh Danna... Unn... Please... T-Take me, unn... I need you so bad... Danna... Unnn... Danna..."_

"DANNA!"

Sasori jolted awake, sitting up, panting, some sweat running down his face. Sitting still for a few moments he stared at the wall. "Danna... Are you okay, un?"

It was morning, it had to be, sun was pouring into the room, the smell of breakfast was wafting underneath the doorway, Deidara was awake... Shit... Deidara was _awake_... Looking at the blonde, his muddy brown eyes met with Deidara's concerned blue orb, tear stains across his cheeks. Nodding, Sasori stood, using the blankets to conceal himself as he walked to the boy; not hot, sexually appealing, six_teen_ year old Deidara, but a cute, little, six year old Deidara.

Lifting Deidara out of the bed, he held him, walking to the door slowly. "Come on Brat, breakfast, I'm okay." Sasori said softly as he unlocked the door, walking down the hallway. Nodding, Deidara looked down before resting his head on Sasori's shoulder. He didn't believe that, something was up, and he'd find out. He was worried, especially after hearing what Sasori had been moaning out.

"_...Deidara..."_

* * *

**Hnn, Sasori's dreaming about Deidara? And the little blonde heard him! :o Imagine waking up and hearing your master moaning your name... And at that age, how awkward. But the boy's too innocent to understand it all, so, he should be okay! :3 I had the funniest thought after I wrote the end of this chapter when Deidara looked down at Sasori and noticed something was 'Up'. I didn't think of it in a perverse way until I uploaded it and re-read it, then just kind of laughed. But I didn't want to change it, so I just left it. Poor Saso-kun will be embarrassed though, lucky Deidara didn't say anythign about it XD Until next chapter!**


	4. Chapter 4

_**Alright, so here's Chapter Four. I'm uploading the first Five Chapters in bulk because, well, I have up to Chapter Eleven Written and I don't want to leave you all on terrible cliff hangers, especially if I get lazy one day or just have to study and have no time at all to type (Noo!). But none the less, I do want to thank you if you've read this far, I know for some large stories seem daunting, but I don't think mine will go forever... **__**Anyway, I don't think I need to tell you any warnings, but you all get the gist of it, am I right? :3 Reviews are beautiful!**_

* * *

_**Chapter Four**_

"Brat... Brat! Deidara! Get up you lazy boy!"

Sasori was met with a small groan. What was with this boy, you let him sleep in once, and he spends the rest of his life sleeping in. Well, not his whole life, but his life so far in Akatsuki. Okay not even that, he was exaggerating now. Tobi poked his head in through the door, a small party hat on his head. "Sasori-Sama! Is Dei-kun awake yet?"

Sasori looked up irritably, glaring at Tobi. Idiot, he was going to spoil everything! He made a shooing motion before looking down at the blonde hair sprawled against the pillow, long and silky soft. They hadn't told Deidara, but after many, many months of searching and hunting, hell, close to a year, they'd found out lots of information on the blonde. Well, a lot compared to what they'd known before, Deidara, to them, was still a complete mystery, not talking about his past often.

Especially not about what most of the organisation thought important. His birthday. They'd only found out about a month ago that Deidara would be having his twelfth birthday that day. So they'd spent a whole month in frenzied panic, trying to conceal the plans from the boy, preparing for the one day Deidara would have a birthday surprise. Possibly part of the reason, Sasori now realised, the blonde had asked to sleep in on this day for the past few years. But what he found odder was the blonde was always rather upset on this day.

He never knew why, stubborn blonde refused to talk.

But now, the roles had been reversed, and Sasori was being the stubborn one. He had to act 'normal' and wake him up, tell him to get to breakfast and watch as he was surprised by the rest of Akatsuki.

"I said get up!"

"Mmm... But Sasori no Danna... Please, un... Lemme sleep today off..."

Rolling his eyes, Sasori leant down, taking the sheets and tore them off sharply, making cool air meet Deidara's warm body.

"AH!! FINE! FINE, UN! I'M UP! HAPPY, UN!?"

Sasori smirked. Oh yes, very happy.

Deidara had long since gotten over his nightmares enough to stop waking up screaming nearly a year and a half ago, but waking up in tears or trembling wasn't all that uncommon for him. But to see Deidara looking so upset, and on his birthday, well, it just didn't feel right for Sasori.

Resentfully, Deidara got up, slipping his feet into a pair of slippers, rubbing his eye with a fist before he looked at Sasori. Why was he still there? Standing and waiting? Normally he had gone off for his coffee, so... "Danna, un?" "Come on," Sasori instructed, turning and started to walk out of the door.

Blinking, Deidara nodded before padding after Sasori, latching onto Sasori's hand, padding along beside the red head obediently. There had been a time, years ago, when Sasori had objected whole heartedly to Deidara holding his hand, but had grown wary of the argument and simply let the persistent boy do it. Not that he hated it, it was actually quite the opposite... And of course...

Hidan and Kisame.

Two bastards, continuously poked fun at the two partners as Sasori was always seen with Deidara clinging to him, following him like a little duckling. Hidan always wondered aloud why Sasori didn't get annoyed, but Sasori merely replied with a shrug. It felt good to have someone depend on you and need you. Plus, he wouldn't admit this out loud, but Deidara padding after him, occasionally bumping into him when he stopped unexpectedly, looking at him innocently...

It was all pretty cute to Sasori.

This particular morning, Deidara was rather spaced out, staring out the windows to the side, watching the fields, lost in deep thought. This only served to help Sasori; the blonde wasn't paying attention to the shuffling sounds in the kitchen where everyone was finishing up. Stopping at the end of the hall, Sasori turned his head, only to see Deidara bump into him, blink, look up, blush, look down and mumble a quick, "I'm sorry Danna, un."

Sasori shrugged off the apology, grabbing the doorknob, twisting it and pulling the door open, gesturing for Deidara to enter. Oblivious to the occupants of the kitchen, Deidara walked in, staring at his feet, the room slightly darkened before--

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEIDARA!"

There was an explosion of cheers and some of the Akatsuki members jumped out happily, cheering and clapping, lights going on, lighting up Deidara's stunned face, eyes wide, mouth slightly open in shock. "Wh-Wha?" he stuttered as Sasori placed a hand on Deidara's shoulder. "They said Happy Birthday Brat, how could you hold back information like that against Akatsuki?" He asked in a stern tone. Blushing Deidara looked up, panicking. "I-I'm sorry Danna, I-" He was silenced by a wave of the hand from Sasori, a small chuckle and a very small smile.

"I was joking. Happy Birthday Deidara."

Staring at Sasori in slight disbelief, he couldn't help but smile widely, face lighting up in joy, excitement and youth.

Standing by the side, Sasori watched as Konan and Tobi hugged Deidara tightly, Konan having a small teary and clinging to Deidara, exclaiming how he'd grown up so fast, Tobi going on his high from air and screaming his joy out, pulling the slightly overwhelmed blonde with him through more members who wished him a happy birthday and to the cake and presents.

Soon everyone was laughing, talking, eating and drinking. Tobi was high off sugar, Hidan was totally wasted from the amount of alcohol he'd consumed and was hitting on a half drunken Kakuzu, Itachi was sitting very close to Kisame who was laughing, a deep red blush on his cheeks, he too was drunk then, while Itachi had only had a bit to drink. Konan was talking merrily to Deidara while Zetsu started to ice the cake for the twelve year old, starting to lay the candles on it.

It seemed Sasori and Pein were the only two sitting to the side, watching the loud group.

"Why not join Sasori?"

"And take my chances with a drunken Hidan? No thank you."

"Your partner's twelve, you should be happy; you won't have to baby him so much."

"I am, hopefully I can get a full night's sleep soon then."

"He'll still be sharing your room."

"Understood."

"You're going to have to start teaching him more."

"I take him outside to train nearly every day."

"I don't mean that kind of teaching."

"Sir?"

Pein turned to look at Sasori, a small smile on his face. Oh lord, that was creepy, no matter how many times it happened, it always scared the living shit out of him.

"What I mean is... He's twelve, and soon to be hormonal teenager... You're going to have to talk to him about... Certain subjects," Pein exclaimed, and then, it hit Sasori. Raising a six year old was easy, now came girlfriends, crushes, social activities, rebellion and what Sasori was dreading; The Sex Talk. Looking pleadingly at Pein, Sasori sighed. "Couldn't Konan-Sama do that?" "No. You're his partner, it's your job, Kisame did that with Itachi." _"And a bloody great job he did on that too,"_ Sasori thought, looking at the blue male who had his arm slung around Itachi's shoulder, the pale raven haired man blushing slightly.

Smirking, Pein pat Sasori's shoulder. "Send him off to the village later with Itachi, then talk to Kisame, get advice," he said before standing from the seat, moving forwards as the lights were flicked off and a cake with twelve lit candles was placed on the table and the birthday song was sung.

Sasori watched, helpless it seemed, from the sidelines. It was true, Deidara was growing up. One day, he'd end up finding a nice girl, bringing her back and giving her all the attention, leaving him alone. Again. It made him feel rather lonely and clingy.

"Danna, un! Come here!"

Snapping out of his thoughts, Sasori smiled as he saw Deidara's bright grin. That face would become famous one day. Standing as well and moving to stand beside Deidara, he bent down, face near Deidara's, not noticing the blush forming on the blonde's cheeks. "Deidara, make a wish, and then blow out the candles. Then later, we'll see if your wish can come true."

Blushing more, Deidara smiled at his Master and nodded. "Un!" he said happily. "When you're ready, you can head off into town with Itachi, okay? Buy yourself something nice," Pein said as he held out some money with one hand, the other pushing Kakuzu away while Hidan held him tightly. Laughing, Deidara nodded.

This would be his first time into town, just like his first party ever. And his first wish. He had to make it worthwhile, yes... What would he wish for the most? Gah! He felt like he was put on the spot, and the room was so silent.

Looking nervously at Sasori for help, the ginger gave a small nod, making Deidara blush more, looking down at the candles, blushing a deep red and nodding. He knew what he wanted the most in the world. Taking in a deep breath, he leant forward, blowing out all the candles at once, a cheer erupting from the group. "Yay! Great work Dei-kun! What did you wish for?" Tobi asked happily as Konan playfully slapped Tobi's shoulder. "He can't say, otherwise it won't come true!"

Smiling, Deidara nodded, "And we can't have that happening, can we, un?"

"_Especially because... My wish... Is to always be with my Sasori no Danna... Forever..."_

* * *

"Wow! This place is so big, un!" Deidara exclaimed. Itachi gave a small nod, looking around. He'd been to town many times before, but seeing as it was Deidara's first time in a village, he understood the blonde's excitement. Looking around, Deidara took time in surveying the area. He'd only ever been to the area directly around the base to train, and also go outside and play with Sasori when he'd been slightly younger.

Leading Deidara expertly through the town, Itachi pointed out, in as little words as possible, stores he believed Deidara would be interested in, also pointing out some stores other members enjoyed visiting. "Ne, Itachi-Sama, which... I mean, which store is... Sasori no Danna's favourite, un?"

Turning to look at Deidara, Itachi studied the blonde's face. He was facing away, visible eye staring at a random shop, awkward look on his face, cheeks flushed a deep red. Analysing this, Itachi became slightly more suspicious, but not in any bad way. Tapping the blonde's shoulder, when Deidara turned to look at him, he pointed to a store at the end of the road. A small Art Supplies store.

Smiling, Deidara nodded. He figured Sasori would like a place like that. But he didn't want to go there alone, not without Sasori. Instead he looked through other stores, ending up buying some sugary sweets and a nice pouch and some clay.

"Wow Itachi-Sama, this place is amazing, un!" Deidara said happily as he took another sip of his chocolate milkshake. Itachi gave a nod. "I just wish everyone would stop calling me a girl, un," Deidara mumbled, placing his elbow on the table, chin in his hand, twirling the straw around the glass, looking at the chocolate drink with slight distaste.

He wasn't about to admit Hidan's taunts were confirmed in town and he did look 'Girly'. It was only his hair...

"You're troubled."

Deidara looked up, slightly startled and blinked, smiling and laughing at Itachi, nodding. "Un, you would be too if you were accused of being the opposite gender," he said with a smile, taking another sip of the milkshake.

"Not that. You've been weird." Oh geez, what a nice way to put it Uchiha. Well, man of little words, as always. "H-Heh, what do you mean Itachi-Sama, un? I always act like this, un!" "You're lying." Deidara blinked, making eye contact with Itachi but instantly looked down. He was brave, but not foolish. If Pein became angry with him, he'd set Itachi to look into his eye and he'd see horrible things.

Sasori explained it was a mental torture technique, and Pein's way of saying to behave. But Sasori would always help, as soon as the horrible things stopped and Deidara was free to go, he'd run straight into Sasori's arms, if he could still walk that was. Thinking of the red head, Deidara was unaware that he had started to blush a little. "That look. What are you thinking about?"

Looking up at Itachi, Deidara blushed more before sighing. "Itachi, you're eighteen, un, you've got more experience... Could you... Help me, un?" Deidara asked shyly. The raven haired male raised a delicate eyebrow, nodding. "Depends." Blushing more, Deidara swallowed, licking his dry lips. "I know that I'm a guy... And... Guys are meant to like girls-" "Not always," Itachi corrected, his elbows on the table, fingers interlaced, chin on his fingers. Deidara nodded, looking down, fidgeting with the base of his black shirt, staring at his fingers. "Is... Is it wrong to... Like... Guys, un?" he asked softly.

"No."

Sighing in relief, Deidara looked up, but was still feeling rather tense. "A-And... It's not wrong... To like someone... Older... Is it, un?" Deidara continued slowly.

"No."

Deidara gave a small smile, relaxing tensed shoulders and slumping in his chair lightly. "That's good, un! Now I can relax a bit!" "Who is it?" Ah, did he say relax? Forget it; he was all tense and nervous again.

There was an awkward silence, and for the first time, Itachi was the one to break it, not the other party. "Tell me, or shall I guess?" Looking up at Itachi again, Deidara's cheeks were a deep red so that it put Sasori's hair colour to shame. Itachi looked into the blondes eyes, studying for a moment before he smiled, a small one, but it was a smile nonetheless. "You wished for him, didn't you?" Smiling himself, Deidara held a finger up to his lips. "I can't tell you, or my wish won't come true, un." "No, but you can tell him."

Blinking, Deidara stared dumbfounded at the Uchiha. Tell him? "But... He won't accept-" "How do you know? Try it." Looking down at his drink, Deidara began playing with the straw, watching the brown liquid swirl around.

"Tell him? But how do I tell him that I love him, un?" "Be yourself." Looking down at his milkshake sadly, Deidara nodded.

"_But it's harder than that... If he rejects me... My life is over, because _he_ is my life... My Danna..."_

* * *

Sasori sat, working silently. He had to make sure this was finished before Deidara got home. Itachi had been told to hold him off until late so Sasori could get a chance to finish his present. Each member had given Deidara a gift, and Sasori had only whispered in the blonde's ear to wait until later that night. He'd drunk in the gorgeous deep blush that had painted his partners cheeks, the innocent look and the small, shy nod. He could be too adorable sometimes.

It wasn't anything dirty, no, the boy was only twelve, but it was something that he knew that Deidara would love. It was to help improve his vision and so he didn't have to wear a large scope on his eye. This one was slightly smaller and went inside the eye so it could be slept with. He knew this one gave Deidara lots of pain to take it off and put it back on, and to have to do that every morning and night to sleep would be plain torture, so he'd been working, nearly a year, on this one.

And it was finally ready.

With a sigh, he slumped in his chair, holding up the small clear disk, turning it in his hand, inspecting it and-- "DEI-KUN!!" Ah, Tobi was a good alarm after all, but a startling one; Sasori had nearly dropped Deidara's present. Hearing chatter, Sasori sat in his chair, pretending to work on something, whilst holding the small lens in his hands. Within minutes he could hear the soft padding footsteps that belonged to his Deidara.

"My _Deidara? Since when was he _mine_??" _Sasori mentally scolded himself as he sat, waiting still, arguing with himself mentally before- "Sasori no Danna! I'm home, un!" Sasori couldn't help but smile at the boy's voice.

"Welcome back Deidara, did you have fun?" Sasori asked as he stood, hiding the lens in his hands as Deidara stepped forward into the room, beaming and shutting the door behind him. "I never knew the town could be so wonderful! It was so big! And there were so many people, un! I didn't know there were so many people in the world!" Deidara exclaimed happily, placing his bag and clay by his bed. Sasori smiled. Growing up yet still such a child.

"Would you like your present now or are you too sleepy from your adventure?" Sasori asked with a smile. Deidara could have melted at the smile, but shook his head quickly, blonde hair fluttering around his head. "No, no! Not too sleepy, un!" he said as he stood, trying so hard to contain himself from bouncing around. He loved receiving gifts from his Danna, but to receive one on a day like this was... Amazing.

Chuckling slightly, Sasori held out the lens, smiling. "It's an improvement to your scope, you'll be able to see further, better and won't have to take it in and out, so you can leave it in forever, or until it needs repairs," Sasori explained, watching Deidara's face escalate in joy. "Thank you so much Danna, un!!" Deidara cried out happily, bouncing up and down in joy.

Walking forward, Sasori gently pushed Deidara down onto the bed, leaning over him. "Take your scope off please," Sasori spoke softly, holding the lens. Deidara reached up, pushing back his long blonde fringe. It had always made Sasori cringe in pain at what had been done to Deidara before he'd been taken to Akatsuki, but knowing this would be the last time Deidara removed the scope made Sasori very happy.

Gripping the edges of the scope, Deidara shut his visible eye in pain, frowning as he wiggled it slightly before pulling, clenching his teeth and shuddering. It was out, but it had dried blood stains on the edges. Deidara was a modest person, and he liked his flawless body, but it was only flawless because of the multiple times he'd gone into a 'Surgery' and Zetsu had corrected flaws and wounds, but the left side of his face Sasori knew Deidara felt ashamed and embarrassed to show it.

He was pale in skin tone, but the deep blood red, almost purple-black scar that slashed through his eye was the most visible feature when shown, his eye deeply slashed, the once beautiful blue mingling with red where it had been damaged and where blood vessels had been broken. Zetsu was working slowly on fixing the scar, but Deidara had to reach a certain age before such strong chakra could be used on a delicate area as his head.

But according to his card he'd received, that day would be soon.

Sasori leant down, gently touching Deidara's usually hidden cheek, thumb gently brushing over the scar, looking into Deidara's eyes. "Have you heard of contact lenses Deidara?" Sasori asked as he gently placed his thumb against the bottom of Deidara's eyelid, pulling it down gently. "Yeah, un," Deidara muttered, looking up at Sasori nervously. "This is put on just like that, do you think you can manage it on your own or would you like me to do it for you?" "C-Could you do it Danna, I'm a bit scared I'll hurt myself, un."

Nodding, Sasori bent down, moving his hand and placing the lens on the bottom of Deidara's eye, instructing him to look up. Carefully he made sure the lens was sitting right before feeling a hand grip his own. Blinking he looked down, seeing Deidara's hand gripping his own tightly. Was he hurting him? Gently he moved his hand away, letting Deidara know to look down and blink. The blonde did so, frowning a bit and blinking a few times before looking up at Sasori who was, well, speechless.

Amazing, as soon as the final surgery was done, he'd see what Deidara looked like before the village had gotten to him. His eye seemed perfect, no red showing through, no damage shown, just an exact resemblance of his right eye. Stunning.

"Does it feel alright Deidara?"

Nodding Deidara smiled, a tear rolling down his cheek. Sasori blinked, stunned. What was wrong? Crap. He'd hurt him, hadn't he?

"Deidara? What's-" "Thank you Danna... So much, un.." Sasori was stunned, especially when he felt himself tugged down slightly into a tight hug, Deidara's head buried in his neck. Blinking, he looked down, blushing lightly himself before wrapping his arms around Deidara's slim waist.

"It's okay... Happy Birthday Deidara..."

* * *

"A mission." The room was silent and solemn, everyone looking down. All members of Akatsuki were present, all but the one they were talking about. "He's too young, he can't," Konan spoke softly. Pein shook his head. "He's going to grow up some time, and we didn't bring him here to raise a baby, we brought him here to raise a killer," Pein spoke. "The fucker's not ready yet, he fucking fainted when he saw my ritual, he can't handle the blood," Hidan said, chin in hand, looking sceptically at his leader. "He'll deal with it," Pein said solemnly.

Sasori didn't like this, keeping silent he stared at his hands. "We can't have Sasori going alone on simple missions, and this is the perfect one to start the boy off," Pein continued. "But an assassination's a bit much to start him off with," Kisame said softly. Pein slammed his hands down onto the circular table they were all sitting around. "I said he's going off on a mission and that's final, he's come of age, it's time you lot stopped babying him!" Pein growled before turning to Sasori who was staring down, head downcast. "Any further objections?" Pein growled before turning, rounding on the red head. "Sasori?"

The red head looked up, face unemotional, but eyes betraying his true feelings, worry, sadness, guilt and a small hint of fear. But not for himself.

"Understood, I'll have Deidara ready to leave on our mission tomorrow morning."

* * *

**_I felt bad when writing this chapter towardsat theend. Ah, poor Deidara, a nice happy home and all of a sudden he's brought into the shock reality of being an S Class Criminal. How will he react? How will Sasori act on his first mission with his partner since Orochimaru? Is there perhaps some feelings brewing that may stop him from acting normally on a mission? And above all, WHY AM I ASKING THESE POINTLESS QUESTIONS!? You'll find out soon... Until then, later!_**


	5. Chapter 5

_**Alright. I take back what I said last chapter, this Chapter made me feel worse, I got really sad for them T.T (Then why'd you write it silly girl??) Anyway, hope you do enjoy it, however sad it may be. I can be so Sadistic a times (That's creepy...). Anyway, Read and Review please and enjoy reading! Next chapter will hopefully be up within a week or so, depends how fast I type. Also, warnings of slight OOCness in this Chapter, slight, but hey, it's a Fanfiction, they can act slightly out of Character if they wanted to...**_

* * *

_**Chapter Five**_

"Keep still, you'll attract attention." "I'm sorry Danna, un." Darkness had fallen, and the enemy was all going to sleep slowly, guards lighting lamps and starting to assemble at their look out posts. Sasori was inside Hiruko, chakra strings attached cautiously to traps laid around the area. Looking around he gave a nod and he and Deidara darted forward.

The young blonde had been briefed on the plan so as to not overwhelm him and at first he'd seemed excited, but then it died down to nerves, and nearly ten minutes before they had to leave, Sasori had found Deidara in the bathroom, trembling, mumbling fearful words to himself whilst trying to calm himself down, and this had made Sasori deeply upset. He knew Deidara wasn't ready, he couldn't do it, not now.

Entering the grounds, Sasori slipped through the doorway, Deidara darting close behind. Although Deidara's Shinobi skills were good and well developed, powerful jutsu's and stealth, his heart would often betray him in battle. Whenever they practiced, the blonde would just barely stop and then shake his head and collapse, apologising over and over, weakened form hard days of training. He was strong, but he could never strike a hit, and as of such, would end up hurt and exhausted with barely a hit on his Danna.

"Deidara, in here, hurry," Sasori instructed, moving Hiruko's thick body through and into a deadly silent room. "Attack when I say so, aim for his heart." "What, un!?" Sasori turned Hiruko's head to see Deidara, standing still, eyes wide in horror, pale face growing even paler in colour. "I... I have to... To kill someone, un? That's not what you told me!" "It doesn't matter what I said-" "No! It does! You said to destroy an artefact, un!" "Same thing." "No it's not! A human and an item are completely different, un!"

Sasori turned more, frowning. Now wasn't the time to bicker and argue, the victim was in the room beside them, and he couldn't chance them waking up. The darkness shadowed parts of them, hiding them, while the moon came in from the window, bathing half of their bodies, illuminating them, and Deidara's hurt face. "You lied to me Danna..." "No. I withheld a simple fact." "How is that simple?!" "Listen to me, you are to obey me, we will go in, I will trap him and you will kill him, do you understand me Brat?!"

Oh how Sasori wished deeply he could take back his harsh words and cruel tone once he saw the damage that he'd done. He hadn't called Deidara a Brat in a serious tone in the longest time, and to speak angrily to him... No... It was hurting. "Deidara..." he began softly before the blonde shook his head, turning and walking into the room silently. "I'm sorry, I don't understand Danna... I don't, un..."

Watching Deidara helplessly he followed him in, eyes downcast before there was a creak and he looked up, startled. "Deidara... GET DOWN!" he shouted. Everything seemed to go into slow motion for Sasori as Deidara turned, slightly surprised before an explosion rattled the place, Kunai and Shuriken flying from the doorway, blood, wood and metal splattering across the floor.

Swearing, Sasori moved quickly, both hands thrusting forward, chakra strings catching solder after soldier and sending them against each other, blood raining down on the floor, and then, their target came out.

"DEIDARA! KILL HIM!" Sasori shouted. After a few seconds of silence from Deidara, Sasori scowled.

What was he doing?

Why wasn't he attacking?

Turning, his own face paled at the sight. Deidara was struggling to sit, gripping a wound in his side, blood leaking from between his fingers, a petrified look on his face as he stared at the violence. Deidara felt horrible, everything was horrible, he was feeling suffocated, light, dizzy, anything but okay and in this world. He could feel himself loosing it and it was frightening.

"DEIDARA! GET UP AND KILL HIM!"

Looking up at his master's puppet, Deidara forced himself up through the pain, darting forward, identifying the man that was his first murder victim. Frowning, he knew he had to concentrate, pretend the man was someone horrible... Someone unforgivable...

Slowly, the face started to change and he halted in his footsteps, staring at the man now striding towards him, a smirk on his lips. "Yes... Come and kill me... If you can brat..."

Deidara's mouth went dry and he shook his head, taking a step back. He didn't want to be there anymore, he wanted to go back home, to Akatsuki. He was scared. The man pulled out a kunai and he ran forward, swinging and all Deidara could do was block. Every swing, every stab, every slash, all he did was block, not daring to attack back, even though he was given so many opportunities. He knew how to fight, but it all went out the window as he shuffled backwards, dodging attacks, blood running down his hip and thigh, his pants sticking to his leg.

"DEIDARA! NOW!"

There was a quick flash of red before a hot liquid exploded against Deidara's face and he was frozen, kunai in his trembling hand, held against the tip of another metal. In front of him, the man stood, impaled on Hiruko's scorpion tail, Deidara's kunai at the tip of the sharp object. The man had a shocked expression, and blood... Blood was everywhere.

Deidara's eyes widened and a scream tore its way from his throat as he collapsed, sobbing heavily.

* * *

"He failed?" Sasori nodded sadly. Pein's eyes widened in fury as he stood, looking at the two before him. Deidara was standing, shaking terribly, clean clothes and washed, wound on his side bandaged, but still petrified. He felt so... So _filthy_.

"Sasori... Excuse us for a moment... Wait outside."

Sasori cringed, clenching his fist and turning, walking out, leaving Deidara alone with Pein. He couldn't lie to the Leader, that would only get the both of them more severely hurt. The mission had been a success, barely. Sasori had seen the blonde hesitate and he had thrust Hiruko's tail through the man's heart, killing him instantly, but the blonde having a mental freak out was unexpected. He'd had to fight off the enemy alone and move Deidara into Hiruko with him and run. He'd had to take the long way, so the mission had lasted a day longer than it should have.

Not to mention the amount of time it took to stop Deidara rambling fearfully and sobbing. Sasori had gotten worried for him. There was no way someone could fear death and blood this much... There had to be something deeper.

Sasori was snapped out of his thoughts, only by something even more unpleasant, if not horrifying to him. A loud slap, whimper and thud. "Get up!" Another sharp slap and a heavy thud combined with the movement of shoes and a heavy hit followed by another soft cry of pain. "I'm sorry, un! I didn't mean to! I'll do better next time, I promise, un! Please! Stop!" "Shut up! You're a failure, and no one fails in my organisation without some punishment! GET UP BRAT!"

Sasori stood in front of the door; face pale, dread running through his veins as he listened to Deidara getting beaten and insulted by Pein. After a few minutes it went quiet and all that could be heard was Pein's heavy, angry panting and Deidara's soft sobs. "STOP CRYING PATHETIC BRAT!" Another harsh, much louder, sound. He'd kicked him. The door clicked and it swung open, revealing Pein, holding Deidara up by the collar of his shirt. Sasori looked at the blonde, trembling, some blood running from his lip, bruises already forming on one of his cheeks. "Get him out of my sight, train him properly, and let me never hear that he didn't accomplish his mission ever again," Pein hissed before dumping Deidara forward, Sasori lunging forward and catching him, holding Deidara close to his chest.

He could feel him trembling so badly. As soon as the door was shut, Sasori lifted Deidara bridal style into his arms, walking back to their shared room. "ZETSU! COME HERE, WE NEED YOU TO HEAL DEIDARA!" Sasori shouted across the hall, kicking his own door open and moving swiftly to the bed, placing Deidara down, brushing his fringe from his face, gently wiping the tears away with the pad of his thumb.

"It'll be okay Deidara, you'll be fine, just calm down, Zetsu's on his way," Sasori soothed in a soft voice, gently stroking Deidara's cheek. Hearing the footsteps, Sasori felt relieved, but the fear and sick feeling clogged up again when he felt the trembling hand touch his own which was on Deidara's cheek.

"Danna... I'm so sorry, un..."

* * *

And so it continued, month after month, mission after mission. Deidara could never do it; he could never take a life or harm another human. After every mission would nearly fail, or actually fail, Sasori would carry Deidara back home and do the missions report where Pein would excuse Sasori and beat Deidara, adding a large collection of bruises to his body so the milk white skin started to stain purples, blues, blacks and reds. Pein would scream hurtful words and insults at Deidara while the blonde begged for forgiveness and cried silently, refusing to let his Leader see or hear, for that would always draw a harsher beating and insults.

Sasori would always wait outside the door where Pein would dump Deidara's semi-conscious body and leave, shutting the door and Sasori would carry Deidara as gingerly as possible to their room and call Zetsu in to heal as much as possible, only to have Deidara whisper a broken apology to Sasori before passing out on the bed.

Deidara had gone in for surgery multiple times, once to properly remove the scar on his face, leaving it pure milky white skin, but other times the surgery had been darker. Pein had managed to shatter the fragile blonde's ribs when he was thirteen, turning fourteen, and had been unconscious for days before, during, and after the difficult procedure to heal the bones protecting the blonde's heart.

There were never scars, just bruises that littered his small body like coloured water, casually dropped and staining his skin.

It affected his performance in missions too. Sometimes, Sasori would have to keep Deidara in Hiruko, when other times the blonde would faint from strain mid-fight, and this worried Sasori. His young partner's health was failing, day after day, it was a struggle to wake him up, and sometimes, it petrified Sasori to near tears that one day... Deidara may not wake up again.

And his smile... That beautiful smile that had grown famous... It was dying... Sasori saw less and less of the beauty each month, and by the time Deidara was turning fifteen, he was once again the poor, broken shell that Sasori had been given to raise. He rarely spoke, rarely left his room, and sometimes had to be forced to eat and drink; Deidara was killing himself.

But it must have been the mission to Iwa that was the hay that broke the camel's back, so to speak.

"Deidara, can you do it?" "Un." Sasori watched as Deidara stood, thin but elegant form moving swiftly before jumping down into the empty room. They had to retrieve a scroll from the Hidden Iwa Temple which contained many forbidden and powerful Jutsu's. Sasori was almost begging for Deidara to remain awake the whole time so he could avoid getting hit again.

But this time was dangerous. If Deidara fainted, Sasori couldn't get him. He wasn't allowed. He had to go off and slaughter the surrounding guards, Deidara, the only one short and thin enough to fit, was to drop into the room, go into the corridor and steal the scroll, plant bombs, get out and detonate the area, then they would both meet at Akatsuki once their jobs were both complete.

Although they completed them separately, and neither would know if their partner had completed their task until when they returned.

Looking back quickly at the last glimpse of long, golden hair, Sasori's heart clenched in pain for his blonde.

"Please Deidara... Come home safe..."

* * *

"He's late." "He hasn't technically failed the mission." "And if he has, then he would be dead in Iwa." The harsh words brought another wash of dread and sorrow over Sasori who was wrapped in a warm blanket, blood red hair being dried by Konan. "He'll come home safe, I know it," she said softly as Sasori looked down, Pein snorting in anger and leaving the room with a mumbled, "If he can't complete a mission and live, he has no right to."

He wished to believe Konan's words, but the mission should have ended close to a week ago, and still no sign of Deidara. Sasori had stood outside guard, waiting for any glimpse of the one he longed to see so desperately. It had been raining heavily, which was odd for the winter, but brought about extra chills in the air. It had even snowed quite a few times.

"It's snowing now... That water will freeze, it's going to be slippery outside," Konan mused to herself, looking outside worriedly. Sasori let a bitter smile cross his face, a small chuckle passing his lips, head down. "Deidara loved the snow..." he said softly. Konan looked down, slowing down drying his hair. "I... I remember the first time Deidara saw the snow... I'd taken him outside... 'Danna, Danna, what's that, un? It's so pretty' he said. He was so happy and excited," Sasori said softly, a shaky laugh escaping him.

Konan blinked, lifting the towel up so she could see his face, raising the others chin, and for the first time in her life, saw Sasori with tears running down his semi-wooden face. "Konan, I want him back so bad, please, let me go looking for him," Sasori begged, looking into Konan's eyes. Shaking her head, she placed a hand on Sasori's shoulder, smiling. "I'd been meaning to tell you, the reason Itachi and Kisame aren't here is because they're searching for him, Pein doesn't know, so keep quiet about it, okay? They're going to bring him home," Konan said as Sasori gave a small nod, looking down and away again.

He couldn't bear the thought that Deidara might not be breathing, that his small tender heart may not be beating. He refused to accept it. "Konan..." The woman addressed looked up. "If he comes back-" "No, _when _he comes back," Konan cut in with a smile. Sasori nodded. "Yes... When he comes back... I'm going to tell him." Konan's eyes widened and her mouth parted in shock, speechless.

"_I'm going to tell my Deidara... That I love him..."_

* * *

Kisame gave a sigh. "We've searched everywhere and not a sign of him. The place is totally bombed so at least Deidara completed the mission half way and blew it up, now if only him and the scroll survived," Kisame mumbled, wrapping the cloak around him tighter, umbrella held up above him and Itachi.

With a shake of his head Kisame looked around the forest area. The two were on their way back to the base bearing the news of Deidara's confirmed death. "Sasori won't be happy," Itachi said softly as he stepped over a large patch of snow. "It's not easy to lose someone you've grown so close to," Kisame spoke, clutching Itachi's hand tighter. "Which is why I'm glad you're still here." Itachi continued staring ahead, nodding and smiling lightly, returning the tighter grip with a gentle squeeze.

There was a pause before Itachi sighed; his breathe fogging in front of him. "It's a shame... Deidara cared about Sasori, and that was when he was at least ten that his crush started, he hasn't changed at all, Sasori's the only one he'd listen to, and I guess now- Huh?" Itachi paused mid sentence and mid step, letting go of Kisame's hand.

Kisame continued walking before pausing, turning and walking back, keeping the umbrella above Itachi's head. "What is it?"

"Deidara."

Kisame froze, turning his head to see where Itachi was looking, gasping. A large lump of snow lay still, slightly higher than normal almost fifty metres from the base door, covered in snow, almost unnoticeable, but the definite flutter of a black cloak and blonde hair was unmistakable.

"DEIDARA!" Kisame shouted, both him and Itachi starting to run forward, stumbling over snow before stopping around the body. "Dig him out!" "Okay."

Together, Itachi and Kisame began to dig out the blonde with their bare hands, the snow becoming redder the closer they got to him before Kisame could lift him up, feeling for a pulse, temperature, breathing, anything. "He's frozen cold and barely with us, let's get him inside before he dies," Kisame said as Itachi nodded, running beside Kisame, the door exploding open as Kisame kicked it down.

"WE FOUND HIM! HEY! WE'VE FOUND DEIDARA!"

Sasori looked up, stunned. They found him? At last! Running towards the door he nearly crashed right into Kisame who was carrying Deidara quickly towards their shared room. "Where's Zetsu?" "He's gone, but how is he? How's my Deidara?" "Alive, barely, we need to warm him up and get some food into him, stay there, I'm going to get some hot water bottles, Itachi, come with me and get him some hot liquid food." "Okay."

Within seconds, Sasori was left alone in his shared room, looking down at Deidara. Tears rolled down his cheeks in relief and fear. He looked... Terrible... Ice had found its way across his face, the beautiful milky white skin had turned a deathly pale blue, once soft red lips were frozen and a deep blue, hair a yellow-muddy colour and a mess around him, slashes covering his body that had frozen blood, and... Lots of blood. And frozen tear stains on his cheeks.

Sasori shook his head, leaning down and placing Deidara's head comfortably on the pillow, pulling blanket after blanket over his icy body, gently taking a cold hand. Even his palm mouths were cold, but they were shut.

"Deidara... What have I done...? I'm sorry... I've let you down..." he whispered, gently rubbing the back of Deidara's hand as running footsteps were heard, Konan bursting into the door first, relief on her face, but then serious determination. "Sasori, undress him and get him into a warm bath, not to hot or you'll send his body into shock, and then dress him into something warm. Do it now!" She ordered before vanishing, blue strings of hair flying behind her.

Sasori sat in shock for a while before looking at Deidara, blushing slightly before pulling the blankets off and lifting the limp body in his arms, carrying him into their shared bathroom before starting to fill the tub with lukewarm water. Looking back at Deidara he blushed a bit before making Deidara lean up against the sink, slowly unzipping his cloak, pulling it off, hearing ice crackling as it was broken off.

And that's where he saw what he hadn't seen before. Wrapped around his chest was a tight bandage and just barely poking out of the bandage was the scroll they were meant to have taken during the mission. Tears were at the corner of Sasori's eyes as he shook his head. Idiot... He'd done his mission.

Cutting the bandages that held the scroll to Deidara's body, he put the parchment down before slowly slipping his hands up Deidara's shirt before pulling it above his head, swallowing hard. He couldn't think of this as undressing him, he had to think of it as helping him get better!

Gripping the edge of Deidara's bloodied pants; he looked at Deidara's face. "Forgive me Deidara," he whispered before completely undressing him and placing him in the warm water, the liquid almost instantly being dyed red from thawing out blood. Trembling as he washed Deidara's soft body and cleaned his wounds, Sasori couldn't help but observe how unwell his partner had truly become.

By the time he had finished getting all of the blood off, dried him and gotten him dressed into thick, warm clothing and layed him on the bed, Kisame had layed out the hot water bottles around and inside the bed and pillow and a bowl of hot soup sat on the bedside table. Covering him up, he gently stroked Deidara's cheek, looking at his peaceful face.

Taking a hold of Deidara's hand again, he raised it to his lips, closing his eyes and gently pressed a soft kiss to the back of Deidara's now warmed hand.

"Please... Wake up..." Sasori begged softly.

* * *

"Is he still sleeping?" "He's not asleep." "Really?! That's great! Can I go talk to him?" "Talk all you want, he won't be replying."

Sasori paused, looking up at Zetsu who had just exited the room. "What the hell do you mean? He's not asleep but he won't talk? That just doesn't make sense-" "He's in a coma." The words hit Sasori hard. He had found it odd and worrisome for someone to sleep through nearly a whole week, but... Coma...

"Wake him up!"

"I wish I could, but I can't."

"BULLSHIT!"

Forcing his way past Zetsu he looked around the room at some of the odd chakra vents that had been set up next to, or connected to Deidara. It had been set up nearly as soon as Zetsu had been called back, most machines helped Deidara to breathe, others controlled his temperature, whilst others kept him fed and nourished through odd tubes that went into his veins.

"We have hopes that if he's as stable as he is now, he may wake up in a week."

"What do you mean _may_ Zetsu?" Sasori scowled, glaring at the plant man. "We mean that his heart's been weakened and is failing him. If his condition doesn't improve within two weeks, we're cutting support and we'll have to Euthanize him." Sasori stared in shock, shaking his head. "No... NO! YOU'RE NOT GOING TO KILL HIM! NO ONE WILL HURT HIM OR I'LL DISEMBOWL THEM, TEAR THEM TO PIECES AND TORTURE THEM IN SUCH A WAY DEATH WILL BE PLEASURABLE!"

Zetsu stared unemotionally as Sasori shouted at him before sighing, shaking his head. "Accept it. **It was your fault for getting attached to the brat. **We're sorry," Zetsu spoke before turning and leaving Sasori alone in the doorway.

Slamming the door, he moved back to Deidara's bed, sitting down, scowling at the chuckle on the other side of the door. That fucker, he was finding it amusing of his pain. Of Deidara's pain. Looking back at Deidara, he heaved a deep sigh, shaking his head; he crossed his arms, letting them rest on the bed, placing his head in his arms, closing his eyes.

"_Ne, Danna What's this stuff? It doesn't look nice, un..." "Brat! Don't eat that!" "UWA!! HOT!! HOT!! CHILLY IS HOT, UN!"_

Shifting uncomfortably, Sasori tried to steady his breathing.

"_Oh! Danna, that's awesome! I wanna be an awesome artist, just like you, un!" "You've got a long way to go before you catch up brat." "I'm not a brat, un! I'm growin' up, un!" "You keep telling yourself that short stuff." "I am NOT short, un!" "And that's precisely why you're half my height."_

A lump was forming in Sasori's throat, forcing himself to try and contain his emotions.

"_Danna... Is it okay for me to... To like guys, un?" "Of course it is, doesn't stop Hidan and Kakuzu, or Itachi and Kisame." "S-So... You're okay with me... Being gay, un?" "Sure." "Thank you so much, un! Love ya Danna, un!"_

Cringing at his memories, a tear rolled down Sasori's cheek.

That smile... It was haunting him. It always had been; that beautiful smile of Deidara's.

"_I'm happy... Happy to be with you... You make me smile, un, and I hope that you find someone too that'll give you lots of happiness, un!" "Did Hidan give you something to drink? What're you rambling about?" "I don't drink, un... I'm just saying... I'm glad to have met you is all, un..."_

"God damnit... Why...? WHY THE FUCK AM I DOING THIS?!" Sasori shouted, wiping tears away forcefully. "WHAT AM I MEANT TO DO!? I CAN'T DO ANYTHING! HE'S DYING AND I CAN'T DO A THING! HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME TO WAKE HIM UP!?"

"...With a Kiss..."

Sasori sat bolt upright, looking down at soft, shining azure blue eyes and a soft, tender smile.

"That's... How you wake most Princesses, un..."

* * *

**Ah, Deidara's awake!!! 33 Quite the relief. I felt so sad when I was writing this... Made me sad typing how Sasori was sad. Yay! Angst-fest! XD So of course I had to wake Deidara up. But still, what's this Zetsu's talking about? Heart Failure? Could he recover? Or has Deidara been hiding this for a lot longer? And how is he going to recover from the state he's in? Poor things, I really wish I wasn't so sadistic and causing these two pain, but hey, it entertains, no? Hope you enjoyed it so far, enjoy the next chapter! :33**


	6. Chapter 6

_**You know? Only because I hate cliffhangers and being cruel, I thought I may as well upload the next chapter. I felt I couldn't leave it at Deidara waking up and then leaving you guys to wait for a whole week or two. So here we are, alsoa Note for next Chapter. The next Chapter will have some Lemon in it, just to warn you all. :3 Reviews are beautiful and loved! :3**_

_**

* * *

**_

Chapter Six

At first, he thought himself delusional, having finally lost it. Deidara was awake and smiling at him. Smiling for him. "I... I did the mission Sasori no Danna, un," Deidara spoke softly, smiling a bit more, gentleness in his eyes. Sasori smiled warily, leaning down and gently kissing Deidara's forehead. "You came home alive Deidara," Sasori spoke. "I'm relieved. How did you do it?"

"My life is important to me, un."

Freezing, Sasori blinked, confused as Deidara smiled, nodding to himself, closing his eyes. "Un... I asked myself when I got into the room the question you'd ask me on my birthday; I asked myself 'What is the most important thing in the world to me?' And I knew my life was important, nothing else in the world matters to me, un," Deidara said softly.

Sasori's heart froze. His life? This wasn't Deidara. Deidara never sounded so vain, he always cared for others. "N-Nothing in the world? So if you could have anything in the world, what would you choose?"

"I choose my life, un."

Sasori felt hurt, almost insulted, pushed aside. To think Deidara, who he had raised had become so... Uncaring. "How cruel... To say this to me... To say this to the one who... Who stood in snow, rain and storm waiting for you to come home... You would choose living selfishly over..." He couldn't finish his sentence; he turned, standing, ready to leave.

He'd given Deidara his heart, soul and very being, and as much as he understood and respected that everyone's life was important to them, whenever he had asked that question before, it had been the same, gentle, caring reply.

"_I want for all my friends to be happy and find love and peace, un."_

What had made him change? Turning, starting to walk away, he found his wrist caught in another soft, warm grasp which was tugging lightly. He smiled bitterly. Just like when Deidara was a kid, he still clung to Sasori and tugged softly when he wanted the red head's attention.

"Danna... Are you angry with me, un?"

"Yes, and slightly disappointed. Your answer changed."

"It's for the better, un."

"What the hell do you mean?!"

"But don't you see Danna? I chose my life, but _you _are my life, un."

These words stunned Sasori. He hadn't expected this kind of reply. Turning his head to look at Deidara, he saw the boy blushing a deep red but smiling, if not nervously. "What are you talking about?" Sasori asked softly, turning and moving forward, not daring to believe it was true, not wanting to risk making a fool of himself, or making an odd assumption.

"How can you still not see, un? Don't you see me? I see you, all of you, and I've fallen in love with you... You're my life, my world, my Danna... I love you, un," Deidara spoke softly, heart beating heavily in his chest. There... He'd said it. After so many years, he could finally say it to Sasori; he'd finally worked up the courage to do it. He'd told himself as he dropped into the room that he had to complete this mission so he could tell Sasori how he felt.

And now, he was worried he'd lose his Danna forever because of his heart.

Taking a step forward, Sasori sat on the edge of Deidara's bed, gently cupping his cheek, rubbing it gently with the pad of his thumb, chuckling at the small blush that formed across Deidara's cheeks. Leaning down so their faces were barely inches away from each other, Sasori smiled.

"I love you too Brat," he whispered softly before gently pressing their lips together.

Deidara's eyes widened. He knew Sasori's reaction would be different from anger, but... To have his feeling returned... Was magical.

Closing his eyes, he gently wrapped his arms around Sasori's neck, his fingers tangling in blood red hair, returning and deepening the kiss. Sasori tilted his head slightly so their lips moulded perfectly against each other, running his tongue softly along Deidara's bottom lip, begging for entrance softly. Deidara gasped at the feeling of Sasori's tongue and the red head took advantage of it, slipping his tongue into Deidara's mouth, tasting the sweet, sugary taste that was Deidara, and in turn, Deidara savoured the unique cinnamon taste of his Danna.

Their tongues fought for dominance briefly, dancing together, but soon Sasori won, reaping his reward with a kiss he had longed to get for many years and a soft moan passing from Deidara's mouth. Shivers ran up and down Sasori's spine. That was a beautiful and intoxicating sound.

Soon the red head pulled back for air, feeling Deidara's chest heaving in desperation for oxygen and smiled at the blonde whose cheeks were deeply flushed, mouth parted to allow air to pass to his deprived lungs. He was truly beautiful in Sasori's mind.

"Danna, un..." Deidara breathed out, cheeks painted red. Sasori blinked, lying beside Deidara and wrapping an arm protectively around the younger one's shoulders. "Yes Dei?"

"You know... How you told me... About... About how guys... Make love, un?"

"Yes."

"C-Could... Could we... Do a practical too, un?"

Sasori smiled, looking at his flushed partner. As tempting as it was to make love to his gorgeous, young and willing blonde, he knew he couldn't. Not now.

"Dei, you're young, you wouldn't want to lose your virginity at this age. And not to mention you've just woken up from being in a coma for a week, your body's not well enough yet, I'd only end up hurting you more than pleasuring you," Sasori explained softly, looking at Deidara whose eyes were looking up pleadingly at Sasori. "But Danna, I know what I want, un. I've wanted you for so long, it's okay, un," he spoke softly, gently nuzzling Sasori's chest. The red head smiled.

"Get better. As soon as you're better and fully healed and I think you're ready, I promise we'll have sex. But until then, rest, okay?"

Deidara made a small pout before sighing and nodded, closing his eyes and keeping close to Sasori. "Okay... Thank you... I love you Sasori no Danna, un." "Love you too Dei."

* * *

And due to his promise, Deidara started to get better. Missions were put on hold for the two so Sasori could care for his young partner. He'd leave the room only to get supplies or make some food, but then returned and shut their door. Sasori was the only one Deidara would listen to, and smile for so freely, it felt like he'd gotten Deidara back at last.

He'd sit by his bed, feeding him. At first it was all soups and Deidara would pout and fight and argue that he was bored of soup until Sasori created the 'Reward System'. With every spoonful of soup he had, Sasori would reward him with a gentle kiss, and when the bowl was empty, he'd give him a more passionate kiss.

This made every meal something to look forward to, and he found Deidara anxious to eat as well.

But his body was still weak from starvation in previous years, so he couldn't over feed him, but day by day he gave the blonde more to eat and helped his appetite grow slowly. No solid foods were allowed until close to a month later, and he did the same routine, starting off with small amounts, and then slowly increased the amount he'd feed him.

Deidara even started whining that he wanted more soup, but only because Sasori would spoon feed him and kiss him.

Zetsu would come every second day to do medical checks on Deidara and sometimes even add an extra chakra flow into his system to help blood circulation, breathing and increase his recovery rate. The bruises had all but faded and the cuts had healed flawlessly and Deidara's skinny figure had gained much needed weight, according to Zetsu. He'd been close to being severely underweight and anorexic, skin and bones, but Sasori was grateful he'd gotten him fed.

He had to help Deidara sit up properly, and sometimes would allow the blonde to stand up and try to help him walk around the room to stretch his muscles and stop them from seizing up and forgetting how to do simple things like walk.

When Sasori found Deidara too fidgety to simply lie or sit in his bed, or even walk around the room, he had helped him to the drawer, looked away and let him get dressed-- Sasori had never told him, nor did he plan to, that he had already seen Deidara's body when he'd washed and dressed him-- and then led him to the kitchen to choose his own meal, holding his hand the whole time.

When entering, a chorus of cheers erupted that stunned the two of them, other members happy to see Deidara walking about the base and almost equally happy to see that the red head was holding his hand, but with meaning. Comments flew through the air like "Congratulations Deidara!" "Glad to see you're well!" "You go boys!" and even someone, particularly Kisame, shouting "ABOUT TIME YOU TWO GOT TOGETHER!"

More frequent trips to and from the room became normal, and Sasori could let go of Deidara's hand and watch him walk on his own, and soon, start jogging and running on his own.

When Spring was in full bloom and Sakura petals were falling against their window sill, Sasori had taken Deidara outside for fresh air, to see the sun and the birds and flowers, and had been rewarded with Deidara's beautiful smile. They ran around, laughed, talked and eventually Deidara fell asleep in the comfiest place he could find. In Sasori's lap under a blooming Sakura tree.

Not that Sasori minded, he was used to sitting under this tree and watching Deidara run and play before curling up in his lap, it was adorable, and just because he was turning 16 didn't mean the cuteness had left the young blonde when he padded up to Sasori and curled up beside him, head in Sasori's lap.

He was becoming stronger too, able to do laps, push ups, sit ups and was soon able to start fighting again, and in much better condition than before. Now, instead of pulling back, he was fighting full force, landing hit after hit on Sasori, barely getting struck back. It was Sasori's turn to worry for his partner, but it still made him smile at the look of determination on Deidara's face, the thoughtful frown, eye studying Sasori analytically.

Even during the hot Summer months, Deidara persisted powerfully, and on the day of his 16th birthday, Konan had a surprise for him.

* * *

"Look at you! All grown up! You're almost a man Deidara!" "Save for his girly hair and body..." "Shut up Kakuzu, leave him be, he's gorgeous!"

Konan sighed, smiling. She pulled Deidara into a hug, kissing his cheek. "You're making me envious," She said as Deidara smiled and blushed, laughing. "Aw, I'm sorry Konan-Nee-Chan, un I'll try to tone down how awesomely smexy I look!" Deidara said as he hugged Konan, lifting her and spinning her before putting the laughing blue haired woman down. "Oh Deidara, it's gonna be hard to stop those swarms of girls and boys from coming after you," She said as she tried to fix her hair, hoping none had come out of her bun.

"I'll keep them away, no one's taking Deidara away from me, he's mine," Sasori spoke from his seat as he pulled Deidara down into his lap, wrapping his arms possessively around Deidara's slim waist.

Laughing, Konan shook her head. "I can see, and you know what, in a great celebration of our Deidara's birthday and of your relationship, we've all chipped in-" "Bullshit! You stole the money all from _me_!" Kakuzu cut in, obvious distaste in his voice.

Sighing, Konan nodded before continuing. "We've booked you two in to a nice hotel in Iwagakure near the springs for a week," She said, holding up two tickets, Deidara gasping and bouncing happily. "Thank you! Thank you, un!" "Deidara, please stop bouncing in my lap..." Deidara stopped, blinking and looked down at Sasori who was blushing slightly, face turned away from the general public.

"Yeah, 'Bounce in his lap' all you fuckin' want at the hotel, so long as we can't hear you screaming each other's fuckin' names," Hidan said with a smirk, making Deidara blush and hide his face in Sasori's neck, the red head glaring at Hidan in turn.

"Watch it or you'll be done with your 'Fun Time' with Kakuzu, don't think we can't hear you bastards," Sasori shot at Hidan, making the man blush deeply, scowl and look away. Deidara smiled, laughing.

"_And hopefully... Danna and I can finally be alone... I won't have to worry about keeping my voice down then."_

* * *

**Oooh~ About time those two got together indeed. A whole bloody 6 Chapters. Ah well, Plot development was needed, I never really was a fan of the whole "Love at First Sight". It's good, I love it, but for this story I think it would have been... Er... Crap... And possibly Paedophelia. Sasori at age fourty something with a six year old. Eep. Lol, well, any way, hope you enjoyed this, and like I said before, Lemon's in next chapter. My first shot at it, but hey, I hope it comes out somewhat decent -_-'' **


	7. Chapter 7

**_Ah, I'm quite happy, and surprised :o Not even a day or two after uploading the first few chapters of the story, and I've already gotten reviews! zOMG Shocking! I never thought it would be so popular! Okay, Okay, so two reviews, but still... To me that's amazing and it makes me quite happy! 33 I do try and reply to each review when I get the time, but in advance, sorry if I do miss yours or yours doesn't get a reply, or, if it takes forever and a day. ^_^'' I'd like to also thank those who have added my story, or me as an author, to their favourites, I was really shocked at how MANY there were, so, I thought as a thank you, why not give you guys another Chapter a bit early, yeah? I really hope you enjoy it, adn thank you to all of you!! 3 Much appreciated!_**

* * *

**_Chapter Seven_**

"OH MY JASHIN! THAT'S HUGE, UN!" "Deidara, even as a joke, never say Jashin." "BUT IT IS! THAT'S FREAKIN' HUGE! I'VE NEVER SEEN ANYTHING SO BIG IN MY LIFE, UN!"

Sasori chuckled, dropping their suitcases down in a corner of the room. His partner had had an expression of complete awe and amazement on all day, especially since they had arrived in Iwagakure. They had booked into their hotel room secretly under the cover of night and in a disguise, using wigs and costume, and to Deidara's shame, he'd had to wear a dress. But even the blonde had to admit, he looked pretty damn hot in it, and he had a feeling Sasori thought so too. The red head had gripped his nose tightly most of the way, and whenever he looked towards him, Deidara swore he caught his Master having a perve. But still, to tease the other further, he'd gotten changed out of the dress to long pants and a shirt as soon as possible.

Sasori hadn't been pleased about that.

"Danna! Oh my gosh! Check out this view, un! It's so beautiful!" Deidara cried happily, rushing to the window, leaning out and staring around happily. Walking forward, Sasori wrapped his arms around Deidara's waist from behind, resting his chin on his shoulder. "It is, isn't it?" he asked softly.

It was perfect. Both of them knew they couldn't have asked for a better place to be alone. "Ne... Sasori no Danna, un..." "Yes Deidara?" "Y-You know how... Y'know..." "No, could you explain?" "Unnn..."

Sasori chuckled, turning Deidara around, lifting his chin up. "Why are you getting all shy around me now, eh?" he asked, looking at Deidara's blushing face. "No need to blush, I already think you're adorable," Sasori chuckled, kissing Deidara on the lips softly, pleasantly surprised when he felt Deidara's arms around his neck, pulling him closer, deepening the kiss.

After their small kiss, he let Deidara bury his face in Sasori's neck. "I... I'm old enough now, un... And... My body's healed..." Sasori's eyes widened slightly, heart thudding in its container as he held Deidara. He had a feeling he knew what Deidara was asking, but he had to be sure.

"Say it Dei... Don't be afraid to ask me anything," Sasori said softly. All he needed were those words, he'd been knocking himself out some nights to not screw his beautiful partner senseless, especially when he lay awake, listening to Deidara's lustful dreams, it was so hard to control himself.

But now that Deidara was officially of age, and his body seemed to have healed flawlessly, he couldn't contain himself much longer, especially when they were all alone in a hotel for a week.

Pressing Deidara up against the wall beside the window, he ran his hands gently down Deidara's elegant curved sides and hips. "Tell me Dei... What do you want...?" He breathed in the others ear, slipping his leg between Deidara's, gently pressing upwards, causing a soft gasp and moan to flit past Deidara's lips. "D-Danna..." "Tell me Dei... Don't make me wait... You know how much I hate waiting..."

Deidara moaned out again as Sasori started to move back, only to grab him and pull him forward, pressing their bodies flush up against each other, grinding himself down on Sasori's thigh, rolling his hips.

"Make love to me Danna, un... Please... I need you, un..."

Sasori smirked, moving his head back to look at Deidara, the blue eyes begging him lustfully, cheeks tainted red and a look of want on his face. "All I needed to hear," he whispered before leaning in and crashing their lips together in a searing, passionate kiss.

Sasori tilted his head, their lips moving perfectly against each other, his tongue gently swiping over Deidara's bottom lip, nibbling it gently. Deidara already knew this sign and parted his lips instantly, allowing Sasori to ravish his mouth, making him moan in to the kiss, their tongues battling for dominance. A battle Sasori once again won.

Placing his hand on Deidara's thigh, he gently rubbed it before lifting it to his waist, Deidara taking the hint and wrapping his leg around Sasori's waist, doing so with the other when he was pressed heatedly up against the wall.

With one hand on Deidara's back, the other on his ass, Sasori started to carry Deidara to the bed, laying him down on the mattress, only breaking the kiss so he could crawl on top of the blonde, settling in between his legs, letting him breathe. He listened to Deidara's panting for a while before he leant down, capturing his lips again, placing his hands on Deidara's hips, moving his hands up the bomb artists shirt, making the clothing ride up before breaking the kiss once more to take the shirt off, dropping it to the ground beside them.

Trailing the kisses from Deidara's abused lips, he moved them over his cheek and softly sucked on his earlobe, creating another soft mewl from Deidara. Tracing the outer shell with his tongue, he moved back to suck and nibble at his earlobe softly, listening to the hot panting in his ear.

"D-Danna..." Deidara panted "... Please... Unnn..." he gasped out between breathes. The teasing was so nice yet it was starting to make him hotter and more restless, anxious for the mouth to go lower.

Moving back down across his jaw line, Sasori made his way down to the sculptures neck, kissing and nipping before biting down and sucking on a tender spot near the jugular vein, causing a loud gasp and moan to pass from Deidara's throat, the blonde's hands entangling in his red hair, pulling him closer, neck arching and head tilting away for better access to the sensitive flesh. After a few more nips and sucks Sasori lifted his head, softly licking before kissing the hickey he'd left on Deidara's neck, another soft moan sounding, moving down slowly to create another one.

Trailing his lips lower, he left a line of hickeys leading down Deidara's neck and to his collarbone where Sasori bit gently, moving down to Deidara's chest. He could feel Deidara trembling beneath him and he looked up to his partners face. It had 'Sexually Appealing' and 'Fuck Me' written all over it, and he barely got out the question.

"Are you okay? Did you want me to stop?"

Deidara shook his head, hands either side of his head. "N-No... please... More..." he panted softly. Oh lord, it sounded so good to hear Deidara begging.

Not needing further instructions, he circled one of Deidara's nipples with his tongue before sucking softly, biting it gently, earning a cry of pleasure from Deidara as he pinched and rubbed the other. Letting go of the one in his mouth he switched to the other side, giving it the same treatment until they were both erect.

He started moving down, lower and lower, his tongue tracing every dip, curve and muscle on Deidara's flat and toned stomach before dipping his tongue in and out of his bellybutton, smirking mentally at the pleading mewls coming from Deidara's lips.

Lifting his head he gently ran his hands over Deidara's thighs, rubbing the inner skin of the thighs through the pants, making sure to miss exactly where he knew Deidara wanted him to touch. Soon his hands found their way to the rather impressive tent and Sasori couldn't help but stare. Oh yes, his little Dei had grown in the right places.

Placing his hand over the bump he pressed down, rubbing softly, earning another cry of pleasure from Deidara. "My... Look at you... You _are _enjoying this Dei-Dei," he purred, gently hooking his fingers under the cloth and tugging it down slowly, leaving Deidara only in his boxers. "Nnn... D-Danna... Please, un..." "Please what Dei?" "Please... F-Fuck me... Unnn."

Sasori smirked, leaning up. "Help me get my clothes off Dei," he said softly. He never knew that when Deidara was filled with lust he could be so... Well... Un-Deidara like. The blonde's hands went up, pulling Sasori down into a searing kiss before his hands started to feverishly remove Sasori's shirt, feeling up the skin underneath.

Pushing himself up, Deidara's lips started to move down, following the same path Sasori had taken on him, only he had a different goal in mind. "AH! Oh my god... _Dei..._" Sasori cried out, cheeks flushing a light red, eyes shut with pleasure as Deidara started to lick, kiss and nibble his heart container, teasing the edges with his teeth, earning loud moans from Sasori.

As he was doing so, Deidara's hands slipped downwards, unzipping and pulling Sasori's pants down his thighs, his mouth pulling away from the heart container, leaving both of them panting, a light sheet of sweat covering their bodies, eyes connecting. "You sure you haven't been practicing this all behind my back?" Sasori asked teasingly with a smile as Deidara offered him a seductive smirk. "Only this, un," Deidara whispered, his hands dipping into Sasori's boxers, palm mouths opening, tongues wrapping around Sasori's member, making Sasori gasp and cry out in pleasure again.

At first Deidara teased the other, the tongue taking light feathery licks from the base to the tip before Deidara removed his hands, pushing Sasori onto his back and completely removing the pants, grabbing the hem of the boxers with his teeth and, keeping eye contact with Sasori, pulled them down teasingly slow, making sure to brush his lips against Sasori's erect member.

Once they too were removed, Deidara smirked. His turn to tease. "Unnn Danna... Look... You're so _hard _for me, un... And so _big_, I dun' think you'll fit, un," he teased softly, leaning down and giving Sasori's erection a long, hard lick from base to tip. "Ah... God damnit Dei..." Sasori breathed out, his hand tangling in the long blonde locks, resting on Deidara's head, pushing him downwards.

Deidara pushed back against the hand, content in teasing Sasori for all he was worth, licking the tip, teasing the slit with his tongue before blowing gently, sending small jolts of pleasure through Sasori.

When he felt he'd teased Sasori enough, he took in a deep breath before deep-throating Sasori all at once. Sasori threw his head back, mouth parted in a silent scream. How did his little blonde get so damn _good_???

Untying the ribbon that held Deidara's hair up he threw it to the floor, pushing Deidara's head down more, bucking his hips subconsciously. Soon, he felt his climax reaching, gasping softly, grip in Deidara's hair tightening. "Dei... I'm going to cum," he whispered, biting his lip hard to try and keep his voice down.

Deidara didn't reply but only sucked harder, bobbing his head up and down his length, humming. Oh lord, he was _humming_! The little vibrations sending shockwaves of pleasure through Sasori's pulsating member, making a loud moan pass his lips as he came into Deidara's mouth, the blonde greedily swallowing and sucking for extra measure.

Leaning up after he'd made sure he'd swallowed every bit of Sasori's sweet juice, he smirked, the palm mouths licking their lips as he leant over Sasori, back arched slightly, eyes half lidded in lust, a small trail of cum running from the corner of his lips and down his chin.

The sight was so orgasmic Sasori almost instantly became hard again.

"Danna... There's a reason I put up sound barriers on our bathroom, un... I had to practice for you, now didn't, I, un?"

The thought of Deidara in the shower, leaning against the wall, pleasuring himself and moaning Sasori's name was almost too much to bear, blood rushing to his cheeks and groin. It was too hot a thought.

Sasori pulled Deidara down for a kiss, licking the cum off Deidara's chin and lips, kissing him, tasting himself and Deidara before he quickly flipped him and Deidara over so the blonde's back was on the mattress. "If I had known you were doing such things in the room beside me while I made puppets, I would have spent more time watching than chipping wood," Sasori breathed down, Deidara shivering in anticipation.

"Un... We can start getting kinkier after this..." He teased. Sasori smirked. "You name it, wall, shower, couch, kitchen table, where ever I'll do exactly what I'm about to do now... Pound you senseless."

Deidara nearly came at the sensual tone Sasori used, moaning softly in agreement. Sasori placed three fingers at Deidara's lips, looking down at him with a smile, giving the command "Suck."

Taking a hold of Sasori's wrist, Deidara brought the hand close, parting his lips and started to coat the fingers with saliva, nibbling gently and sucking, treating the fingers almost in the exact same way he'd treated Sasori's member.

Sasori groaned softly, the blonde beneath him keeping eye contact the whole time. Before Sasori could go insane from the mental images Deidara was giving him, he removed his fingers, trailing them down to the blonde's entrance, circling it.

"This will hurt. Relax, it gets better, okay?" Sasori said softly as Deidara nodded, spreading his legs more, wrapping his arms around Sasori's neck.

Gently pushing in the first finger, Sasori gave a small moan of delight at how _tight _Deidara was. Lord, was this possible? He'd been presented with a gift here! He was drawn back from his thoughts as Deidara let out a small whimper, pushing his back up against the mattress, drawing away slightly from the intrusion. Leaning down, Sasori gently kissed Deidara's neck. "Shh... It'll get better, relax... Relax Dei..." He whispered softly against the blonde's neck.

When he felt Deidara getting used to it, he started to move the finger in and out slowly before then adding a second finger, a slightly louder whimper escaping Deidara and he had to use his other hand to gently stroke Deidara's erection to distract him, gaining a mewl of pleasure when he started to move the fingers in and out again, scissoring slightly to stretch him further.

Gripping the erection slightly harder as he pumped it, he added a third finger, not being able to tell now if the gasp Deidara gave out was of pleasure, pain, or both, but possible the latter. As his fingers moved in and out of Deidara's entrance, scissoring occasionally, he tried searching for a small bundle of nerves inside of his partner.

As Deidara was about to tell Sasori that it was hurting he cried out in pleasure, back arching off the bed. _"Found it," _Sasori thought successfully.

Thrusting his fingers a few more times in that direction, finger fucking the young boy, he felt him stretched enough when he saw Deidara trying to press down on the fingers, eager for more.

Removing them, and getting a whimper of disappointment, Sasori positioned himself at the boy's entrance, gripping his hips gently, looking down at him. Their eyes met and they stared at each other for a while before Deidara gently wrapped his legs around Sasori's waist, his arms around his neck.

"Fuck me Danna... Fuck me hard and all night long, un..." Deidara breathed hotly, eyes half lidded and clouded with lust. That was all Sasori needed to hear, and with Deidara rubbing his ass down on Sasori's erection, he couldn't take it anymore. Gripping Deidara's hips, he thrust in swiftly so that he was sheathed in one swift move to the hilt, letting out a loud moan as Deidara cried out in pain, tears at his eyes, running down his cheeks.

Sasori leant down, gently kissing away the blonde's tears before moving down and kissing Deidara tenderly. "It'll be okay soon," he said softly as Deidara let out a choked moan and sob he had tried to hold back. "Danna... It... It hurts... You're too big, un..." he whispered softly, nails digging lightly into Sasori's back. The red head looked down, concerned but tried to keep things light. "Shall I take it as a compliment?" "F-Fuck yes, un." Sasori let a small chuckle pass his lips, leaning down and softly biting and sucking on Deidara's neck, slowly creating another hickey. "It'll feel good soon."

After a while, he felt Deidara's legs tighten around his waist and him start to shift and squirm impatiently. "Move, un."

Slowly, Sasori pulled out nearly all the way before pushing back in slowly and as gently as possible. Sasori was using every single ounce of self control to not simply loose himself and thrust hard and fast into the tight heat surrounding his member.

He slowly began to thrust in and out of the blonde bomb artist, listening to the soft moans that he received. Starting to thrust at different angles, Sasori started searching for Deidara's prostate, grinning to himself when Deidara's back arched off the bed, crying out in pleasure. "Unn! D-Danna... Harder!" Deidara begged, rolling his hips lightly.

Sasori didn't need to be told twice, thrusting harder into the blonde, aiming to hit the younger male's sweet spot every time. "Faster! Harder! Unn~ Dear _god! _Danna~!" Deidara cried out, crying out in pleasure as Sasori continued to thrust harder and faster into Deidara, both in a world of ecstasy.

The room felt scorching and their sweat-slicken bodies moved against each other perfectly, Sasori thrusting in hard each time, getting deeper and deeper as Deidara screamed in pleasure. "D-Da.... Nnn... I'm g-gonna... C-Cuuum.... Unnn!" If that wasn't the most orgasmic thing Sasori hard heard in his lifetime, and to see Deidara lying beneath him, thin muscled body covered in a thin layer of sweat, blonde hair splayed around his head and shoulders across the pillow like a halo, some of the golden strands sticking to his face, neck and chest, a deep red blush painting his cheeks, eyes shut tight in pleasure, tongue resting lazily on his bottom lip, mouth parted to let in the panting breathes.

How he wanted to keep that look forever, it was beautiful.

Gripping Deidara's pulsating and neglected member, Sasori started to pump it in time with the thrusts, making Deidara scream in pleasure.

"Together Dei... Cum with me," Sasori breathed in the others ear, kissing his lips tenderly.

Moaning into Sasori's mouth, Deidara arched his back clean off the bed, their lips drawing away, Deidara screaming Sasori's name in pleasure as he came all over their stomachs and chest, walls tightening around Sasori's member further, causing Sasori to reach his climax as well with a deep moan.

Slowing down his thrusts, Sasori leaned over Deidara, simply hovering above him before slowly, and gently, pulling out, Deidara giving a small whimper and mewl, feeling some of Sasori's seed run down his thigh, shivering in delight. Lying down beside each other, they remained silent for a moment in each other's arms, catching their breathes before Sasori pulled his blonde into a tight hug, pressing a soft kiss to the artists forehead.

"That was amazing Danna, un..." Deidara breathed out, nuzzling Sasori's chest softly as Sasori smiled. "You were amazing," he spoke.

After a soft sigh, Deidara looked up at Sasori, his azure blue eyes blinking softly up at Sasori. "Danna, un?" "Yes Dei?" "How long have you been calling me that behind my back, un?" Sasori blinked, looking down at the playful smirk Deidara was giving him. He chuckled. "Deidara's too long to moan, and I think it would kill the mood if I called you brat. You like Dei?" "Un, very much." Sasori smiled, watching Deidara rub his chest gently. Reaching up, he carefully stroked Deidara's hair, earning a soft sigh of appreciation from the blonde. "You've got sensitive hair." "I know, un." "Does this really feel good?" "Ever wondered why I'd refuse to let people touch my hair, un?" "You were aroused by it?" "You make me sound like a whore, un." "I'm sorry Dei," Sasori said gently, kissing Deidara's lips softly.

"Danna... We can do that... More... Right?"

Sasori chuckled, covering Deidara's body with the sheets, pulling him closely.

"Get some rest."

"But I've got plenty of energy to waste, un! I can still go for hours!"

"Please don't say that, I might just rape you in your sleep."

"Surprise Sex, un. Not rape if I enjoy it."

"Go to sleep Brat."

"I love you too Danna, un."

Sasori smiled, watching Deidara's eyes flutter closed, feeling Deidara's chest slow down to a steady and even pace. He'd fallen asleep. Although this was the first time they'd had sex, it wasn't the first time sleeping in the same bed. Deidara had gotten rather upset when Sasori had let him fall asleep and then left and slept in his own bed, demanding he'd get better if Sasori slept with him. So by now, Sasori knew how the blonde felt, breathed, and looked when he was sleeping.

"_It must be a crime to look that beautiful, even in sleep,"_ he thought with a smile, kissing Deidara's forehead softly. He couldn't help himself; he'd fallen head over heels for this young blonde boy. He gave a small chuckle in realisation. Deidara _was _young, sixteen to be exact. And he was in his fifties.

"Congratulations. You've turned me into a Paedophile Deidara."

* * *

***Clutches Nose Bleed* Well, that's that done. Holy crap, imagine trying to do this in a room filled with people. It's times like this I love Microsoft with giving the option to lock your computer and change passwords regularly. . Well, like I said, this Chapter was all Lemon, and yeah, there will be future Lemon in the story, more to come. This was my first official Lemon, so it might suck a bit, but hey, hope that it's at least slightly decent... Anyway, I might be a while uploading the next chapter, just so I can finish Chapter 11. I don't want to feel too lazy, so I'm writing heaps right now. I wonder if I continue writing like this I'll have the whole story uploaded within a week or two?? o.O Any way, this was a bit of a gift for the reviews and adds, so, hope you enjoyed this chapter and the story so far. I'll try upload the next chapter A.S.A.P, unless of course any other tests come at me *Shakes fist***


	8. Chapter 8

_**Uwa~ Happy Halloween Everyone! Gah, a bit late by a few days, but hey, I was at a party and spent a whole two days eating nothing but pure crap. Everything was either full of sugar, covered in oil, or just plain out not healthy for me at all. So now I'm switching back to my Asian foods diet to make up for two days of eating crap. Ha. Serves me right but I love the food and it's not trouble. So after my crazy partying (Including Traditional Halloween/Samhain Traditions and activities) I managed to finish the next Chapter. It took a while shorter than I first thought, so hey, I'll upload it early. :3 Hope you enjoy this Chapter! Things pick up again, no Lemon for a while, but it will be in the next few Chapters (Oh really?), I promise! (Empty words Girly...)**_

* * *

_**Chapter Eight**_

"It doesn't hurt?" "Nah, not much, un. I'll live!" "But you're limping." "I'm fine Danna, really! It only hurts a bit, un!"

Sasori looked over to his partner, concerned as the blonde bomb artist limped beside him, holding his hand, gripping slightly tighter on occasions where taking a step was painful. "I can take you back to the hotel; we have some nice Hot Springs there, you can relax for a day there," Sasori spoke as Deidara looked up, shaking his head, beaming brightly. "Danna, stop worryin' about me, I'm fine!" Deidara said, leaning up and kissing Sasori on the cheek softly. "Alright, but tell me if you're hurting too bad and I'll take you right back to the Hotel Room, okay?" "If I say I'm getting horny, will you also take me back to the hotel room?" "Are you?" "No, not right now, un. Just testing." "You brat," Sasori said with a laugh, leaning down and kissing Deidara on his temple.

They had been walking around the Iwa Village for a while now, going through stores, Sasori buying Deidara some candy and watching him eat it happily, even feeding him some Cotton Candy of his own. Deidara had kept close to Sasori's side constantly, rarely moving away from the puppet master, and although he had found it annoying at first when he'd first met Deidara, now, he knew he couldn't live without hearing the soft thumping of footsteps that meant Deidara was following him.

Deidara was looking around. He'd been excited at first to go into town, although as the sun slowly started to set, he became slightly quieter and more spaced out. That happened a lot when he was back at Akatsuki, but for Deidara to act so spaced out now was a bit odd.

Sasori frowned a bit as he paused by the edge of a lake, looking out over the water, scanning the red like colour it had been dyed by the setting sun. Deidara looked up at Sasori, blinking and snapping out of his daze. "What's up Danna, un?" he asked softly as Sasori looked back at Deidara, tilting the blonde's chin up and softly kissing him. Deidara eagerly returned the kiss, eyes fluttering shut.

"You've been pretty out of it, are you okay Dei?" Sasori asked softly against Deidara's lips. Deidara smiled, nodding as he turned his head slightly, looking out over the lake. "Un... I'm fine... I'm just kinda a bit..." He trailed off, looking around, blue eyes slowly scanning over details in the lake and the trees surrounding them. Sasori blinked, tilting his head. "Kinda what Dei?"

"Not me... Things are... Unnn..." Deidara murmured softly, pausing as he looked at a particular spot in the bushes. "What is it?"

Deidara blinked, tilting his head a bit, focusing on that one spot.

"Familiar, un."

Sasori blinked a bit. Familiar? How did this place seem familiar? The only areas Deidara had seen was Akatsuki, the area directly around Akatsuki, the village close to the base, and very brief views of places where their Missions were held, but those were always in Kirigakure, Sunagakure, and other small towns close to the Base, never as far as here, like Iwagakure. How did Iwa look familiar to the blonde?

Deidara looked back at Sasori after a while, blinking and blushing. "Un, that was weird, I'm sorry... Maybe I just spaced out when seein' a painting or something, remembered it and it looks like this... I mean... People paint lakes and trees all the time, un," he said softly, looking around again. Sasori nodded, smiling gently, chuckling and softly kissed Deidara. "My little space-case," he said with a smile as Deidara blushed, smiling.

"I am not a Space-Case, un," Deidara said with a playful pout as he looked up at Sasori. The red head chuckled, gently starting to walk back in the direction that they had come from. "Let's go back to the hotel Dei, maybe you need some rest after all," he said softly as Deidara smiled, padding along beside Sasori. "Un! Okay!" he said with a smile. He was happy his Danna cared so much about him. Turning to look at the lake, he smiled softly to himself.

Perhaps he was being silly after all. Perhaps he was just thinking of a painting. Blinking, he paused as he saw something that didn't fit in the scenery. Something that didn't fit in amongst the greens, reds and blacks. A flock of greying yellow. Deidara blinked, turning his head more, peering through the bushes. "Dei?" Deidara was snapped out of it again by Sasori who had paused, looking concerned at the blonde. Deidara smiled. "Nothing, just admiring the scenes, un," he said with a smile as Sasori gave a soft sigh and a nod.

Deidara looked down, worried. That was scary... That had almost felt like they were being watched by someone in the bushes.

A small woman bent over, frail, with long greying blonde hair. Watching. Staring.

... Angry...

* * *

_Small water droplets fell to the ground. It was maddening, hearing that sound over and over again. Suffocating... Everything echoed in that room, everything sounded louder, you could hear people coming and the wait until they arrived was torture. The blonde curled into himself more, hands gripping his hair, sobbing quietly._

_Those words... They were haunting... So Scary... Footsteps started to echo closer, stomping, heavy and instantly the small shivering blonde tensed, fingers gripping his long blonde hair tightly. The footsteps slowed to a halt outside the doorway and the many locks clicked, the door kicked open harshly, the metal colliding with metal, making a loud echoing crash that caused the curled up figure to jump slightly._

_A smirk twisted its ways onto the lips of the intruder at the door, stepping in slowly. "Good morning Whore," the older man hissed, slamming the door loudly behind him as the child began to cry. The man let out a low, rumbling laugh as he stopped a metre in front of the boy. "Guess what Mummy told me... Today... Mummy told me that you had left your room..." He began as he bent down; kneeling in front of the boy, knife glinting in his hand. "Mummy said you tried to run away..."_

_The man's smirk slowly twisted into a scowl as he reached down, gripping the long blonde locks, making the boy cry out in pain as his head was jerked upwards. "YOU FILTHY UNGRATEFUL SLUT! YOU DARE TRY AND RUN AWAY!? AFTER ALL YOUR MOTHER AND I DO FOR YOU!?" he screamed as the boy sobbed, allowing himself to get continuously beaten with the handle of the knife and fist, the blade occasionally slicing pale white skin._

"_I'm sorry Daddy, un! I'm sorry!" he cried out as the man scowled bringing the blade down sharply against the child's shoulder, slicing through flesh and gouging a deep slice into the arm. The boy screamed in agony, trying to tear himself away, to move, leave... To just get the hell _out _of there! "YOU WILL BE FUCKING SORRY IN A MINUTE SLUT!" The man shouted as he threw him backwards, head slamming up against the wall with a sickening crack, blood now soaking the floor and the boy's clothing._

_There was a few moments silence until a faint zipping sound was heard and the blonde began to sob. "Please... No... I don't want to, un... I promise to be good... Not again, un... Please, not again," he begged softly in sobs as his pleas were cut off as something was forced into his mouth, making him gag. Slowly, the older man began to thrust harshly, the blonde boy sobbing as he tried to push the other away weakly, his pleas coming out in a mumble and only making the older man moan._

"_That's right slut... Come on... You know what to do..."_

_Shutting both eyes tightly, the small blonde started to comply, crying as he began to suck and lick along the older man's throbbing member, the man growling and thrusting hard and fast into the boy's mouth before releasing deep in his throat, choking the small child. He pulled out, looking down and grinned devilishly at the boy before gripping the boy's long fringe, lifting it up, gripping the knife tightly. "Now, to punish you for trying to run away..."_

_A loud, ear shattering scream filled the room as the knife was brought down sharply, slicing straight through pale white skin on the forehead and across the eyelid and cheek, slicing deep into the crystal, azure blue eye, blood mixing in with tears and the older man's semen._

"_You're never more beautiful then when you're covered in sin... Deidara..."_

Deidara screamed loudly, jolting upright, burying his face in his hands and sobbing. Sasori opened his eyes quickly, startled by the loud scream, sitting up and looking around, chakra strings ready in case there had been an attack. Although he was slightly relieved that no ANBU had found them, when he heard Deidara's sobbing he became frightened again. He moved forward, hugging Deidara tightly. "Dei? Dei what's wrong?" Sasori asked softly, kissing the blonde bomb artists neck softly as he felt the boy grip him tightly, sobbing hard.

Sasori's eyes softened. "Was it another nightmare?"

When he felt Deidara's hands grip tighter, he knew he'd guessed correctly. It had been so long since Deidara had such an intense nightmare, and it worried him. What could have triggered it? He gently shifted, moving so he was leaning against the beds head board and so that Deidara was seated comfortably in his lap, head buried in Sasori's neck as he sobbed.

"Did you want to talk about it?" Sasori asked gently, gently rubbing the blonde's back. He got a small shaking of the head as a response. Sasori sighed. Deidara never spoke of his nightmares, since day one the blonde had carried the burden on his own and refused to talk. "It's okay, remember, it's not real, you're here safe with me, that nightmare is not real," he said softly, gently rubbing Deidara's back, surprised as Deidara sobbed harder before he shudder heavily, coughing.

Sasori's frown deepened and his eyes widened. "Deidara? Deidara it's okay-" he began but was cut off when Deidara sharply pulled away, darting up and running. "DEI!?" He cried out, jumping up and following the blonde, seeing him run into the bathroom, sprinting in before he heard heavier coughing, running into the bathroom in time to see Deidara collapsed in front of the toilet bowl, throwing up.

Sasori was worried. He'd never seen Deidara get so scared by a nightmare it made him physically sick. What had happened? He moved into the room slowly, pausing behind Deidara, gathering the blonde hair and holding it up, gently rubbing the blonde's back as he threw up, sobbing still. Sasori knew this was a bit too serious to simply tell the blonde to dismiss it, he had to get him to talk, or at least hint to what had frightened him so bad to wake up screaming, in a cold sweat, sobbing and make him throw up.

After a while, Deidara seemed to calm down enough to stop throwing up, but still sat sobbing. Sasori got up, moved to the sink, grabbed a towel and gently wet it, wringing it a bit before walking back to Deidara, making the blonde lift his head and gently cleaned his face before throwing the towel in the laundry basket and moving to get a cup, filling it with water before holding it out for Deidara.

"Rinse your mouth out, that can't be a good taste," he said softly.

He waited a bit, not seeing the blonde move before sighing, gently holding the cup to the blonde's lips, tilting the water in the blonde's mouth, helping him rinse out the taste, softly patting his hair and kissing his forehead.

"Feeling slightly better?"

Deidara reached over weakly, hugging the puppet master, crying quietly now. Sasori gently picked up the blonde in his arms, Deidara wrapping his arms around Sasori's neck, wrapping his legs around his waist as he was carried back into their room and on the bed, layed down gently and then covered in the warm blankets.

Sasori looked down worriedly, gently stroking Deidara's cheek, sitting beside him, letting Deidara grip his pants tightly. "Want to talk about it now?" Deidara shook his head, hiccupping a bit and shifting closer to the red head. Sasori nodded, wiping the last of Deidara's tears from his pale cheeks.

"_What could make someone so scared to react like that?"_ he thought to himself as he slowly calmed the blonde with gently stroking the long blonde locks. He glanced up warily, scanning the walls before finding the clock, staring at it for a while. It was barely past midnight. He sighed, shaking his head before hearing a small whimper from his blonde. He looked down with a small worried frown, seeing that Deidara was asleep again. He gave a soft sigh, stroking Deidara's hair, the blonde shifting closer.

"I'm sorry, un."

The words were whispered slowly and softly, barely audible to many, but when Sasori heard it, his worry for his young lover increased. Turning to look at the desk in the corner, he summoned his chakra strings moving them to the desk and taking a pen and paper, bringing them back to him, looking down at the blank sheet of paper, beginning to write softly on it.

"_Dear Konan,_

_Another nightmare, I'm worried again. He threw up, he still won't talk but I don't want to force it out of him, it's clearly distressing him. What should I do? I wouldn't know what triggered it; he was fine until the sun set in the village and acted more spaced out than his usual blonde self. I don't want him to get sick again, please help me._

_~Sasori."_

Re-reading over his words, he frowned and scowled at himself. Pah, he sounded pathetic, but he'd rather come off sounding pathetic than uncaring or ignorant. Tying the parchment into a scroll he placed it in his lap, forming a few hand signs before watching it vanish into dark smoke. Moving and lying down properly beside Deidara, he held the blonde as he snuggled up close to the red head for what warmth the puppet body had. Looking down, Sasori closed his eyes slowly, kissing Deidara's forehead before getting comfortable.

"You'll be okay, I promise to protect you from those nightmares," he said softly, but then sighed. How? Protect him from what? This evil ghost that seemed to have been haunting Deidara his whole life. What kind of things can haunt one person for so long? What kind of thing would it be for a six year old to have found out?

"The ghost is not real Deidara... But I'll protect you from it..."

* * *

**Aaahhh, I'm sorry everyone! I gave you a lovely Lemon scene then into the drama and tears, I'm sorry~ T.T It's only downhill for the poor Artists from here, but there will be good moments for them too (Lemon too?). I just feel terrible for doing this to Deidara, but hey, it's interesting, right? Gives a bit more depth and past into the story. Well, future Chapters look into it more, and right now I'm writing some Lemon in around Chapter 12/13-ish. Can't promise too much though cause, well, exams and assignments... I have to make a game in Macromedia Flash too. Ahh, I was half tempted to create a "SasoDei Yaoi Dress Ups" Game. That would have been fun, of course, my teacher wouldn't have been too thrilled about it, so I've stuck with an "Escape the Room" type of game... (What's with the "..."? You're planning something...) Anyway, enough gabbering about my life (You have a life?? :o ), my point is, next Chapter may take up to a week, depending on how lazy I'm feeling, but still, enjoy this Chapter! :3**


	9. Chapter 9

_**Hello everyone~!!! :33 ( *Rabid Growl* TWISTED! BAD GIRL!!! Where the HELL have you been?!?) Uwa~ I'm sorry everyone, forgive the late chapter! T.T I've had assignments eating me! (Literally?) I've had my IT Assignment due soon, same with my Ancient History one (*Arm flail*) and those two have been driving me mad... I've been typing quickly with current chapters and have also started to write another story (Check out Twisted's main User Page and see what's she's writing!) so I'm trying to split my attention evenly. It's a task handling exams, assignments AND stories, but I'm fairing quite well I think! :33 (And you only have two more weeks left, right?) That's right! Two weeks and then I get TWO MONTHS HOLIDAY!!! :DD (Hey lady! Quit holding up the fans and let them read the damn story!) Oh, yeah, sorry for the long wait, anyway, here's a bit more of I Choose My Life, enjoy!**_

* * *

_**Chapter Nine**_

"Danna~!! Let's get a cold milkshake, unn~! Iwa's hot~!"

Sasori smile, nodding as he let Deidara drag him by the hand towards a cafe. Normally he would have thought about prices, as otherwise, Kakuzu would have had his little rant about wasting money... But... Seeing as the money was given _to _be spent carelessly, he couldn't care less.

In fact, he enjoyed buying the bubbly blonde teen sweets and watching him swallow them, then kiss him as a thank you, then drag him off happily somewhere else.

Ordering the drink, Sasori couldn't help but let his mind wander as the waiter went off and started to mix the chocolate with milk, ice cream and sauces. The blonde had seemed so distressed and ill the previous night, but when he had woken up and been questioned by Sasori, the bomb artist had simply stared blankly at the red head, smiled, dismissed it as nothing and went to go get dressed. Sasori had found that rather odd, especially at how petrified Deidara had been when he'd woken up, and then to dismiss it as nothing...

"There you go sir, you and your little lady enjoy that," the waiter said with a smile. Sasori chuckled as he noticed Deidara's visible eye twitch, scowl towards the waiter before taking Sasori's hand and pulling him towards a table on the veranda with a large view of the forest and desert land. A straw in each mouth, they started to drink the milkshake, Deidara chatting happily with Sasori spaced out slightly, watching the milkshake vanish quickly as Deidara consumed it.

"Danna, un?"

Sasori blinked, looking up. "Um, sorry? I was just thinking, I didn't hear what you said," he admitted softly. Deidara sighed, a look of mild exasperation on his face. "Maa Danna, un... People call _me _a space case," he said before smiling and sticking his tongue out playfully. "I'm just kiddin', un," he said as Sasori smiled, taking the straw out of his mouth. "Continue, it must have been something important to make you repeat yourself," he said with a smirk.

Deidara huffed. "Unn, everything I say is important." "Of course, of course." "Danna, you doubt me like that one more time you're not gettin' layed for a month, un." "You wouldn't do that. You're a young hormonal teenager who just had their first time and can't stop throwing in a dirty comment, gesture or movement towards me; I doubt you would last a month."

Sasori smiled as Deidara looked down, blushing heavily. Ha. He'd won. "Now, you were saying my love?" Sasori asked as he gently reached under the table, patting Deidara's thigh, making the blonde blush a bit, look up and smile. "Oh yeah, un... Could I go for a quick fly, un? I might get a bit more breeze in the air, it's really hot and I'm sweating terribly, even with the drink," Deidara said softly. Sasori nodded, smiling, taking another sip. "Just be careful, make your bird in the woods so no one sees you and don't fly directly over town, but not too far away so that I can't see you. If you can't see me, then you're too far away, I'll stay here, okay? If you see me leave, then land, okay?" Sasori said softly, glancing up at Deidara.

The blonde beamed brightly, jumping up and leaning across the table, kissing Sasori on the lips softly. "Thank you Danna, un~!" he said with a bright smile, moving away quickly, darting off towards the forest. Sasori sighed, shaking his head with a smile. "You've got a fine young girl with you there," the waiter said to him as he started to clean the other tables. Sasori smiled, nodding and chuckling. "My Dei's a fine one," he said softly, continuing to drink the chocolate drink.

"What I'd give to have someone call me 'Master.'"

Sasori blushed a bit, choosing to dismiss the comment. Deidara calling him 'Master' had completely changed from its original meaning.

He was lost in his daydreams, and slightly perverted fantasies, absently sipping his and Deidara's leftover drink when he noticed a flash across the sky. Blinking, he watched it, smiling when he saw Deidara standing atop the bird, arms spread, hair flying behind him, air licking his milky white skin. It did look cool and refreshing over there.

Turning his head, slightly irritated as he heard some noise outside, blinking. Some old woman sounded like she was having a ranting fit out there and the people of the village were trying, and failing, their attempts at calming her down. In fact, she seemed to only get more rowdy.

Sitting up slightly straighter he looked out through the door back into the cafe, looking out to the streets where an elderly woman was hunched over, struggling to make her way... Oh crap... Towards him. He wasn't in the mood to kill people to save him and Deidara, they were on a nice little vacation, it would be a shame to tell the happy blonde that they had to leave early because an old woman made him react violently.

If anything, that would displease Deidara. He could picture the conversation now.

"_You _killed_ an _old woman_, un!!" "She attacked me!" "A SENILE OLD WOMAN, UN! YOU KILLED HER!!"_

Yeah, that was a conversation he wanted to avoid, it would be hard to explain.

"SMOKE! DON'T YOU SEE IT!? SMOKE!" Sasori frowned at the woman's shouts, turning his head more as he watched her force her way through the cafe, practically sprinting onto the balcony and leaning over the edge of the rails, staring in the direction of the woods.

Sasori's heart began to race. Smoke in the direction of the woods. He turned his head sharply, red hair fluttering in the light breeze as he stared at a small trail of white smoke trailing up from the woods. _"Deidara made his bird there, people noticed,"_ he thought worriedly.

"Smoke!! Sign of the devil! Sign of the devil!" the woman rambled, her face twitching occasionally. Sasori knew this woman was mad, insane, absolutely crazy. Whatever phrasing, she was definitely not mentally stable.

The woman screeched, pointing into the sky suddenly, hands trembling. "Witch! Witch! That slutty whore has come back to kill us all!" She cried out, turning and spotting Sasori, moving to him quickly, grabbing the edge of his shirt. "Smell it Sir? An evil smell? Smoke that comes from the mouth of hell! Set it on fire! Set it on fire!" she practically shouted at him, waving a finger at the sky. Sasori instantly jumped up, taking a step backwards, the milkshake glass fallen to the floor, shattering on the wooden panels, the remaining chocolate drink spilling everywhere, seeping through the cracks. He looked up at where the woman was pointing. What was she-?

Deidara.

His heart was beating heavily in his chest as he stared in shock, watching Deidara's bird swirl in the skies.

"There! There! Somebody! Somebody look up there! Didn't I tell you? Smell that air! Set it on fire!" she cried out as she shuffled forward, grabbing Sasori's shirt front tightly, leaning close, wrinkles, dirt and sores clearly visible on her pale slightly sun kissed skin, hair that was probably once a blonde colour was now greying, frayed and tangled, hanging untidily around her face, reaching down to her waist. "Quick sir run and tell, before you fall for the witches spell! There it is! There it is! Smell that horrid smell! Tell it to the people, Shinobi, ANBU as well! Please! Set it on fire!" she screamed as the owner of the store ran in, grabbing her arm, pulling her backwards from the shocked red head who quickly took some steps back, staring at the woman as she was dragged away slowly, the manager muttering soft words to her as she continued to screech.

The waiter came out; having been hidden behind the counter before, walking slowly to Sasori, a glass of water in his hands which Sasori took gratefully. "Who is she?" Sasori asked softly as he took quick sips of the water, muddy brown eyes keeping a firm fix on Deidara and the bird.

The waiter sighed. "She's loopy, don't worry about her. She's had this crazy dream for years ever since she lost her child," the waiter muttered. Sasori paused, raising an eyebrow, turning to look at the waiter. "A crazy dream?" he asked. The waiter nodded absently, looking at the shattered glass on the ground. "Yeah, that her child, who I don't even think existed, was taken and now he haunts her and watches her, flying some giant bird," the waiter said, waving his hand dismissively as he walked over, bending down and started to pick up fragments of shattered glass.

Sasori stared at the man. They had to leave; he'd make it up to Deidara later, perhaps even find a new place for a vacation instead, but this place was now dangerous. Swallowing, he looked down, hearing the woman still screaming. "So where did she get this idea from? I mean, you said you don't think a child existed, so, where's she getting this idea from?" Sasori asked slowly, taking another sip of the drink.

The waiter shrugged, placing the glass shards into his apron. "Rumour's lead me to believe that it's a lie. What people say was that she and her husband, well, they loved each other. She was the most beautiful woman in the whole of Iwa, the most beautiful golden hair and stunning blue eyes you'd ever seen. A man fell in love with her, they got married and had a child," the waiter paused, looking up at Sasori. "Here's where things get iffy," he said softly as he stood up, wiping his hands on the apron carefully so as to not cut himself.

"When the child was born, he gained a rare Kekkei Genkai, a blood trait the woman's sister had. Now, she was never close with her sister, this kid's aunt ended up dying in battle, but when the mother found the same bloodline in her first and only son, well, she was devastated. She wanted them gone, her husband hated them too, thinking his son wouldn't grow up handsome and powerful, so, they beat him, tortured him mentally and physically... Horrible things. When I was a young kid I'd hear screaming sometimes, but the village dismissed it because there was quite a fight going on back then, it wasn't uncommon to hear people dying, and no one believed that people, especially those two, would do that to their son."

Sasori stared in shock. "A... A Kekkei Genkai?" The waiter nodded, moving through and dumping the glass in the bin, picking up a dustpan and brush. The waiter gave another nod. "Yeah, but it's been dead since long ago, not to mention it's kinda outrageous, even for a Ninjutsu Blood Line," he said with a chuckle. Sasori swallowed.

"What was it?"

The Waiter looked up, smiling before looking away, brushing the remainder of the glass into the dustpan.

"Apparently... The kid was born with mouths on his hands."

* * *

"We're leaving." "D-Danna? Why? Eh! Danna, un!"

Sasori had sprinted from the cafe as fast as possible and had run straight into the forest where Deidara had just barely landed, only to be dragged off the bird and started to be pulled away, really stunned, especially when the first words out of Sasori's mouth was _'We're leaving'_.

"Danna! Please! Tell me what happened, un!" Deidara begged softly, stumbling a bit as Sasori dragged him by his wrist. Sasori kept his lips set in a line, refusing to say anything. Stupid Konan. Had she forgotten or was this a prank? Or something more...? A test by Pein perhaps? Go figure if that was it, sending Deidara back to his home country.

How the hell was Sasori to know he was from Iwa?! Or perhaps he was making assumptions, perhaps other kids had mouths on their hands, perhaps the waiter was a kid way before Deidara was born and some other poor child had been tortured senseless. As cruel as it was, he hoped that another child was the victim of Child Abuse and not his Deidara.

Feeling the wrist he was clinging to torn from his grasp, he blinked, turning and frowning. Deidara stood, panting slightly with the effort to keep up with his Danna, staring at him with a light frown. "Why are we leaving? I like it here, un. It's pretty," he said softly as Sasori frowned, shaking his head. "We'll find someplace else pretty Dei, come on, let's leave," he said as he made to take Deidara's wrist again, only to have the blonde step back. "Danna, I'm not a baby, un!" "I raised you and I remember you as practically a baby now stop pouting like one and let's get the hell out of here!"

"Not until I get some answers, un! I'm sixteen and deserve to know why we suddenly have the need to evacuate a village on a _vacation_, un!" Deidara said, crossing his arms over his chest.

Sasori was getting desperate now, that woman must have suspected he knew Deidara, she'd eyed him and started to limp after him so he'd had to basically sprint to the forest, but even so he could feel her chakra steadily growing closer.

"Deidara, there's a potentially dangerous woman here, and possibly a man too, we have to get out of here," he said softly as Deidara's frown relaxed slightly. "So, someone's trying to track us?" "Yes! Yes Dei! That's why we need to leave!" "So... What do they want, un?"

Sasori swallowed, looking down. "I have something really precious and they want to take it and destroy it, I can't risk it so we have to go back to the hotel, grab our things and leave," he spoke, looking up at Deidara. Deidara stared at Sasori before nodding slowly and uncrossing his arms. "What do they want, un?" "Dei! Now's not the _time _to be doing this, let's just leave! Why do you want to stay in this stupid village anyway?!" "It's not stupid, un! And I'm trying to remember something and it's hard because I forgot it long ago, un... But this place is triggering the memory," Deidara spoke softly. Sasori's heart ceased.

Triggering memories? Something forgotten? Waking up screaming? Torture? Child with mouths on his hands?

The chakra signature in the same woods, slowly stalking prey.

"Deidara. Now. I am deadly serious unless you are willing to die, we are leaving now," Sasori spoke, voice starting to quiver. He was petrified for his blonde, who knew what could happen if that woman got a hold of him, or even if he saw her. He had never seen Deidara kill anyone, he knew the blonde had only once when he was to obtain a scroll and nearly died in the process, but never with his own eyes had he seen Deidara kill someone, but perhaps if he saw the woman it would be a first?

Calm smiling Deidara turned cold blooded murderer.

Deidara though finally gave in with a nod, walking forward and taking Sasori's hand as Sasori smiled, turning and started to sprint again, Deidara running along side of him. _"Whatever made Danna so worried that we have to leave, can't be good... But... I want to know what this 'Precious' thing is... Jewels? A scroll for a powerful Jutsu?" _Deidara shook his head nearly falling flat on his face when Sasori sharply stopped, gripping his hand tightly and causing him to stop. With a squeak he stumbled backwards lightly, only to be caught and held by Sasori.

"Danna? Wha--" Sasori quickly clapped a hand over Deidara's mouth. Right ahead, slowly returning to her cottage. That woman was right there. Deidara frowned, looking upwards to try and see Sasori before frowning, looking around, eyes darting from tree to tree. Was it an ANBU Squad? A Shinobi? Who was it? "Deidara. When I say run... Get to the hotel, hide and lock everything. Do you understand?" Sasori softly whispered into Deidara's ear. The blonde blinked, nodding slightly. But what about Sasori? What was he going to do?

Deidara knew his Master was powerful, but to take on, well, whatever this was, on his own... He didn't want to risk it.

Sasori slowly let his hand drop as Deidara took in quiet but deep breathes. "Da-" "Quiet, she's there," Sasori hissed softly, keeping the blonde close and pressed up against him, and even though the situation was slightly frightening, it still made Deidara blush being pressed up against Sasori like that.

Slowly letting go, Sasori crouched down a bit, giving a small nod to Deidara. The blonde blinked, looking down as Sasori looked up, nudging his head in the direction of the hotel. "Run," he breathed. Deidara hesitated, looking down worriedly and fearfully as there was a loud cackle. "My little witch! I've found you~!" Deidara's heart beat heavily as Sasori swallowed, running into a bush. "Run! Hide!" Sasori hissed as Deidara looked around, jumping up into a tree and burying himself in the leaves.

"No good hiding I saw you! I have you now! I have you! Time to burn! BURN WITCH BURN!"

* * *

**_There we are! Ooh~ Cliff hanger! Damn. I hate leaving everyone on a tense moment. Eep. (But you'll update soon right? ... Right???) Yeah! I'll do my best to! I'm nearly done typing up the next chapter as well, so, Chapter Ten will hopefully be out soon too! I want to thank everyone who's reviewed so far! I really do love it! Makes me happy that my story's making others happy and that they're enjoying it too! :3 Reviews are always loved, yeah! Wish me luck for my upcoming exams and also give me a bit of a nudge forward to keep updating you nice and fast! Happy readings and thanks for sticking with the story and reading this much~!!_**


	10. Chapter 10

**_Hey~ Guess what? :3 (What?) Guess! (What is it?!) This is so cool! X3 (Jashin-Damn it! Tell us Twisted!!!) I'm on two Months Holiday!!!!!!! (Still no excusefor uploading the Chapter so late...) Which means, I get more time to write, which means you get more chapters faster! 8D (o.O OMG! YES!) That's right, all of my exams are done, all of my assignments, and I've gotten most of the results back, and I'm quite happy, thank you so much to all of you that wished me luck! I did an amazing job! (Shut up! You're not meant to have a life! You're a Yaoi fangirl! Talk more about the story!!!) Alright, I know you're not here to read my rants, but here to read the Yaoi :3 This Chapter's a bit more intense, added a bit more action, drama and, well, read on and find out! :3 I hope you enjoy it again! I want to say thank you to EVERYONE who has reviewed, added my story to favourites, added ME to favourites! (Yeah, THAT was a surprise for an amateur writer...) I really do appreciate everything! :3 Anyway, without further adieu, here is I Choose My Life, Chapter TEN~_**

* * *

_**Chapter Ten**_

All Sasori could do was watch helplessly. Deidara hadn't run away. Why?! Hadn't he told the blonde to run and hide!? At this rate, he'd see her! He couldn't let that happen. Now, he was sure of the nightmares, now he knew exactly what Deidara had been hiding, he knew what he was suffering with, and he knew that people's sanity usually doesn't last too long that way.

The woman was coming, from his position in the bush, he could see her getting steadily closer, and a few steps behind her was a tall gruff man, unshaved with messy blonde hair and his wary blue eyes staring around, a knife gripped tightly in his hand. Shit, so not only was there two of them, but one was armed. Glancing up, he tried to spot Deidara in the tree with no success. He was either hidden very well or had run away.

"Come here little witch! Time to burn!" the woman cackled as she drew closer and closer, now in full view with the man. He heard a choked strangled type of gasp come from the tree, and he knew Deidara had seen them. A shuffle, even panic like movement was heard and he knew Deidara was on the run. The couple heard too, turning as the man smirked, laughing and pulling out some shuriken. "HELLO SLUT!" he screamed, throwing them sharply. Sasori only could plead that it didn't hit its target, but only felt the fear grow when he heard a strangled yelp and a thud.

He stood up, throwing several kunai towards the two, only to have the man block them. The woman cackled. "See! See! I told you... Red as blood... With the slut... The Witch has her demon... Seduction... Kill... KILL THEM BOTH!" the woman screamed as Sasori looked at the man with a poisonous glare.

"I see you're the one in possession of my slut right now... How is she?" the man smirked as Sasori scowled deeply. "Deidara is not a slut, not a girl, and he never has been, or is, yours," he spat darkly, slowly starting to side-step his way closer to the tree he'd seen the shuriken aimed and thrown at. The man chuckled darkly. "Is that so Red? How would you know this? Has my little slut been whoring out to you so you know the bitch is a boy?" the man spoke with a smirk. Sasori scowled. "He has not been whoring himself out," he growled. He hated this and wanted to stop the conversation, but anything was good to stall for time so he could get Deidara and vanish.

He glanced quickly to the side, seeing a glimmer of blonde strings and a very faint flash of red. He had to force himself not to go mental and slaughter the two and rush to _his _Deidara and hold him, see if he was okay.

"How is the bitch? She good as I remember?" "Fuck you old man." "Oh, temper, temper Red... Why are you defending the slut? Come on, give her back, it was your stupid organisation who took my property, now give it back!"

Sasori's eyes widened in fury. These were...

"How dare you... It was you... You're the one who's been tormenting Deidara all these years..." Sasori scowled, taking a step forward. "D-Daa..." "YOU were the ones haunting his nightmares and scaring him enough to make him _sick _at the memories!" "D-Danna..." "You were the FILTHY pieces of SHIT that nearly drove MY Dei to fucking INSANITY and near DEATH!" Sasori by then was practically screaming. He knew he wasn't being his normal calm self, he knew he was possibly reacting the wrong way, but at the time, he couldn't give a fuck. These two... These two bitches were the things that had scarred Deidara physically and mentally... And now...

"You're going to pay dearly," Sasori scowled as he darted forward, eyes flashing in fury as his stomach coil unwound and speared forward at lightning speed, poison dripping off the edges, thousands of Shinobi needles being summoned and ready to aim and pierce and kill when--

"DANNA! STOP!!!"

Sasori froze, needles hanging high in the air, the deadly scorpion tail frozen barely centimetres away from the couple's throats as Sasori's head snapped to look at the trembling form of Deidara. Blood was seeping down his right cheek where a slice was, and some of his hair had been cut on the side but nothing obvious. Tears were running down his chalk white face and there was a slight trace of vomit on his shirt. And he was trembling visibly, even from this distance.

Sasori relaxed slightly, looking at Deidara as he shook his head. "P-Please... Don't kill them, un..." Deidara begged softly; face down, blonde hair hanging around his face, slowly obscuring it from view. "Deidara... Let me, then you won't have to-" "No... Danna... Don't kill them... I-I'm here because of them, un... How... How could I be so ungrateful as... As to wish death to... To Mummy and Daddy, un?"

Sasori stared in disbelief. After everything they'd done to him, Deidara was protecting them now?? "This is the 'Dangerous People' right, un? And... I'm this 'Precious' Item you have, un... You... You knew about them..." "Dei, I only found out a while ago which is why I tried to get us to leave now!" "Who? Who told you, un?" "Dei! Now's not the time, just let me kill them!"

"I said _no _Danna, un!"

Sasori blinked, staring at Deidara as the blonde coughed, shuddering, knees trembling so badly that they were threatening to give out beneath him. "Deidara, we're leaving now, start to go back to the hotel, fly, I don't care, just go now," Sasori said softly. He could almost clearly see the string of sanity snapping in the blonde's bright blue eyes, the things he'd been holding onto to stay alive, the last threads of sanity... Deidara was losing it before his eyes. "Come on Slut, come back to your home with loving Mummy and Daddy, like the good little whore you are... And then... We can play... Just like we used to," he said with a smirk as Deidara's knees gave out beneath him, falling on his hands and knees, throwing up again as the man laughed, Sasori throwing a violent punch that connected to the blonde man's jaw before running to Deidara, holding his hair back.

"Dei, it'll be okay, it'll be okay, they won't touch you ever again, I promise, you're safe, you're safe from them, you have me to protect you, it's okay," Sasori soothed, rubbing the blonde's back. He had no choice, he'd have to carry the blonde away forcefully, he couldn't move and seemed too petrified by these two to run.

The woman smirked, cackling. "Come on Dear Witch, let's go home, you can bring pet Red home with you," she hissed as she took steps forward. She then paused, staring at Deidara as if inspecting him, staring over the trembling hunched over figure, gasping for air and trying to spit the taste of vomit out of his mouth.

"My... You're so... Filthy... You're going to need to have a nice _hot_ bath when we get home."

Deidara screamed, violently pushing himself up and away, sobbing hard, gripping his hair tightly. "Dei-" "NO! NO MORE, UN!! I WON'T GO BACK! I WON'T! NEVER! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU BOTH, UN! I HOPE YOU DIE! GO TO HELL AND DIE, UN!" Deidara screamed at the two, shocking even Sasori. A violent reaction, this was going downhill.

The woman though found this amusing as she stepped forward. "Go to hell? No... YOU'RE the one going to hell! Perishing and burning Witch! Evil SLUT!" the woman screeched as the man stumbled forward. He'd been dazed and had fallen to the ground but had now found the strength enough to get up, but it was clear his cheekbone was completely shattered and he was spitting out large amounts of blood.

Deidara scowled. "I swear on my grave... I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU TWO, UN!" The woman laughed. "Kill us!? HERE WE STAND! DO YOUR BEST LITTLE SLUT!" The woman shouted as the couple laughed.

Not even Sasori could predict how much blood fell at that time. Even many years later no one but Deidara would understand what drove him to explode such bloodshed with his bare hands. All Sasori could really do was watch as his gentle, calm, happy and peace loving blonde tore, punched and _destroyed _the bodies before him, blood splattering everywhere. The grass became red, nearby trees had droplets of blood, the blonde hair was stained a deep red at the tips and his front, face and hands was soaked with blood.

Deidara had been crying, yes, but for a different reason to fear and regret. Sasori could have almost sworn that he had been enjoying the murder. His first ever vicious and truly _blood thirsty _murder.

It was when Deidara had pummelled the bodies to completely unrecognisable states that Sasori had to step in, moving forward and gently placing a hand on Deidara's shoulder, which the blonde ignored, continuing to punch the mash that was once the head of his father, sobbing. "Dei... It's over, they're dead," he said softly as Deidara shook his head, punches becoming weaker and slower, sobbing. "Dei," Sasori spoke as he grabbed the blonde's wrist and hand once it was raised to throw another punch.

"It's over."

Sasori gently placed his arms around Deidara's waist, gently pulling him back and upwards into a standing position, letting go, only to feel the blonde falling, gasping and taking a hold of him again, lifting him up bridal style, letting Deidara sob heavily against his chest, clinging to the red head's shirt for dear life, ignoring the fact that it was getting soaked in blood.

Sasori quickly glanced at the bloody mess one last time before turning, darting off towards the hotel. He couldn't risk leaving Deidara on his own but he wanted to avoid suspicion when the people in Iwa discovered the bloodied mess Deidara had created. Entering through the window of their room, he placed Deidara down on the bed, quickly gathering their things, throwing them into a bag before returning to his lover's side who was still sobbing on the bed.

"Deidara, talk. I know you've been hiding this, talk to me... Please, I can make it better, don't force yourself to suffer alone," he said softly as he leaned down, moving the blonde fringe from Deidara's eyes. Deidara only shook his head, trembling and gasping in air from his sobs.

Sasori looked down, deciding to wash the blood from the blonde, which certainly wasn't helping with the bomb artist's slight phobia of blood. Gently turning the blonde, he lifted him up, carrying him bridal style to the bathroom, sitting him on the sink while he fiddled with the taps and started to fill the large bathtub. Turning, he started to undress Deidara, said bomb artist not taking mind to it and allowing his Master to strip him. When all of the clothes were off, Sasori rolled up his sleeves, feeling the water before turning and helping Deidara into the bath where he leaned against the edges.

Gently cleaning the skin, he placed soft tender kisses on the back of Deidara's hand as he held it. He was confused. Every time he leant in to give Deidara kiss on the lips, the blonde would turn his head away, refusing it and mumbling an apology with a slightly hoarse voice.

He had to rinse the bath water a few times as the water dyed red quite frequently and it was quite a while before it was once again clear. Sasori was giving Deidara's hair a final rinse, gently rubbing the blonde locks with his fingers, rinsing out the sweet smelling shampoo the blonde used. Deidara was leaning up comfortably against the bathtub head resting on the edge and breathing slightly easier. He'd gone into a deep trance that was like sleep almost, although he occasionally let out a soft moan if Sasori moved his hands a certain way.

Sasori put that to memory, but not to use at that time.

Finishing up, he gently moved Deidara out, draining the water as he dried the now fast asleep teen. Re-dressing him in something cool Sasori lifted him up gently again before moving him to the bed and softly kissing his cheek. If Deidara didn't want him kissing his lips, then he'd have to bear with it for a while.

Sitting beside Deidara, he watching him for a while before hearing a soft crackling noise. Looking up, he saw a soft silhouette forming and he merely blinked. "We got your message... Is everything okay there?" Konan's voice sounded as her figure became more prominent and features were soon visible. Sasori frowned. "You took your time replying." "We had to check that this place wasn't bugged and that we wouldn't get caught." "Hn." Konan's image blinked, looking down at Deidara and smiled. "Exhausted already? So, confess, is he still a virgin or have you taken him?" Sasori frowned. "Yes, exhausted, murder takes a lot out of you, especially when it's your parents, and no, he's not a Virgin anymore, both my doing but apparently someone else got to him before me," Sasori spoke softly, rather angry.

Konan blinked, shocked. "Murder? Parents? What do you mean? And by someone else before you, are you saying he slept with someone else, or--" "Konan, don't act fucking dumb, you know perhaps better than I do that he was raped," he scowled before pausing, sighing.

"We met up with his parents again... I found them accidentally. We were having a milkshake and it was getting too hot, so he went for a fly too... His mother found him in the sky, she's crazy, and I thought that would be a good point to leave so we started to head back, but then... Both of them... Father too... They found us and they wanted Deidara back." He paused, looking down before anger bubbled up again.

"They were horrible, calling Deidara filthy names. Witch. Slut. Whore... And I guess after his father talked... I figured it out... I figured out what it is Dei dreams of, I figured out what scared him so much, I realised why he hates blood and death and pain... I know everything he's ever done has a link, and I know him perfectly now," Sasori spoke, glaring at a spot on the pillow.

"His parents tortured him."

Konan looked down saddened. "But Deidara's okay now, we raised him nicely and he was very happy," she said softly. "He forced himself to smile, you saw what happened when he stopped, he became depressed... He became _suicidal _for god's sake," Sasori spat as he turned to glare at Konan's guilty face, and then, another thought struck him.

"You knew the whole time... You and Pein knew... Yet you did nothing to help him."

Konan looked up, tears in her eyes. "We were only looking out for everyone's best interest, we couldn't do anything, he refused help all the time," she said softly. Sasori turned his angry glare from Konan to look at Deidara's slightly pained sleeping face. "And when Pein tortured him when he was 'Bad'... He... He made Itachi show him those memories again??"

Konan looked away, tears now streaming down her face. Sasori's rage hit a high peak. "Do you know how much he has suffered? Do you know what I've heard him mumble in his sleep all the time? If I'd have heard a god damn fucking _name _I would have probably completely refused to come here! Why didn't someone _tell _me he was from Iwa?"

Konan shook her head. "Please, Sasori, try to understand, it was his wish to keep it quiet, when he was just brought to Akatsuki and regained consciousness he was so scared, and he withdrew, he was so innocent and broken but he begged us not to be hurt him, when we told him we'd taken him away from there forever he seemed so relieved, and we couldn't tell you... At the time you didn't care, you didn't want him and kept calling him a Brat! How could we tell you that his only family in Iwa nearly tortured him to death! You would have instantly gone there and dropped him off!"

Sasori was silent, glaring at the same spot before looking at the blonde and sighing, shaking his head and leant down, kissing his forehead tenderly. "I'll talk to him when he wakes up, he fainted in the bath tub after I was washing the blood off him," he said softly, voice now sounding wary and worried. Konan blinked. "So he killed them? His parents?" Sasori nodded and Konan bit her lip uncomfortably. "I never thought he'd actually kill someone," she said softly.

"Neither did I... But... What I want to know is what to do with him when he gets sick, I know now why he threw up when he woke up, but, what do I do?"

"Bring him home, we're going to need to keep him in a safe environment until we can safely stabilise his mind," she said softly. Sasori nodded softly, standing and quickly stood, packing some of things as Konan watched Deidara, her silhouette moving forward. She couldn't stand the depressive silence, but she knew if she became light hearted, Sasori would become angry and accuse her of not taking the problem seriously enough. Although, she didn't need to worry about breaking the tension and being scowled at... As...

"Unnn... Dannaaaaa..."

Konan blushed slightly, biting her lip as Sasori looked up, slightly red in the face as he coughed awkwardly. "But... Um... No... He... He lost his Virginity willingly too..." Sasori mumbled awkwardly as he stood up, walking over to Deidara and bending down, stroking the blonde boy's cheek, brushing some hair from his face. Konan smiled and laughed. "So cruel, taking advantage of a young hormonal boy," she teased as Sasori frowned. "I did not take advantage of him, we practically came in the room and he started begging me for sex. He's of age and healthy and I couldn't resist, I have needs too," he said softly as he gently ran his hand down Deidara's chest, watching the boy arch into his touch, whimpering softly.

He smiled, looking up at Konan. "I think he just needs some closure with that house and then I'll bring him home, okay? Have something nice ready in a day or two, I still want to take advantage of this hotel," he said softly as he crawled onto the bed beside Deidara, looking down at the blonde as he traced soft patterns into the milky white skin of his arm.

Konan frowned, blushing. "I thought you said he was petrified, how is he moaning your name now!?" "He fell asleep while I was washing his hair." "So??" "He has sensitive hair. He gets aroused by it."

Konan blinked again, nodding. "Oh..." she mumbled softly. Sasori turned slightly, leaning down and gently kissed Deidara's neck a few times, rubbing his side as he started to slowly wake the blonde. As regretful as he was to wake the blonde from his sweet dreams, it was best for the both of them if those dreams were stopped. "I'll leave you two alone then, I'll be waiting for you two when you get home," Konan spoke softly as she turned, looking away. Sasori gave a nod, looking up and watched her silhouette slowly vanish.

When he was sure she was gone he lowered his hand, gently kissing Deidara's cheek and felt the blonde stir, the blue eyes slowly opening. Sasori gave a gentle smile, stroking the blonde's cheek. He'd already packed all of their things, and he was ready to leave whenever Deidara was. "Dei, we're going to go home to Akatsuki, okay? Did you want to leave early?" he asked softly as Deidara sat up, rubbing his eyes. "Unn? Leaving? Why Danna, un?" he asked softly as he looked up at Sasori. Sasori sighed, shaking his head and smiled. "You're a little brat; we're leaving because I was scared for you. You gave me a heart attack before, and my heart being one of the only real whole human parts left in me, that's not good," Sasori said with a small chuckle.

Deidara blinked, looking down guiltily. Sasori looked surprised before leaning forward and kissing Deidara on the cheek again softly. "Listen, we're going to go back to that house, the one you used to live in before Akatsuki, and you can do whatever, just get closure, okay? Do whatever you need to do there, just so long as you feel happy again, so you don't have these nightmares anymore. I know they won't automatically go away, but this will help," Sasori said softly, gently brushing the butter blonde fringe from Deidara's face. Deidara looked uncertain of himself before looking up at Sasori with a slight blush.

"I'm scared to go back, un," he admitted softly as Sasori gently kissed his cheek and down his jaw line to his neck. "I know, but then things will get a lot better, okay?" Sasori said softly as Deidara looked at Sasori and hugged him gently. "Promise, un?" "I promise Dei."

Deidara gave a soft smile before turning and hugging Sasori. "We can leave as soon as you want to go to the house, but we don't have to go back to Akatsuki for another four days, so we have plenty of time to stay here if you want," Sasori said softly as Deidara nodded. "L-Let's go soon, un," Deidara said softly. "Soon? How soon?" "As soon as I... Umm..." Deidara blushed and looked away as Sasori blinked. "What's wrong?" "I'm going to go to the bathroom, un, I'll be back soon," Deidara said softly, turning his legs and starting to stand, keeping his back to Sasori before the red head blinked, smirking and took a hold of Deidara's wrist.

"You're too tired and you'll be too exhausted on your walk back, let me take care of it," Sasori purred softly, making Deidara shiver and turn, looking back at Sasori before nodding, walking forward and sitting on the bed again, his pants tented slightly from the erotic dream he had been having.

Sasori gently pushed Deidara onto his back, kissing his neck softly as he moved his hand into the blonde's pants and took a hold of his member making Deidara moan softly. "Get some sleep, and no dirty dreams of us or I too might need to get rid of an erection," Sasori said softly as Deidara nodded obediently, eyes half lidded with lust.

Slowly, Sasori started to massage the hot flesh in his hands, pumping his hand slowly up and down the hardening shaft as Deidara arched his back, moaning softly. Sasori merely watched Deidara's expression, watching the small thin body arch and tremble, the pale hands clench and unclench the sheets, red plump lips parted in a soft gasp as the soft voice moaned out in pleasure, bright azure blue eyes hidden behind the eyelids as he kept his eyes shut tight in pleasure, golden hair spread out around his head like a halo, an adorable red blush spread across his cheeks. Sasori loved it, every single inch of him.

Soon his pumping became faster and slightly harsher and Deidara's back arched higher, whines and moans of pleasure escaping his lips. Sasori leant down, kissing Deidara's neck softly on the small hickey's he'd made the previous night as his other hand reached out to the bedside drawer, pulling out some tissues. He knew Deidara would hate it if he had to change pants or have a bath again, so he'd have these ready.

Hearing Deidara loud, high pitch whine and back arching high Sasori moved his hand nice and hard and fast along Deidara's member. "A-AH! D-Dannaaaaa!" Deidara cried out, his head resting to the side, blonde fringe out of the way. "I-I'm gonna... Unnn!" He moaned out, panting hard as Sasori moved the tissues down, nodding. "Cum for me Dei," he breathed out softly, gently nipping at the others earlobe before feeling Deidara arch and cry out as he came into the tissues, body going limp, panting hard.

Sasori looked up at Deidara's face, kissing his cheek lovingly before pulling away, resting his forehead on Deidara's. "No more sexual dreams, okay? Next time I might need relief too," Sasori spoke softly to Deidara, the blonde nodding, panting hard.

Sasori leant back, lying down beside Deidara after throwing the tissue into the bin, wrapping an arm protectively around Deidara's waist. "Good night," he spoke softly as he leant in, hoping to perhaps kiss Deidara on the lips, but found his own against Deidara's hand and pulled back, looking down with slight sadness at Deidara, a strong pain in the blonde's eyes. "Please... Not now Danna... I'm sorry, un," he said softly as Sasori smiled and nodded. "I understand."

It hurt, but he'd have to live without Deidara's lips and soft kisses for a while. Watching the blonde move closer and cuddle him before falling asleep, Sasori wondered how deep the torture had gone. If Deidara hadn't initially stopped him and then done the job himself, Sasori would have become brutal to the two who had caused Deidara such fear and torment in his life.

Looking down at Deidara sadly, he stroked the blonde's cheek, eyes lowering. The bomb artist had shown no remorse or hesitation to tear his own parents to shreds and beyond. The very people that had given him life, and he acted as if it were some game! No, he didn't even act that way in games that Kisame and Hidan would play years ago, even in the virtual realms Deidara would apologise or get teary if he killed someone on accident. Deidara's hands were now stained forever. And only one sad thought floated and engraved into Sasori's mind.

"_Deidara... You've become a murderer..."_

* * *

**_Uwa~ Scary... Who here guessed Deidara was gonna be violent and snap? Actually, this is about Half Way for my story (WHAT?!?!) Yeah, I intend to only write about Twenty Chapters at the most, or try to, I don't want to drown you all in so many Chapters and pointless things you get bored, but I want to try and use part of the actual Naruto plot in I Choose My Life as well. Not the whole plot, just some small bits and pieces, then twist it to suit my needs (Lol!) So, where do you think this story is heading? Happy Ending? Sad Ending? Anything you think might happen, anything you WANT to happen? You've got about ten Chapters to tell me your thoughts, and soon I'll have a little segment either expressing your thoughts, or even answering questions if you have any. If you don't want your question up, then I can keep it anonymous or not put it up at all :3 It's going to get really fast beat soon (Eventually) and the last few Chapters I guarantee will draw some emotions from you. Not telling you which! That'd be a spoiler! You'll just have to wait! Anyway, there's my little rant of doom done for now, Reviews are loved, or if you want to send a question/plot idea/plot twist/guess the plot and have it remain anonymous, drop me a PM! Some plot twists will be kept quiet, yeah, but I can try and satisfy you even a little :3 Until then, see you for now! _**


	11. Chapter 11

_**Hello~! Yep! That's right, I'm back with a brand new Chapter of I Choose My Life, Chapter 11!!!! (About bloody time -.-'' ) Well I'm not quite sure what to say, I'm pretty happy with how this story has come so far, and from here on out I'm going to try and make it a bit more exciting each chapter, a bit of action. Someone's asked me how many more Lemons there will be? I'll try to make it at least two more, perhaps three if I can squeeze it in somewhere... Next Chapter will definetely have some Lemon for you all, so there's a warning~ (Enough talking!) Anyway, thank you ALL so very much for all the lovely reviews, for adding my story and for enjoying reading this! 8D I'm really happy right now!! :33 Anyway, here it is, I Choose My Life Chapter 11!!!**_

* * *

_**Chapter Eleven**_

The weather was perfect for the mood that filled the two artists. The storm clouds were out and it was lightly drizzling, the night sky was hidden by the thick black clouds, not allowing any light to pass through into the dark forest. The only time the ground, trees and small house was lit up was by a thunderclap or lightning.

Sasori looked down slightly at Deidara who stood beside him; chalk white in colour, usually vibrant blue eyes a dull blue-grey hue, deadly still and staring. Simply staring ahead of him. It had been almost ten years since he'd seen the torture home. Ten years. And now to visit the place that stalked his nightmares, Sasori knew this was pure terror to the young blonde. Clutching the umbrella slightly tighter, Sasori swallowed, looking at the small cottage again, the lightning reflecting the broken and shattered appearance and smears of red on the ground behind some trees. So they were close after all. Glancing to his right, he blinked as he stared at the lake.

"_You've been pretty out of it, are you okay Dei?" _

"_Un... I'm fine... I'm just kinda a bit..." _

"_Kinda what Dei?"_

"_Not me... Things are... Unnn..." _

"_What is it?"_

Of course... It made more sense now.

"_Familiar, un."_

That's where they had been standing nearly two days ago... Deidara had recognised the area. With a frown, Sasori turned to look at the blonde, placing a hand on his shoulder, feeling how tense the boy was. "Are you ready?" Sasori asked softly as Deidara swallowed hard and nodded shakily. "Did you want me to come in with you?" He asked as Deidara looked up at Sasori, a determined look in his eye as he frowned. "No, un... I don't want to show you my past, un... Please stay here," Deidara said softly as Sasori nodded.

He didn't want to let the blonde go in on his own, but if there were any signs of trouble, he'd going in quickly and help him out and run.

Deidara turned back to the house, swallowing. "Just... Just give me half an hour, then..." "Come and get you?" "There's nothing in there, un... Just memories... They can't hurt me." Sasori nodded. The boy had logic, that was for sure. "But if there's a trap-" "I know where they are... The traps were set up for me, un... I know where they are, otherwise, I wouldn't be alive still," Deidara spoke softly. Sasori gave a grim nod, gently rubbing Deidara's back.

"Do what you have to do, and come back safe."

"Yes Sasori no Danna, un."

Sasori watched as Deidara strode out from under the umbrella, walking slowly towards the house, raindrops landing on his white skin and golden hair, dripping downwards. With a sigh, Sasori looked away as the doorknob twisted and Deidara vanished into the dark house, the door closing behind him with a loud creak.

"Deidara... You're one brave kid," he murmured softly as he looked back up at the dark house, the only thing he had to do now was to wait for his blonde's safe return.

* * *

Soft creaks echoed around him, dust rising slightly with each footstep, not helping to ease the young blonde's nerves in the house. Everything seemed exactly the same. Looking around, the mouths on his hands began to chew softly at some clay making soft noises in the otherwise deadly silent house. Leaving the entrance he slowly moved into the living room, looking around.

The couch was old and now tattered and despite the many years it had been, his bloodstain that had refused to be cleaned was still there. Slowly, birds started to float, settling themselves in corners of the room, on the coffee table that had a deep slash through the middle, on top of the metal bar that held the curtains up, inside a drawer, anywhere. His blue eyes were cold and seemed closer to the colour of grey as he drifted from room to room, taking in the familiar surroundings.

But then came the final room. He froze, staring with wide eyed horror at it, tears prickling and slowly running down his cheeks as he moved closer to the iron door that had at least a dozen ways to lock it from the outside. Swallowing, Deidara reached out, gently touching a lock and heard a loud click before it started to swing open. He looked around. The torture room. His room. The cold empty place that still had that maddening dripping in it. And with light pouring in and not blinding him, he realised where he'd been living.

Blood. Blood was caked everywhere, thicker in some places, but there was blood in every inch of the room, the walls, the floor, bodily fluids sometimes joined the dried blood and Deidara let out a choked sob, shaking his head. He'd been living in blood.

"_P-Please, no!"_

This was the room he'd lived the first six years of his life in.

"_Stop it! Stop it! It hurts! It hurts!"_

This was the room of his torture.

"_NO!!!!!"_

Something inside of Deidara clicked and he let out a strangled scream of fear, anger and hatred, birds flying angrily around him and into the room, pouring in through it and through the halls, filling rooms of the house.

He felt like he was going mad in there, he had to get out, had to leave.

Turning he started to run, seeing memories and their ghosts slowly rising, tearing at him, making him run faster, his heart beat harder and his breathe draw in quicker. Reaching the door to the exit he tore it open, the faint smell of smoke and fire drifting from the inside.

Sasori blinked, looking up, shocked as the door was thrown open so violently. Deidara stood at the doorway, panting, mumbling to himself, tears streaming down his cheeks. Slowly, he started to walk out, hands trembling violently as Sasori bit his lip, umbrella protecting him from the rain, watching as Deidara slowly got soaked to the bone, thunder and lightning crashing above them, rain pelting down mercilessly now.

"Deidara?" Sasori asked, looking at the blonde as he paused beside the red head. "All my life... This... This place has been... Torture, un... Torture," the blonde whispered, face hiding by his hanging fringe. Sasori turned to look at Deidara, blinking. "Y-You know... I... I'd dream of this place... And... And _that _room... The place where I was kept like an animal, un." His voice was shaky now as he clenched his fists. "I always hated it... Always wanted to forget... I... I could never stand knowing that that place still existed. I wanted to turn it into something more, un..."

Sasori swallowed, taking a step toward the blonde before freezing. Deidara was laughing. He was laughing!? "I realise it now! I realise what it is! I've known this whole time and I just couldn't put my finger on it, un!" Deidara cried out, through laughter as he turned quickly, hair whipping about, a maddened look on his face. "I'll turn this into a Masterpiece! I'll make it beautiful, un! You'll become my ART!" Deidara shouted before moving his hands up, holding a hand sign, rain pelting and wind howling, adding chills through Sasori's near-puppet body.

"THIS IS MY ART! YOU CAN BE MY FIRST MASTERPIECE, UN!" Deidara shouted at the house. "BECAUSE MY ART IS A BANG, UN!"

* * *

It hadn't even lasted a second. But after that moment, the house had gone up in flames, had exploded and all that was left was the burning wood, the glow reflecting onto Deidara's laughing face. That had not been beauty. The explosion was not art, and it saddened Sasori to think that Deidara had called such a catastrophe 'Art'. It wasn't a crazy struggle to take Deidara away from that place, he was only obedient when he'd watched the house burn to the very ground and the smouldering flames were being faintly extinguished by the pouring rain.

Sasori had stood for close to an hour, waiting for Deidara, watching as the blonde stared at the house burning, not moving yet trembling quite badly. When he'd managed to make the blonde move, he'd had to help him walk, almost half carry him to the hotel and checking back in and letting Deidara get himself cleaned and re-dressed while he waited in the darkness in an armchair by the fire, drying off his red hair.

Lost deep in thought, he only realised Deidara was done having a bath and getting dressed when he felt the arms around his neck from behind.

"Danna... You look lost in thought, un," Deidara murmured softly. Taking the towel off his head and dropping it to the ground, Sasori reached up, gently taking Deidara's hand and leading him around the couch to sit on his lap. They sat in silence for a while, Sasori gently playing with the tips of Deidara's hair while Deidara merely watched silently. "You're thinking awfully hard, un," Deidara spoke softly again, small shivers running up and down his spine from the touches to his hair.

Sasori sighed, closing his eyes and frowning, lifting Deidara's hand up and kissing the back of it before opening his eyes and looking up to the blonde. "I'm sorry, you just frightened me back at the house," Sasori spoke before looking down and away. "I guess I'm not used to seeing you like that," he murmured. Deidara blinked, looking down with a worried frown on his face, tucking some hair behind his ear as he leant down, kissing Sasori's forehead. "I'm sorry Danna, I guess it's just been so long and I kinda vented, un," Deidara spoke softly, hands reaching up to rest on Sasori's shoulders, slowly rubbing them in a massage.

Sasori nodded. "I understand," he said softly, leaning back against the couch and closing his eyes. Deidara gave a small frown before letting his face relax and a gentle smile tip his lips. "Why can't you tell me what you're thinking, un?" Deidara asked softly, gently rubbing his hands in small circles. Sasori opened his eyes, looking up at Deidara with a slight frown.

"That wasn't art."

Deidara paused, blinking and looking down at Sasori. "What do you mean Danna, un?" Deidara asked innocently as he continued kneading the tense flesh under his hands. Sasori frowned a bit more. "When you blew that place up... You said you were turning it into a Masterpiece, into Art... That wasn't Art Deidara," Sasori spoke as Deidara blinked and smiled. "No, it was art, un," Deidara spoke.

"I thought I'd taught you better Dei, Art is Eternal, something that lasts forever and can be seen all the time," Sasori said as Deidara paused. "No, it's something Fleeting, un. Art should be something brief and fast, not something that will always be there, un," Deidara said softly. Sasori sighed and shook his head. "Why would it be Fleeting? Then no one would remember it and it will be easily forgotten."

"No it won't, un."

"Yes it will."

"No it _won't_, un."

"Yes it _will_."

Deidara frowned, moving forward and bringing his and Sasori's lips together quickly, kissing him roughly, Sasori responding, wrapping on arm around Deidara's waist, the other resting on his upper back, completely unprepared. This was the first time in a day or so that Deidara had permitted him to kiss him on the lips. As Deidara pulled away, he left enough space so that when he spoke, their lips brushed together.

"Art _is _Fleeting... No matter how many years go by, I know you'll remember our first kiss... Even when I die, I know you'll remember the first time we made love in such detail it will be like you're there again, un..." Deidara breathed, making Sasori shiver.

Pulling back, Deidara gave a faint smile.

"And you know what, un...? I want to be... Just like my Art."

* * *

**_Uwa~ Deidara's started to slowly mould into the one we know in the Anime and Manga. A Fleeting Artist, and here's the cause~ Bwahahaha! Oh, how cruel of me. Well, nothing much here to add actually ^^'' Just hope you enjoyed this very much, reviews are still loved and next Chapter features some Lemony goodness~! Thanks for reading! :3_**


	12. Chapter 12

_**Ta Daa~! I return with a new chapter~ And as promised, this one contains a nice Lemon~ ;D (*Taps foot* Well?) You all thought I'd died? Where was the update? (Yeah! You promised faster updates! You're on HOLIDAYS!) I've been having a bit of trouble with Chapter 13, it keeps getting rockier. Oh! But I shouldn't tell you just yet :3 I want to give everyone a big hug and a thank you for reading, reviewing and just plain out supporting this fic! I'm very pleased! (Domo! 8D) I'd love to dedicate this to everyone who's been reading this, reviewing, adding it to favourites, and, hell, everyone really :3 To all SasoDei supporters! Enjoy I Choose My Life Chapter 12- With added Lemon~!**_

* * *

_**Chapter Twelve**_

It had been a sleepless night for Sasori, but not the type he would have liked it to have been. Instead of Deidara's naked sweaty body, moaning his name beneath him, he was dreaming of Deidara's torn and bloodied form, cold and lifeless in his hands. He'd woken up a few times in a cold sweat and looking down to see Deidara still cuddling beside him sleeping peacefully.

And it was all because Deidara had said those words.

"_I want to be... Just like my Art."_

Turning over onto his side, Sasori pulled Deidara closely, gently stroking the blonde's hair and getting a soft moan. _"Why would you say something stupid like that? You're meant to live forever with me. Why can't you turn yourself into something immortal so we can always be together? I don't want to leave you, and I don't want you to leave me," _Sasori thought as he closed his eyes with a sigh.

It was early in the morning, almost dawn, the sun was slowly peaking up from the grassy land outside their Hotel room and their room was slowly becoming brighter. Not wanting to, but not being able to help it, Sasori fell asleep, Deidara pulled closely to him.

* * *

Waking up to find his lover asleep, Deidara was surprised he was the first one awake. Turning and looking at the clock on the wall, he was even more surprised to see it closer to ten in the morning. Sitting up slowly, Deidara stretched before looking down at Sasori, leaning down and gently kissing and nipping at Sasori's neck before giving him a soft kiss on the lips.

"_Danna must be exhausted,"_ Deidara thought as he turned, gently moving out of Sasori's hold and standing. Ready to turn and go to the bathroom, he felt his shirt hooked and he blinked, turning before smiling.

"Danna, morning, un," Deidara spoke as he moved back to the bed and sat down on the edge, kissing Sasori gently. Sasori reached up, tangling his fingers in the blonde hair, pulling Deidara in to a deeper kiss, tugging him back onto the bed so the blonde was kneeling beside him, kissing back.

When they pulled away Sasori was staring hard at the blondes blue eyes with a slight frown. Deidara blinked, looking down at Sasori. "Da-" "Why wouldn't you let me kiss you before?" Deidara blinked, stunned for a second. "What do you mean Danna, un?" he asked softly as Sasori tugged the blonde onto the bed more. Deidara carefully crawled on properly before seating himself in Sasori's lap, looking down at him innocently. "You wouldn't let me kiss you... Why?" Sasori asked, a serious frown still on his face.

Deidara swallowed, looking down at Sasori. He knew he had to come up with an excuse, he couldn't tell Sasori the real reason. "I'd thrown up, un, I don't think you would have liked to kiss vomit, un," Deidara said with a smile. Of course, that was partially true, and Sasori for a second looked like he believed it before frowning and shaking his head.

"No, that's not why Dei," he said softly before shaking his head, pulling Deidara down for another soft kiss, leaving gentle butterfly kisses on the blonde's lips, "But I'll believe you for now."

Feeling himself gently pushed up and off of his master, Deidara blinked, looking over at Sasori as the red head got up and started to walk towards the bathroom. Looking down, Deidara felt guilty. If anything this made him feel worse than if Sasori got mad at him, or yelled, or pressured him a bit more.

Standing up, Deidara started to walk slowly after Sasori, reaching out and gently grasping the back of Sasori's shirt, following him still. Sasori paused and felt Deidara bump into the back of him. Turning, he looked down with a small smile to see the innocent and slightly blushed face of his lover. "My little brat, you haven't grown up a bit," Sasori teased playfully as he turned, leaning down and kissing Deidara's neck softly. Deidara gave a small whined, tilting his head to the side, moving forward and hugging Sasori.

Sasori chuckled, looking at the blonde's flushed cheeks. "My, my... You seem very sexual," Sasori teased, running a hand down the others chest and stomach before reaching and gently rubbing Deidara's slowly growing erection, causing a whine to escape from Deidara, bucking forward, arms wrapped tightly around Sasori's neck, head now buried in the red heads chest. "D-Dannaaaaa," he whimpered softly as Sasori smirked, slowly edging Deidara into the bathroom. Normally, such a thing would have bothered him had he seen it in a movie; a young child with wild emotions that had refused to kiss his lover the day before but now seemed to be eager for him. But of course, he dismissed the thoughts at the moment; he had more important things to take care of.

Sasori quickly flicked his fingers and some chakra strings came out, plugging the large bathtub before switching the water on, starting to fill it up with some warm water, Deidara had never liked hot water.

Slowly, he started to undress Deidara, leaving soft kisses and nips along the pale skin after taking the shirt off, trailing his lips down the boy's body until he reached the top of the blonde's pants, tearing them off sharply, making Deidara gasp at the collision of cool air against his hot flesh. "Deidara," Sasori purred, making the blonde blush heavily at the sensual tone he'd used. "Help your Danna get out of his clothes," he said softly. He was happy at how obedient Deidara was, how he wouldn't question, how he trusted him so blindly. He loved it, it satisfied his power-hungry side.

Soon the two were both stripped of clothes and were in the warm waters of the bath tub, kissing hungrily. Sasori was seated in the bath while Deidara was seated comfortably in Sasori's lap, hands gently gripping Sasori's face as he kissed him, Sasori's hands gently rubbing the blonde's feminine hips.

Sasori pulled his lips away briefly, but enough so that their lips brushed while he spoke. "Dei... Want to try something... New?" he asked the blonde. Deidara blinked, looking down at Sasori, moving his fringe out of the way, slightly confused. "Danna, un?" he asked softly, panting lightly. Sasori smirked, gently gripping the blonde's hips and lifting him until Deidara was almost sitting on his erect member, making the blonde smile and blush slightly. "Oh," he said softly before shifting a bit more, making himself a bit more comfortable. "Did you want to be stretched?" "I think I'm okay, un." "You sure?" "Un."

Sasori smiled, gently rubbing Deidara's hips, of course this needed some comfort, Deidara was about to technically impale himself! Deidara took in deep, calming breathes before shutting his eyes, frowning lightly.

"Actually... Just to be safe, un?" he asked softly, opening his eyes again. Sasori chuckled, nipping Deidara's neck lightly as he gently moved his hand down, pushing a finger in, the water around them helping as a form of lubricant.

Deidara cried out softly. "Dei, help me," Sasori said softly with a gentle smirk. Deidara nodding, starting to move, pulling himself off Sasori's finger and on slowly, biting his lip softly, hands slowly dropping to sit comfortably on Sasori's shoulders. Sasori soon added a second and Deidara gave a soft whimper of pain. This was a good idea, otherwise, it would have hurt so badly.

When Deidara was used to the two fingers he added a third, making the blonde whimper and fidget slightly uncomfortably. "Shh, it's okay Dei, it's okay, sit still for a while," Sasori spoke softly before feeling Deidara start to move. He gently nipped and sucked on Deidara's neck while he prepared him, listening to the blonde's pants.

When he felt Deidara was ready he gently pulled his hand away, looking at the blonde who was pouting lightly. Sasori gave a small nod and Deidara bit his lip, lifting himself up. He positioned Sasori's member at his entrance, biting his lip slightly harder. "It's okay Dei, you can do it," Sasori said softly. He could tell the blonde was nervous, it was his second time and he was pushing the red head into himself, definitely not something anyone could do without fear of hurting themselves.

Sasori simply rubbed Deidara's arms softly, letting the blonde take deep breathes as he slowly eased Sasori's tip inside of him, making the red head moan softly and the blonde hitch his breath in slight pain. "D-Danna... I..." Deidara shook his head, gripping Sasori's shoulders tightly. Sasori gently kissed and nipped Deidara's neck. "It's okay, it's okay," Sasori said softly as Deidara slowly moved down a bit more, a choked whimper escaping him. "Dei-" "God fucking damn it, too slow, un!" Deidara yelled at himself, and Sasori's eyes widened and he let out a loud moan, not expecting Deidara to thrust himself down hard and fast, impaling himself in the process, but he still heard Deidara cry out in pain, and could feel the small smooth teeth digging into the junction between his neck and shoulders, a tear dropping onto his shoulder.

Sasori took in a few deep breathes as he started to rub Deidara's back softly, gently rubbing Deidara's lower back and ass, knowing that this probably hurt like mad. The blonde was lightly trembling in his arms, teeth occasionally sinking slightly deeper from pain before Deidara shuddered and coughed lightly. "You okay Dei?" Sasori asked after a while as Deidara gave a muffled "Un," before he lifted his head slightly, a thin trail of blood leaving his lips. Sasori blinked, perhaps he'd just pierced the skin on the shoulder.

Lifting himself up and down, he started slowly riding Sasori, causing the red head to groan at the sensation. Deidara's panting had started again and he moaned softly as well, eyes shut and head lolled back, mouth parted in a silent gasp as he started to bounce in Sasori's lap. That felt so much better when he was actually _moving_.

Soon, moans, whimpers and groans filled the room along with the light splashing of water and panting from both artists.

Deidara spread his legs slightly wider either side of Sasori, pushing the red head deeper and making him moan loudly as he felt himself hit a spot inside of him. Slowly he started to move harder and faster, Sasori thrusting up when he shoved down, making everything so much more _pleasurable._

"Ahh, Sasori," Deidara moaned out softly, making the red head in turn moan. He love the way his name rolled off the others tongue. Gripping Deidara's hips he started to help moving him up and down, the thrusts and movements getting slowly faster and harder, heavy panting filling the room.

Soon Deidara gave a small groan whimpering loudly, the spot inside him getting hit continuously, making his speech all but useless. "Da-... Nnn... I... Ahh~!" he moaned out loudly, eyes shut in ecstasy. Sasori let go of Deidara's hips with one hand, letting the blonde bounce hard in his lap, gripping his throbbing member and started to pump it in time with the movements, making Deidara cry out loudly in pleasure.

Slamming himself down a final time, Deidara screamed as he came onto both his and Sasori's stomach, his movements slowing down slightly as he rested his head on Sasori's shoulder. Sasori thrust upwards a few more times, Deidara's tightness closing in around him in a vice like grip making him cum deep inside Deidara with a low groan of "_Dei_", making the blonde jerk upwards a little as it hit his prostate, pleasure shooting throughout him again, a soft moan passing his lips. Sasori slowly rocked in and out of Deidara a little more, releasing the last of the cum inside Deidara before stopping, merely leaning against the back of the bath.

The two remained still, Deidara panting hard, forehead lazily resting on Sasori's shoulder. Sasori started to lift the blonde's hips up but was stopped with a shake of the head and a hand on his as Deidara moved himself back down so Sasori's softening erection was still inside of him. "I... I like you... Inside me... Please... Let's just... Stay like this... For a while, un... While I-" "Catch your breath?" "Unn..."

Sasori gave a soft smile, gently rubbing Deidara's lower back, resting his head lightly against Deidara's shoulder, his eyes closed. He didn't care how long they sat there like that, he could have sat an eternity like this, he felt complete and perfect, like everything was okay and would be, just with the small blonde in his arms. But when Deidara slowly lifted his head up and pulled himself off, the wariness showed on his face, eyes slightly glazed, showing his tiredness, but a gentle and content smile on his face, some blood still near his lips. He'd probably laid his head down in the bite mark he'd given the red head.

Sitting in Sasori's lap, Deidara lazily drew patterns on the other's shoulders, head resting on it as well. Small liquid drops were falling onto Sasori's shoulders and running down his arm, but he dismissed it easily as sweat, or water. "You feel tired; maybe you should go rest Dei." "I love the way you say I _feel _tired instead of look, or seem, un." "I know how you feel in every mood, you might not think so, but your body is a dead give away to emotions." "Ha. That's a lie, un." "My point is, you're going to fall asleep in my lap in the bath, and I'm not going to pull you out, dry you, dress you, then take you back to bed before masturbating cause you would have moaned when I dried your hair, and I'm going to get aroused." "Don't worry Danna, no need to be a verbal Frigid, un, feel free to say the real word occasionally." Sasori laughed, rubbing Deidara's back gently.

"Unlike you, I'm actually mature enough to say these things," Sasori said as Deidara laughed gently. "Mature? Nah, just embarrassing, un," he said with a small smile. "Alright then, if you had to say it, what 'Code' would you give masturbating then?" He asked, grinning at the small blush that formed on Deidara's cheeks. "I'm not gonna say. You're such a pervert trying to turn on a young teen," Deidara mumbled, sitting up as Sasori laughed, leaning forward and kissing Deidara on the lips.

"Off you go," he said gently as Deidara nodded, standing from the tub and moved out, grabbing a towel and drying himself before moving back and kissing Sasori lightly, towel wrapped around his waist. "Good night then, un," he said softly as Sasori chuckled. "At one in the afternoon." "One? How late did we get up?" "We didn't get up late; we were just fucking for ages." "Sex Danna, I'm mature enough to say sex, un." "Get to bed," Sasori said with a laugh, kissing Deidara one last time and watched the blonde walking back to their room.

He sighed, sinking slightly deeper into the warm tub of water, closing his eyes, resting his head and arms against the edge of the tub lazily. The blonde's mouth had tasted like blood. Perhaps he'd taken quite a big bite from his shoulder. He slowly splashed a bit of water onto the shoulder Deidara bit down onto, looking down as he watched blood get washed off before frowning and pausing.

The blood was gone, and his shoulder was now clean, faint bite marks, but not enough to draw any form of blood, not even deep enough to pierce the flesh... There was no wound. So that only left one thought in Sasori's mind...

Where had the blood come from?

* * *

**_*Grabs tissue* Wow, that's done :33 I can't believe it took me so long, I'm really sorry every one! But hopefully this is good enough for the wait? Right? (If the readers hate it, you own them BIG TIME Twisted...) Well, what did you guys think? Drop by a review and let me know what you thought about it :3 Next up, Chapter 13 (Dun, dun, DUN!!!) And as the "unlucky" number goes, it does get pretty unlucky. (Shh! Don't spoil it!!) That's all I'm saying! Hopefully as a Christmas or New Years Gift (Not everyone celebrates Christmas!) I can upload Chapter 13 before the New Year Australian Time. Apologies to those who don't get it until the New Year. But otherwise, sorry to leave you all on this little Cliff hanger. Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy (SasoDei filled) New Year!! :33_**


	13. Chapter 13

**_Hello, hello, and welcome to the next exciting installment of I Choose My Life! (Enough with cheesy openings, get to the point!) Well, to those who celebrate it, Merry Christmas, to those who don't, happy free present opening or 'Non-Existant-Holiday' Day. While some of you are spending this time of year in lovely snow, I'm stuck here with crappy fans adn trying to cool myself down from sweltering heat (*Dies*). But, of course there is always a nice big bonus to this time of year, specifically, the ending time of year! Happy New Years to everyone, I'm uploading this chapter on teh 31st, just six hours from the New Year and am wishing everyone a VERY happy 2009! :3 (And to all those who read this chapter much fucking later and thinking "WTF, it's July!" then Happy New Year for the year you're in and the next :3) Anyway, about ICML. I've had so many reviews of people asking "What's with the blood?? D: " Well, you'll all be happy to know, you get an answer in this chapter :3 So enough stalling, go! Read! Find out the answer to your question! :3 And enjoy I Choose My Life Chapter Thirteen~_**

* * *

_**Chapter Thirteen**_

"Good morning, un~!" "YOU FUCKERS WERE AT IT AGAIN! YOU SON OF A BITCHES!" Deidara winced and dove behind Sasori, hiding behind the red head. Sasori looked at Hidan coolly, blinking. "Hidan, what are you screaming about this time?" Sasori asked calmly, moving to make a coffee, Deidara still hidden behind him. Hidan's eyes widened before pointing to just beneath his eyes. "SEE THIS FUCKER!?!? SEE THESE!? SHADOWS! I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO FUCKING SLEEP SINCE YOU TWO CAME BACK! IT'S ALL YOUR FUCKING FAULT!" Hidan shouted before turning, pointing an accusatory finger at Deidara.

"ESPECIALLY YOU BITCH!"

Deidara blinked, poking his head out and blinking at Hidan innocently. "M-Me, un? Why?" He asked softly, Sasori now moving to the table and sitting down, Deidara standing beside him. Hidan sighed, glaring at the artists. "What the fuck do you mean 'Why?'?" He asked with a grumble.

Deidara merely stared quietly. Hidan sighed. "You wanna know why? YOU WANNA FUCKING KNOW _WHY_!?" Hidan shouted before wrapping his arms around himself. "Ohh~! Oh yeah Danna! Fuck me harder! Aaah! Yeah, harder! Harder! Sasoriii~!" Hidan mocked in a slightly more feminine voice.

Deidara turned a bright red, looking away as Sasori looked up, frowning. "Hidan, please, never imply having sex with me _ever _again, even if you are imitating the brat," he spoke with a glare, taking another sip of coffee. "Besides, he begs for fucks much better than that."

Hidan threw his arms up into the air, surrendering. "I don't want to fucking know!" he shouted as Sasori glanced at him, smirking darkly. "Besides, he screams my name more. It's more like 'Aaahh~! Saso- Unnn~ Yeah! Sasori! Ha-Harder! Unnn~! So good!'" "I SAID I DIDN'T WANT TO FUCKING KNOW!" Hidan screamed, clapping his hands over his ears. Sasori smirked, taking another sip of coffee before hearing a light cough behind him. He glanced up to see Deidara's bright red face and smiled. "It's beautiful, it makes me really hot the way you beg like that," he said reassuringly, gently kissing the back of Deidara's hand before taking another sip of his coffee.

"Morning all~!" Deidara blinked, looking up and smiling. "Ah! Morning Konan-Nee-Chan, un!" He said with a smile. "Someone's unusually happy," Sasori noted as he looked at Konan who was grinning from ear to ear. Konan giggled, grinning. "I had a good ni-.... Is Hidan trying to break his head open on the counter?" She asked, noting Hidan smashing his head hard on the edge of the counter. Sasori glanced over before shrugging. "He had a rough sleep." "Why?" "If you didn't hear then I don't know what to say." "Oh, you mean you and Deidara having sex?" "Yeah." "That was hot." "What, un!??!"

Konan blushed, looking away as she started to busy herself with some coffee as well. Sasori grinned, placing his own down as he pulled Deidara into his lap easily, the boy straddling him. "It _was_ hot, wasn't it Dei-Chan?" Sasori breathed as he leaned up, nibbling on the others neck, Deidara trembling lightly in his arms. Konan looked around, her eyes widening and a dark red blush spreading across her cheeks. "U-Um, S-Sasori," she said softly as she red head slowly sunk his teeth into the blonde's neck, making him moan softly. At the sound of his name, his brown-red eyes flickered up, looking at Konan as he slowly sucked on the blonde's neck, making the young boy moan softly, gripping his shoulders.

Konan swallowed, trying again to speak, but failed when Sasori gave Deidara's ass a hard squeeze, causing a slightly louder moan to fill the room. Hidan groaned out in frustration, cracking his head sharply on the table before standing up shakily. "F'CK'N LEAV'N!" He announced in a slur, blood pouring down his front from the split skull as he left the room in a dazed hurry.

As Sasori lifted his lips from the blooming love mark on Deidara's neck, he smirked. "Konan-Sama, you're the only one left, why are you looking at us with such a shocked expression?" Sasori teased as the blue haired woman gripped her nose. "N-Nothing! Y-You keep going! I-I don't mind!" She stuttered as she got her coffee, moving to sit down, trying- forcing herself to avert her eyes, cheeks a deep red.

Sasori stopped what he was doing; smirking as he gently rubbed small circles on Deidara's thighs. Konan turned her head away, throwing a tissue in threat towards Sasori, not caring that it missed by at least a metre and fluttered down harmlessly onto the table. "Leave the poor boy alone and let him eat or he'll starve," She scolded softly. Sasori gave a sigh and let go of Deidara, taking his coffee as the blonde shakily stood up, face a deep red but slightly paler than usual. "Fine, he's free. Just because you enjoy seeing two guys making out," Sasori mumbled, "One might think you're a closet pervert."

Konan blinked, staring horrified at Sasori as Deidara took a cup and started to pour some water into it. "I'm _not _a closet pervert! And I do not take pleasure in seeing two guys make out!" "Pleasure? I never said that my dear, I said _enjoy_." "Shut up you--" Konan's voice was cut short as glass shattered to the ground. Sasori frowned, looking over to Deidara, glass cup shattered in front of his feet, water spilling and a few drops of blood hitting the floor. "Oh Dei-kun! You dropped the glass! Are you hurt anywhere?" Konan asked, getting up and moving down, starting to pick up the fragments of glass before Deidara stepped in any of them.

Frowning a bit more, Sasori stood up, seeing blood hitting the floor more rapidly. "Dei?" He asked softly, moving forward, noticing the trembling of the boy now. Konan looked up and covered her mouth in shock, eyes widening in fear. "Deidara?" Sasori spoke more firmly as he took a few more steps closer. Deidara let out a choked sob, hand reaching up and wiping at his mouth, glancing at his hand, whole palm smeared with blood as dizziness started to hit him.

Sasori darted forward, turning the blonde around, seeing blood trickling from his mouth, already soaking his shirt and still dripping on the floor, a look of fear on the blonde's face. "Deidara, what's wrong?" "D-Danna... I... I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier, un... I di-didn't think it was important, un," Deidara whispered softly, coughing up some more blood, face paling a bit more as he wobbled. Sasori gripped Deidara's shoulders as he nearly fell forward, tears running down the blonde's face. "Earlier? How long has this been happening?" Sasori asked firmly. The room seemed to tug itself out from underneath Deidara's feet, causing him to fall forward into Sasori's arms, sweat trickling down his face.

"Deidara? DEIDARA?!" Sasori shouted. "What do we do? He's spewing blood!" Konan spoke hurriedly as she helped lay Deidara down on clean part of the floor. "Get Zetsu. Now," Sasori said quickly, tilting Deidara onto his side so he didn't choke on his own blood, or drown in it.

Standing, Konan rushed out of the room, leaving Sasori trying to figure out what to do, Deidara trembling, twitching occasionally.

Within a minute or two, Konan had rushed back into the room with Zetsu right behind her who merely frowned down at the sight. "It's finally happening then... **Brat's heart is failing, took it long enough...** I hope we can help him this time. **Unlikely, it got worse, we should have pulled the life support when we had the chance, stupid puppet's going to get hurt now...**" Zetsu spoke as he knelt down beside Sasori, touching a vein on Deidara's neck, waiting for a pulse as Sasori stared in shock, the information sinking in.

"Sorry this is taking longer than usual... **Your fucking hickeys are slowing the process down**," Zetsu growled as Sasori shot him a glare. "Shut up, you've got a whole fucking shit load of explaining to do," Sasori growled, picking Deidara up and stood.

A dark smirk crossed Zetsu's lips as both sides chuckled. "_**You should have listened a year ago...**_"

* * *

Hidan frowned, sighing as he shook his head. "Fuck it; I'm not fucking doing it." "Hidan," Kakuzu growled, glaring over at his partner. Hidan gave him a pleading look, and then sighed. "Come the fuck on, who says it's fucking dangerous? The other three fucking aren't," Hidan mumbled as he turned, moving to his bookshelf and pick up a ritual knife, long, silver, curved at the tip, and deadly sharp.

Sasori looked down warily, frowning. "Results are final; it's been put off too long. Bad enough the brat kept this a secret from me... Not a bloody wonder why he wouldn't kiss me, I would have tasted his blood," Sasori murmured, rubbing the bridge of his nose tiredly. "Don't beat yourself up about it Sasori, kids are unpredictable the way they try and protect us, but they're still kids, they don't know what's really protecting us," Kakuzu spoke calmly, glancing over as the immortal behind him snorted. "Fuck you both! What I fucking reckon is Dei-Chan fucking freaked out the second he started coughing up blood, didn't want people freaking out and thought it was something that would fucking go away, it's simple you bitches!" Hidan spoke as he grabbed another knife, sharpening the two against each other.

Kakuzu glared at Hidan. "You assume that's right?" Kakuzu scolded. "I fucking know it's right, but that's not the fuckin' point!" "What is the point then?" "The fucking point is I'm _not _performing a Jashinist ritual on him, regardless if he's got mouths popping out of his fucking ass!" "But they're _not_ Hidan; they're coming out of his chest." "My fucking point exactly! I could kill him if I fucking miss because it's directly above his fucking heart!"

The shouting match between Kakuzu and Hidan came to an abrupt halt and they both looked down and away from each other.

Sasori looked down, gripping the cold cement beneath his hands. "Please..." He was already on his knees. He was already begging. "Please Hidan... Kakuzu... Help Deidara..." His voice was a whisper and Hidan and Kakuzu glanced over to Sasori, pity in their eyes. "Please seal the mouth..." Hidan's arms relaxed, still gripping the knives by his side. Some of Kakuzu's threads twisted with nerves, looking down at one of his long time friends on his knees begging him for help.

"I won't let him die... He will not die... Never... His art won't win, he- No, that mouth, it needs to go, needs to be sealed..." Sasori's fiery brown eyes burned with sudden anger and passion. "I won't let Deidara die!"

Hidan and Kakuzu stared for a while before Hidan turned, putting one knife down, picking up a book and a bottle and pen-brush. "Come on 'Kuzu, before I fucking throw my guts up from the fucking sappiness this 'emotionless' puppet is dripping all over our fucking floor," Hidan grumbled, a slight tint of pink on his cheeks and sadness in his eyes.

* * *

"AAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!" "FUCK! HOLD HIM STILL!" "I'M TRYING!" "NO! GET OFF ME! GET AWAY, UN! GO AWAY!"

Sasori winced, tightening the straps and threads around Deidara's wrist, keeping the blonde's waist down with his body weight. Hidan cursed loudly again, pulling the knife back before turning and scowling at Kakuzu. "Pull the fucking things tighter!" "He's stronger than he looks, you don't think I'm fucking trying you fucking zealot!!" Kakuzu shouted as he sent more threads out from his forearms, wrapping them tightly around Deidara's waist and hips, tying him to the bed as Sasori tightened thick leather straps around his other wrist.

"How the fuck can I do my ritual if he keeps fucking moving? I'll fucking stab him!" Hidan shouted angrily, red-violet eyes wide with disbelief at the blonde's strength. "Stab him and you'll find yourself dead and _staying _dead!" Sasori growled angrily. He turned his muddy eyes to Deidara, a soft look overcoming his face as he gently stroked the boy's cheek, making sure that Deidara kept his head to the side to avoid choking on blood. "Deidara, stay still, stay still, we're doing this to help you," Sasori soothed, wiping the tears away from the pale boy's cheeks. "N-No, un! The-They're ugly! I'll b-be ugly! Y-You'll leave me, un!" Deidara sobbed.

Hidan shook his head. "Dei-Chan! Puppet isn't fucking leaving you because of this! He wants to fucking help you, stop being a narcissist and fucking-" "NO! I DON'T WANT IT! I DON'T WANT IT, UN!" Deidara screamed, twisting his body violently, leg kicking out and colliding into Hidan's ribs, making the man curse. "Boy you're being a whole fucking lot more stubborn to people who want to fucking help you stop dying you bitch!" Hidan shouted as he gripped the knife, pressing his free hand to Deidara's chest, pressing him down.

"OI! PUPPET! HOLD HIM STILL AND FUCKING QUIET! THIS WILL HURT!" Hidan shouted as he put the blade down to Deidara's chest. "Why do you have to cut him open?!" Sasori asked, panicked. "Tearing the fucking skin, seeing how big the mouth is so we can stitch the whole fucking thing or it will fucking open anyway and all this would be fucking worthless!" Hidan shouted back as Sasori's eyes widened and he frowned in worry. "Deidara, Deidara, calm down, calm, we don't want to hurt you, we're helping!" Sasori spoke loudly, gently stroking Deidara's face, wiping the tears away. "NO! DON'T DO IT! DON'T LET HIM DO IT! DANNA! PLEASE! PLEASE, UN! DON'T LET HIM DO THIS TO ME!" Deidara screamed, still trying to free himself, thrashing violently, the threads barely managing to keep him still.

Hidan bit his lip, dropping the knife down and level with Deidara's chest, the tip of the knife scraping the skin lightly. Hidan took in a deep breath, whispering a quick prayer to Jashin before slowly driving the blade in and dragging it. Deidara let out an ear piercing scream before it died in his throat, gurgling and choking on the blood that was now dribbling from his mouth like an open tap. Sasori quickly turned the blonde's head to the side again, moving his fringe out of the way as Hidan dragged the blade to one side, eyes widening in horror as skin tore itself open and a large pink muscle forced its way out, tearing the skin open and causing another scream to choke Deidara, blood now starting to pool around him, flooding from the every mouth, palm mouths choking up blood and whimpering in pain, the mouth on his chest twisting into a smirk and sticking its tongue up into the air, tasting the blood.

Hidan drew the knife back, frowning. "That's as big as it will fucking get I reckon, we've got ourselves a fucking big one," Hidan growled as he grabbed his ink. "Kakuzu! Shove that thing's fucking tongue back in and stitch it shut!" Hidan barked out, quickly writing symbols around the edges. "Understood," Kakuzu spoke as he started to lace the edges of the mouth shut, forcing the tongue to retreat as the stitching came closer. It wasn't going to get sealed without a fight though and kept licking the ink symbols clean and tearing itself open again and again, trying to break the stitches, causing its carrier more pain.

The struggle was long and hard, and when the stiches were finally in and the symbols were finished, the three members of Akatsuki were exhausted, strained and feeling weak. Hidan glanced up, panting. "That took so much fucking chakra I think I might just die," He mumbled, slumping to the floor. Kakuzu followed suit, slumping down and leaning against the bed as the threads loosened from Deidara's trembling limbs. Sasori kissed Deidara's neck softly, slowly untying the leather straps from Deidara's wrists.

He was sobbing softly, chalk white cheeks stained with tears and blood he'd coughed up.

Looking down, Sasori gently stroked the blonde's cheek worriedly. "Dei... Are you still awake?" he said softly. Deidara slowly opened his eyes, tears streaming down his face before they snapped open in fury and he twisted, jumping sharply off the bed and twisting his leg, cracking Hidan in the head with a near skull-splitting kick. "I HATE YOU!" Deidara screamed, twisting and aiming a kick in Kakuzu's direction, clipping his shoulder and hearing a little splintering noise. Sasori frowned, diving forward and pinning Deidara to the ground. "Idiot! You shouldn't move!" "NO! LET GO OF ME, UN! LET GO! DON'T TOUCH ME! DON'T TOUCH ME!" Sasori frowned and pinned Deidara's arm to the floor as the blonde went for another violent punch aimed at Hidan who was now bleeding from a crack in his head, staring blankly at Deidara.

"Dei-" "NO! YOU HATE ME! YOU HATE ME! LET GO, UN!" "Deidara!?" "I DON'T WANT SYMPATHY! JUST... Just... Just let go... Let... Let go..." It took a few seconds for Sasori to realise that Deidara was sobbing again, trembling underneath his hold. "Deidara, it had to be done," he said gently. "You could have died." It was only after the sentence left his mouth that he realised he'd nearly choked on the words and pain had filled his heart. Die... No... He had a fear of Deidara dying now...

After a while he loosened his grip on Deidara, pulling him up into his arms. "Shh, it's okay love, I know you're distressed, I know it hurts, but I still love you, okay? We can have Zetsu fix it soon too if you don't want anyone to see it, we can hide it, okay? I love you even if you did have mouths on every inch of your skin, okay?" Sasori soothed softly, wiping Deidara's eyes gently. Hidan glanced at the two before slowly crawling over to Kakuzu who was gripping his shoulder in pain.

"Oi, Heathen... You alright?" Hidan spoke softly, reaching out and gently touching the shoulder where Deidara had almost certainly shattered the bone there. Kakuzu grunted slightly but nodded. "I'm fine Zealot," he mumbled. The way the Zombie Twins showed that they cared for each other. Hidan glanced over at the two artists, frowning. "I think Deidara's reached expiry date, don't you think? He couldn't complete missions before and only started to come back with successful missions a year ago, something's going on in his head that's making him incapable again," Kakuzu spoke softly to his partner as he stood. "Incapable?" Hidan questioned, standing as well. "Sasori, we're off, take care of Deidara, make sure he doesn't move too much," Kakuzu instructed loudly as Sasori nodded, slowly lifting Deidara up and moving him towards the bathroom slowly.

"I'll get him cleaned up."

"Alright, just careful not to unstitch anything."

"I won't."

With that soft promise Sasori disappeared with Deidara into the bathroom door, Kakuzu and Hidan walking out and into the hall, starting to walk back quietly. Turning his head, Hidan frowned. "So, are you going to fucking explain?" "There's nothing to explain." "To hell there fucking isn't!" Hidan stopped in front of Kakuzu frowning up at him. Kakuzu paused and blinked. "What did you mean by incapable?" Hidan asked again. Kakuzu sighed, shaking his head as he started to walk again, moving around Hidan who started to follow him.

"I thought it was pretty obvious when I saw him, and with your little suicide runs to Pein-Sama's office I would have thought that you would have figured it out by now, you read the official files after all," Kakuzu spoke in a gruff voice, opening their door. Hidan sighed, scowling. "So fucking what? I don't fucking get it! Explain!" "Ah, you weren't told?" "So fucking what? Tell me now!"

Kakuzu stopped in the middle of the room, turning and glanced at Hidan who had the door shut behind him. There was a moments silence as Hidan stared, cheeks a faint pink under Kakuzu's gaze. After the silence Kakuzu sighed, turning and pulling his mask down and off, removing the headgear.

"Deidara's ill."

"No fucking shit Sherlock."

"He's dying."

Hidan froze, eyes wide, eyebrows creased in a frown. "Bullshit... Bull_shit_!" He muttered as Kakuzu shed the coat. "The mouths he has are a Kekkei Genkai, but also a disease. Each mouth has a mind of its own but carries a general thought trail of its Master, in this case Deidara," Kakuzu paused to drop his shirt into the slowly forming clothes pile. "Deidara's chakra is explosive, that's how he can create those birds, a very unique technique, if not terminated." "Terminated?" "He's the last person who carries this blood line limit," Kakuzu explained.

Hidan blinked, nodding. "Oh... So... What's so fucking bad? Why's he sick? He's fucking sixteen, he can't have picked up something bad already, he's been fucking babied by us most of his life," Hidan mumbled. "Pein-Sama never really intended for us to get attached to him. He's what you call something of a manipulator. He initially intended to bring Deidara here in the hopes of creating a soulless Kamikaze," Kakuzu explained as Hidan frowned. "He wanted a fucking suicide bomber?" Kakuzu nodded and Hidan cursed as he walked over and slumped down on the bed. "I still don't fucking get why that has anything to do with why Deidara's sick," Hidan grumbled. Kakuzu sighed, shaking his head. "You really are an idiot."

Hidan frowned, mouth open and about to retort when Kakuzu spoke. "Listen... Deidara won't live to see thirty, I'm sure he's already figured that out for himself, and I'm sure by now Sasori knows. The mouth was on his chest, and directly above his heart, which caused him to cough up blood, the mouth gave him an irregular heartbeat and damaged his heart steadily so that it bled occasionally. If we hadn't sealed that mouth now I'm sure that it would have taken control and then detonated on its own before Deidara became a full adult," Kakuzu explained. "The kid's never been mentally stable, after the things I've heard happened to him, I'm not surprised, and I don't blame him. I'd say his nightmares rival that of Itachi's."

Hidan glanced at the ground. "So... He's insane?" Hidan mused. "He's at last become what Pein has willed him to be, I think the appearance of that mouth has done it... It's snapped him... He has no sanity left, a psychotic murderer with a gift and an eye for beauty."

Kakuzu glanced up through the dirtied window, the moon dulling behind the clouds that were forming. Hidan looked up nervously, the pale lighting shadowing his face.

"It's coming, our end is near," Kakuzu said dully, brushing a thin trail of dust from the window as Hidan's face twisted in panic. "H-Hey! Don't go fucking saying that," He spoke as he stood, walking over to Kakuzu, wrapping his arms around the tanned torso. "It's a curse... It's followed us all... And that boy is going to start the madness." "Shut up Kakuzu, shut up, shut the _fuck _up! Y-You're freaking me out, shut up! You won't die! You're fucking immortal like me you dick head! You have five fucking hearts, no one can fucking kill you, or me! I'm fucking immortal; Jashin-Sama will protect us!"

Kakuzu turned around and smiled, chuckling, leaning down and claiming the pale silver haired man's lips with his own before brushing the tears from Hidan's eyes. "There's no such thing as Jashin, Hidan," Kakuzu spoke softly with a smile before it became sombre and serious.

"But for once... I pray to god that it isn't the end..."

* * *

**_Oh Jashin, a dark ending... Such a shame too, but it is a bit creepy to think of Kakuzu being scared. But still, what's this 'Curse' he's talking about that's got even HIM scared? D: (WRITE FASTER!!!!) Well, I hope that gave you the answer you were looking for about the bleeding, any questions still? Feel free to drop me a PM/Review and ask :3 Deidara's morphing quicker, starting to see resembelances between this Deidara here and our one from the Anime? Well, for the next chapter, I'm debating what to do. But most likely I'll give you a Lemon :3 (WTF? You haven't PLANNED this?!?) I have! I have! Honestly! I'm just not sure about the order between the next two Chapters, but I've figured it out mainly. But expect some tasty Lemon~ (Tasty Kinky Lemon ;p ) Until then, thanks so much for reading! Enjoy! Review's are loved~ Have a very Happy New Year and best wishes to all SasoDei lovers out there~!!!!!_**


	14. Chapter 14

**_*Triumphant Music* I return~! (*Sobs* Oh my fucking Jashin! About time! Where have you BEEN Twisted!?!?) Well, around, I've been visiting friends constantly enjoying parties from the New Year, running completely crazy when the fireworks erupted, hell, my crazy high on the New Year went for close to two weeks and I barely had time to touch my computer and write, so I'm sorry for this. Well, hope everyone's having a great year so far :3 I got amazing responses from last Chapter in all the reviews, thank you all so much :3 I'm really ecstatic :D (But you said it would be out sometime last week? It's up almost a week late!) Again, sorry, but it took a while to write this, came out to be around 13 Pages in Microsoft Word D: My god. But I hope that it's worth the wait, at least a bit? This Chapter was slightly harder to write, fun, but a bit hard for me, strange. Anyway, after a bit of fucking around with the plot, I decided to do a few Changes, and for that the Lemon got bumped up to this Chapter. (*Gasp* So that means...!!) Yep, here's a Lemon upcoming :3 Hope you enjoy, sorry for the wait! Hope Chapter Fourteen is up to everyone's standards :3_**

* * *

_**Chapter Fourteen**_

Wake up. Kiss his lover on the cheek. Leave the room carefully to let him sleep. Go to the kitchen. Have some strong coffee. That was the routine Sasori had set up. But slowly, he started to do it robotically. The tender kiss he'd leave on Deidara's cheek became habit and started to lose its meaning, leaving the covers became easier and easier as warmth became less and less. The coffee tasted weaker and weaker on his tongue, even when he drank coffee straight and as strong as it could be.

Sasori stared down emotionlessly at the cup. He stared at his reflection in the cup, watching the straight black liquid swirl a bit before putting it down. He didn't need it anymore. He'd begun to wonder why he could stay awake all night watching his lover sleep and not feel tired at all. He wondered why the bed was no longer warm with his lover's body heat. He'd been wondering why the soft skin against his lips was... Was nothing... Just pressure.

It was all numbing. He concentrated as much chakra as he could to his lips and tongue, raised the cup to his lips and tried to take another drink. He almost smiled when he felt his tongue singe at the heat he'd made it and at the overly bitter flavour he'd had. So, it took concentration to feel close to normally, but, he could feel without concentrated chakra, but very faintly. _"How long until I feel nothing at all?" _The thought saddened him, and he started to regret turning into a puppet.

Leaving the coffee where it was on the table, he stood up, deciding to return to Deidara who was most likely still sleeping peacefully.

When he reached his room, he was surprised when he found Deidara on his stomach, hugging the pillow close, face buried in it, blankets pooled around his waist. He'd sat up and hadn't bothered to cover himself again it seemed. "Good morning Dei," Sasori said softly as he put on a gentle smile, chuckling softly as Deidara jumped a little, startled. The blonde smiled back, turning onto his side and gestured for Sasori to return to the bed. Seating himself comfortably beside his lover, Sasori leant down, kissing Deidara on the lips. He was pleasantly surprised as Deidara kissed him back passionately.

"I take it you feel better?" Sasori asked softly. Deidara blinked, sitting up and tested stretching his back and smirked, nodding. "Un, all better," he said softly as Sasori gently ran his hands down the blonde's pale chest. Sasori smiled. "Good, I was worried for a while, it's been a few months," he said as he kissed the stitching gently. Deidara smiled, gently taking Sasori's chin and guiding his lips to his own, kissing him softly.

After a while he pulled back with a smile. "Ne, Danna, could we go out somewhere, un? It's been ages and I think I'm going mad seen the same halls every day, un," Deidara joked with a laugh. Sasori blinked, giving the other a worried look. "You're going mad?" He asked softly as Deidara laughed, shaking his head. "It's an expression Sasori no Danna, un, I'm just bored as hell here and as much as it was fun when I was about six, being treated like china is boring after the first few days, not to mention tedious after a few months, un," Deidara spoke, shifting and dropping his feet over the edge of the bed. Sasori smiled. "Good, we were running out of my coffee, we can go down to the village and grab some food and wander around a bit," Sasori spoke before looking Deidara's body up and down as the blonde stood, stretching his arms over his head.

"Hnn..."

Deidara blinked, turning to look back at Sasori, dropping his arms. "What is it, un?" He asked softly. Sasori gave a smirk, eyes resting on Deidara's backside. "We might even be able to get some exercise too," Sasori spoke.

Deidara's face went red and he turned fully, covering his ass with his hands. "Eh Danna! You're such a creep, un! Are you implying I'm fat, or maybe it's the way you said '_we_' could get exercise while staring at my ass that makes this somewhat of a dirty implication, un," Deidara mumbled. Sasori chuckled, shrugging. "No, I simply meant a walk, an honest and innocent comment," Sasori said as he stood as well. Deidara scoffed, blushing as he walked to Sasori, giving him a gentle hug. "Unn, funny how when I tell you I'm perfectly fine those 'non-existent' hormones of yours start raging and making you lust after me, un," Deidara spoke.

Sasori faked a shocked expression as he looked down slightly at his partner. "You mistake me for a horny old paedophile," Sasori spoke softly as Deidara laughed, nuzzling Sasori's nose with his own.

"It's cause you are one, un."

"Your fault though Dei."

"Oops, Sasori no Danna's Dei-kun turned him into something immoral, what to do, un?"

"Work it out of him?"

"Ha-ha, un, funny, you're trying to trick me into sex. Tough, I'm hungry and want to stretch my legs without a limp, un."

"You're no fun at all!" Sasori protested as Deidara let go, moving to the doorway before paused, hand gently resting on the doorway, turning his head slightly and looking over his shoulder. "I never said no to tonight though, un, I have needs too," Deidara purred before moving into the hallway, a slight sway in his hips.

Sasori blinked, licking his lips and smirking. "Damn, the boy knows how to tease," Sasori said with a slightly sadistic smirk.

* * *

"And take care of yourselves!" "We will, un!" "If any fucking ANBU start to track ya, bring 'em to me, o-fucking-kay?" "And when Hidan's through killing them, can I eat them? **I'm tired of leftovers...**"

Deidara laughed, nodding. "Un, alright, but I doubt we'll run into any ANBU, it's a small village, nothing serious," Deidara said with a smile, slipping into his shoes quickly. Sasori glanced up, watching the small group. "Come on, quit crowding the brat and let him leave now," Sasori said with a smile as Deidara padded along down the hall to the doorway Sasori was waiting at.

"We'll see you in a few hours, un!" "Or late tonight with you sporting a fucking limp!" "Don't encourage Sasori no Danna, Hidan, un," Deidara scolded as Sasori smirked, wrapping an arm around Deidara's waist. "I'll do my best to make sure he can walk back to base on his own," Sasori said with a grin as Deidara playfully slapped Sasori's hand, wiggling out of the grip. "I'm not going to have sex in some random place, un!" "It'd be fucking kinky though!" "Then _you_ do it Hidan, un!" "I fucking have."

"AAHH! RUN AWAY! TO THE VILLAGE, UN!" Deidara cried out, covering his ears and sprinting out of the door. Sasori rolled his eyes, chuckling as he walked out of the door and stepped into Hiruko. "We'll see you soon," Sasori said with a small wave, keeping an eye on the blonde who was flailing his arms, shouting something along the lines of 'mental images' and 'unbelievable lack of dignity'.

Hidan laughed, waving. "See you fucking soon, and take this fucking opportunity, but be back before around three, o-fucking-kay? It's gonna fucking storm, Itachi saw it earlier before he went to fucking check on the little fox runt in Konoha," Hidan said with a shrug. Sasori nodded, closing Hiruko's shell up. "I'll do my best to get home on time then," he said as Hidan rolled his eyes, kicking Hiruko. "You fucking dense puppet, you're too old to get our fucking young jokes, eh?" Sasori raised his eyebrows from inside his puppet, turning Hiruko's head to see Hidan. "What are you saying then?"

Hidan grinned, leaning in. "There's a nice little place Kakuzu and I fucking found, the storm hits around fucking three, make sure to get there, something about the place that gives you some of the best fucks," he whispered softly with a grin. Sasori raised an eyebrow. "I'm listening."

"DANNA, UN! HURRY UP!!"

"Coming Dei!" Sasori called back as he then turned to Hidan. "Where is it?" "Just a bit east of here, south east from the fucking village you're going to. It's in the forest, used to be a fucking place ANBU used when on long missions, but there hasn't been any since the fucking Great War, still works fucking fine though. A bit old school style, but Kakuzu and I gave it some fucking 'additions' you might like. Check the place out," Hidan said with a grin.

Sasori raised an eyebrow. "You haven't used these 'additions'?" "We have, just fucking different ones from yours, you'll find your fucking room." "DANNAAA~!" "Alright, alright! Coming!" Sasori called back. "Thanks for the information," he added softly to Hidan who smirked deviously. "My fucking pleasure."

* * *

Paying for the final item, Deidara gave a long sigh as he looked around for Sasori. "There you are ma'am, that's twenty dollars change, have a nice day," the lady behind the counter said, bowing. Deidara gave her a quick smile, ignoring that he had been called a woman. Sasori seemed to have slipped off again for what could have been the sixth time during their trip. And he had a feeling he knew where the red head had vanished to, _once again_.

Picking up all the groceries he walked out, turning and walking down the road a little, blushing lightly as he paused outside the adult store. Alright, so he'd never been inside one, but he'd seen Sasori making his way here or trying to get in every time the red head had vanished. Who's to say he wasn't already in there?

"_Okay, be brave," _he thought to himself as he slowly walked in; pushing the door open and blushed, feeling, well, needy. Where was Sasori? He swore if there was some kind of aphrodisiac in the air he was going to hurt the puppet. Thinking about said puppet though was only giving him a hard on. He swallowed hard, face red as he moved into the store more, hearing soft voices of couples, trying to spot his partners voice amongst the crowd so he could have his way with him.

Ah, violently of course, in a non pleasurable way. Punish him for making him walk into this stupid place.

Feeling a hand on his shoulder, he spun around, face a dark red. "Good day to you sexy, how can I please you?" the lady in a skimpy maid's outfit purred. Deidara swallowed, moving backwards. "Sorry, I-I'm just looking for a fuck- I- I mean, my fuck- Ah! Master- no, Boyfriend, un!" Deidara couldn't believe how flustered he'd become and was feeling horribly dizzy. The girl merely giggled and took him by the base of his shirt. "Hnn, what's this hottie of yours look like Doll?" "Like that, un!" "Sorry?" "Ah, unn, like, a puppet, um, well, he's red hair… Ah… A very good fuck-" "He's mine."

Deidara snapped out of his flustered rambling's, feeling strong arms wrap around him, one hand gently rubbing and massaging his hardening member through the cloth of his pants, making him moan. "U-Unnn, Danna," he breathed out as he heard Sasori chuckle. "Thank you for finding my little pet, I've payed, I'll be off now. Thank you Miss," Sasori spoke as he started to slowly walk the flustered Deidara out of the store, hands now on Deidara's waist.

"Have a nice day boy's, have fun~!"

The second Deidara had left the store he turned, glaring up at Sasori. "Y-You bought something from there, un!?" Deidara asked in a hushed whisper. "Leaving me like that to worry about you when you're off looking for… Unnn," He couldn't continue, feeling the blood rushing to his cheeks again. "What? You're mad at me Dei-kun?" Sasori purred, making Deidara shiver, whimper and drop the shopping bags carelessly, moving forward to hug Sasori tightly. "You made me all horny and needy, un… In _public_," he whispered softly, face hidden in the red head's chest.

Sasori chuckled, running his fingers softly through Deidara's hair, drawing out small muffled sounds from the blonde. He took a quick moment to glance at the town clock, smirking. Close to three, and almost as if on cue, the rain started. Deidara lifted his head up, blinked and blushed, grabbing his things. "Ah! Damn it! I'm getting wetter than I'd rather be right now, un!" Deidara mumbled as Sasori smirked. "Come on, un! Let's try and get back to base, un! It's only a twenty minute walk, a ten minute run hopefully," Deidara said as he started to move quickly, Sasori following close behind. He could pull out Hiruko and ride safe and dry, but, why bother getting his favourite puppet wet? Besides, everything was going according to plan…

* * *

The rain was pelting down hard and Deidara and Sasori had long since been soaked to the bone. Thunder cracked loudly above them and the rain came down harder. Deidara slowed down his walk further, trembling, food that wasn't in a can or wrapped up and sealed tightly was soaked and useless. The blonde knew that if they stayed out in such conditions they'd get a cold or be struck by some of the lightning which was striking dangerously close to ground level.

And to make things worse, he was still horribly needy for Sasori.

The red head gently gripped Deidara's wrist, making the two stop. "We won't get back to base in time and I've lost all sense of direction, I can't tell if we're heading South or West!" Sasori said loudly over the howling of the wind. Deidara gained a desperate look. "Then where do we go? I don't know which direction the village is anymore! I was following _you_, un!" Deidara shouted back, glancing around, soaked blonde hair flopping in the wind and rain of the storm.

Sasori pointed to his left. "I saw a small house that way, not too far, passed it a minute or so ago! We can stay there for shelter until the storm passes!" Deidara nodded, following his lover closely, moving in and out of trees, trying to keep up with him. Quite soon they reached the house and they paused staring up at it silently. Deidara shook his head, running forward and running up the stairs, dropping the bags and knocking, trembling in the downpour as Sasori moved up to stand beside the blonde. Deidara knocked again, more impatiently this time.

"Oi! Someone in there, un!?" Deidara shouted, growing impatient and simply twisting the door knob, eyes widening as it opened freely. He grabbed the bags, moving inside quickly and then dumping them unceremoniously on the floor, teeth chattering as Sasori shut the door behind the two. Deidara glanced around, blinking. "This is an ANBU safety house, un… Danna we have to leave, we could be killed," Deidara hissed as he glanced over at a corner near a window where it held close to at least a hundred weapons and a thick blood smear in the corner, Jashin's symbol painted on in black.

Deidara blinked, looking around, spotting a fireplace which was rather neat, some cloaks hanging off the sofa and something that reminded him strongly of home. "What happened to the ANBU, un?" Deidara asked Sasori who had already moved to the fireplace and, with ultimate care, started a fire there, moving an iron fence in front of it, removing his cloak and draping it over the iron. "It's been abandoned for many years, since before you were born, Kakuzu and Hidan told me about this place," Sasori explained, removing his shirt and setting it down neatly on the metal.

"Come on, take your clothes off before you get a cold," Sasori said softly, moving his pants off and draping them on the iron as well.

Deidara swallowed hard but moved forward, dropping his coat in a slushy pile on the ground, followed by his shirt. Of course, he was blushing hard, not able to help seeing Sasori now nude and moving and grabbing a blanket from the couch, wrapping it around himself.

Deidara grabbed a sheet as well, wrapping it around himself before dropping his pants and boxers, kicking them off as Sasori placed them on the iron to hang and dry by the fireplace.

Blushing, the blonde looked around, frowning. "So, if Hidan and Kakuzu told you about this place, then you really _did _know where you were going, un. On top of that you lead me here, un!" Deidara spoke with a frown as he tied the sheet around him in a Roman style. Sasori glanced back at the other, giving him an innocent look. "Who? Me? Nooo, I'd never do that to me little Dei-Chan," Sasori purred softly as Deidara frowned, turning away. Sasori chuckled. Perfect, and on top of that, the lady in the Adult store had picked out something nice to burn in the air when Deidara was planned to arrive.

And just like on cue, he did.

"What's wrong Deidara? You're acting like you don't like being here… Alone… With no one but your _Master_," Sasori purred, moving to stand behind Deidara, wrapping his arms slowly around the blonde's waist, hands gently rubbing Deidara's waist, stomach and chest through the cloth he was wearing.

"A-Ah, no… It's not that Danna, un," Deidara moaned out, panting heavily.

Sasori leant down, licking along the skin of Deidara's exposed neck and shoulders. "Then what is it?" Sasori spoke softly before sharply biting into Deidara's neck drawing out a cry from Deidara, blood seeping through the small wound as Sasori began sucking on it greedily.

"A-Ahh! F-Fuck! I… Ahh… Need you t-to fuck me, un!" Deidara spoke shakily, crying out in pleasure again as Sasori chose another spot, biting down hard again and sucking, trailing his tongue along the wound. Deidara was whimpering, moaning and panting hard now, slouching backwards against Sasori, feeling the red head's hard erection pressing into his backside. "I didn't hear you…" Sasori spoke in a husky voice, hand trailing down and gripping Deidara's erection hard through the cloth, giving it a hard squeeze. "Say it louder,"

Deidara screamed out in pleasure. "Fuck me! Fuck me, un! Ahh! Master please! I want to feel you inside of me!" Deidara screamed out, bucking up into Sasori's hand as the red head roughly massaged the blonde's member. Sasori smirked. "Nooo, I feel like playing a game first… I'm in a… A kinky mood _Dei-kun_," Sasori spoke as Deidara moaned loudly, half of pleasure, half of disapproval when Sasori removed his hand from his hard erection, feeling way too close to release.

Sasori turned Deidara around, smirking to see the younger male's expression overwhelmed with lust and want; cheeks dusted a deep red colour. "Wrap your legs around me Deidara, I'll carry you," Sasori spoke softly. Deidara wasted no time in jumping onto Sasori, legs wrapped tightly around the red heads waist, arms around his neck, backside pressing down and rubbing against Sasori's erection. The red head gave a soft moan and groped Deidara's ass hard as he moved quickly out of the room, up the stairs and to a series of doors.

Now Hidan had said he'd recognise his, but, which one was-- Ah, that one. The one with a bird and scorpion carved into the centre of the door.

Sasori swiftly kicked open the door and moved in, smirking deviously to himself. Seemed as if Hidan and Kakuzu had kindly decorated the place too. A nice large king size bed with satin white sheets, a few large comfortable pillows, walls a soft red, floor red as well and the bed post, well, had a few sets of handcuffs hanging off its bars. And of course a nice little mystery drawer which Sasori would take delight in searching through.

"_Perfect…"_ Sasori thought, licking his lips as he lay Deidara down on the bed, crawling on top of him and running his hands up to the knot the blonde had tied on his makeshift robe, all but tearing the cloth from him and parted it to reveal the smooth silky white skin beneath.

Gripping Deidara's wrists he raised them above his head, handcuffing them together before locking them to the bed post. The blonde glanced up and whimpered. "Ahh, Danna, not handcuffs, un," he spoke softly, giving the other a soft, flustered and begging look. Sasori smiled deviously, making Deidara shiver.

"Now let's see what Master has to play with," Sasori mused, making Deidara shiver and moan.

"Oh please Danna, not now, just take me, un. Please, un," Deidara begged softly, arching his back lightly as Sasori smirked, pulling open a drawer.

He glanced down at its contents, and at the sight of Sasori's smirk Deidara could tell there was something not-so-innocent in there. The red head shuffled through before he pulled out an unused bottle of lubricant, turning so his back was to the blonde, uncapping it and starting to spread it over something. Deidara bit his lip, growing very nervous and needy, whimpering softly. "Wh-what are you doing? Danna, un? Please, don't make me wait, un!" Deidara begged softly, watching as the lubricant and that 'something else' was placed down and a long black silky piece of cloth was pulled out and his eyes widened in fear.

"No! Not a blindfold, Danna, come on, un! Please!" Deidara begged softly as Sasori crawled onto the other, straddling his hips roughly, making the blonde shut his eyes tight and moan loudly as their erections rubbed against each other. "But you just look so tempting and beautiful when you're bound and helpless," Sasori whispered, gently untying Deidara's hair, golden locks falling gently around his shoulders and framing his face. Sasori brushed the blonde's fringe away, looking down into the blonde's lusty, needy and begging eyes before covering them with the silk blindfold, earning a soft whimper as he tied it behind the blonde's head.

Deidara was trembling softly, hands shut tightly around the handcuffs, occasionally tugging and trying to see how tight they were. After a while though he stopped, knowing it was just wasted energy.

More shuffling was heard and Sasori paused before a slight _pop_ of a bottle opening was heard. "Deidara my beautiful slave… Open your mouth for your Master," Sasori purred.

Deidara shivered and couldn't help but open his mouth at the tone Sasori used. Whatever that stuff from the shop was it had affected the red head as well it seemed, not just him.

When a hot liquid ran onto his tongue, Deidara tried to pull back, groaning as Sasori's hand cupped his cheek, forcing his head to stay still. "Drink it, I'd never give you anything that would hurt you Dei-Chan," Sasori spoke as Deidara shuddered and drank the hot liquid on his tongue, moaning loudly as Sasori ran a hand down his chest.

"Ah, let's test this now, shall we?" Sasori spoke, ghosting a hand down Deidara's chest and stomach, earning loud moans from the blonde, arching his back into the touch. Sasori roughly gripped Deidara's member, causing a loud scream to tear from Deidara's throat before he was left panting, gasping for breath. "A-AH! D-Danna! Wh-What did y-you give m-me, unn!?" Deidara cried out, still writhing from the last touch, toes curling in pleasure as Sasori gave his member a long lick from base to tip, drawing yet another scream.

"A little aphrodisiac, something to make you more sensitive," Sasori explained softly, picking something else up.

"Oh Danna, please, I need you n- AHH!!" Deidara was cut off by a loud scream, tears now running down his face as he gave small sobs, as something large, but nowhere near as large as Sasori's cock, was shoved roughly into him. The thing that Sasori had been lubricating before. Deidara arched his back, trying to move away from the thing shoved inside of him, whimpering and sobbing softly, the pain so incredibly intense. "D-Danna it hurts, un, it hurts. Take it out, please, it's hurting, un!" Deidara cried, writhing and twisting, turning his head from side to side in an attempt to knock off the blindfold, trying so desperately to move off the object.

"Shh, it's okay my love, hold still, you'll feel good in a minute…"

Deidara lay still, sobbing and trembling. "Danna, I don't like it, please, take it out of me, whatever the hell it is, un, get it out of me!" he begged softly. Sasori smirked and leant down, flicking a switch on it, making it start to vibrate softly and slowly, causing a scream to tear from the blonde again, this time of pleasure, recognising what it was.

A vibrator.

He slowly started to rock his hips, trying to push it a little deeper, bucking his hips occasionally, panting hard and moaning loudly as Sasori watched hungrily, licking his lips and started to move the vibrator in and out of the blonde slowly, drawing long loud moans from Deidara went it brushed his prostate softly. "Oh Danna~ Ohhh, oh yes, unnn! Danna!" Deidara moaned loudly, groaning in pleasure as it was pressed up hard against his prostate.

Sasori flicked another switch and the vibrator started to twist, rotating the head to continuously hit Deidara's Prostate over and over again, making the blonde scream over and over in pleasure as the vibrations became more frequent and harder when the dial was slowly turned. Sasori licked his lips as he watched, the blonde was beautiful, and best of all, he was moaning _his _name.

"Deidara," Sasori purred, leaning in, "If I unchain you, you won't run away will you?" Deidara shook his head, moaning loudly, a thin line of drool coming from the corner of his mouth. "And will you obey your Master's wishes?" Deidara nodded, moaning loudly. "Say it Dei, are you going to be a good boy?" Sasori teased, running his hands fleetingly up and down Deidara's neglected member. "U-Uuuuun! Y-Yes Da-haaa! Dannaa! I-I will, unnn!" The blonde moaned out loudly.

Sasori smirked as he pulled out a metal ring, and flicking a little lock and making it open wide. "Use the Vibrator, touch yourself, entertain me, give me a good show my little pet," Sasori purred into the others ear as he clipped the cock ring closed, making Deidara whine and whimper loudly and begging like. "Entertain me well enough, and when you want to cum, beg me for it," he breathed as he then unclipped the two handcuffs, freeing the blonde's hands before leaning back.

He watched, close to drooling as with one hand Deidara gripped the vibrator, starting to thrust it quick and hard inside himself, the other hand slowly swallowing his cock with the hand mouth, licking, sucking and nipping along, making him practically scream Sasori's name and arch his back thanks to the high sensitivity, the pleasure bouncing back as it hit the cock ring, forming a growing pool of pleasure that had no release, making it torturous yet pleasurable at the same time.

Sasori was amazed and so strongly aroused watching Deidara pleasure himself, licking his lips hungrily. It seemed like the blonde was indeed desperate for pleasure as the blindfold he'd objected to strongly wasn't even touched when the handcuffs came off. Even the cock ring was in place.

It seemed that the kinky mood had rubbed off onto the blonde as well.

"Ahh! Oh GOD, UNNN! Danna! Ah! Y-Yes, unnn! I-I need release! Please Da-AHH-Danna, unnn!" Deidara practically screamed out.

Sasori smirked.

"Beg for it."

"Ahh! I need to cum, please!"

"Come on Dei, better, beg like you mean it."

"AHH! FUCK! Let me c-cum! I need t-to! Please, un! I- I want you to fuck m-AHH! FUCK ME! AH GOD DANNA, UN!"

Sasori groaned softly as he watched Deidara jerking himself off roughly, vibrator thrusting hard into himself, making him scream in pleasure, a thin line of drool running from the corner of his mouth still. Sasori captured those plump red lips in a heated kiss as he reached down, running his finger along the base of Deidara's erection, making him moan loudly into Sasori's mouth.

"Since you were such a good boy, Danna will do this for his little Dei-Chan," Sasori whispered against Deidara's lips. Reaching down on the underside, he unclipped the cock ring, hearing Deidara scream in pleasure barely a second afterwards, releasing hard onto his own hand, moaning long, the vibrator now stopped from thrusting in and out of him.

Sasori watched the other orgasm, usually having one himself at the same time the blonde was, and he loved watching the face of pure pleasure the blonde made, and the blush of ecstasy, the way his lips parted enough to gasp in air, breathing silent moans of silent pleasure.

This only served to make Sasori more turned on; especially when he noticed that the blonde's erection was still up thanks to the aphrodisiac. Pulling out the vibrator, Sasori watched as Deidara moaned softly, hands reaching up to shakily push the blindfold up and glancing up at Sasori with lust filled eyes. "Unn Danna," he breathed softly as the red head started to kiss along the others neck, leaving behind a long trail of dark blooming hickeys which would certainly not go unnoticed by the loud immortal.

"Deidara," Sasori breathed huskily, "Get my cock nice and lubricated."

Deidara shivered and moaned, sitting up shakily, pushing Sasori across to a sitting position as well as he glanced around briefly. Where was the- Ah, he found it. Uncapping the small bottle, he briefly glanced at the other contents of the drawer and swore he nearly had a nosebleed thinking what Sasori could do to him with all of those toys.

He squeezed a fair amount of lubricant into his hands and onto his fingers, purposefully giving them gentle squeezes and running his fingers along each other, making sure the lube got everywhere. Deidara moved forward, leaning down and fisted Sasori's large erect member, slowly moving his hands up and down the shaft, spreading the lubricant and making Sasori throw his head back and groan loudly.

"My, my Danna, you're so hard, un," Deidara breathed teasingly.

Sasori only groaned in response, bucking his hips lightly into Deidara's hands as they worked along him, the tongues occasionally licking and teasing the slit, making him moan more.

"I'm surprised you fit in my nice hot, tight-" "That's it Deidara, shut up," The red head cut off, pushing Deidara backwards roughly, the blonde looking up at Sasori and smirked. "Unn, I'm love it when you're rough, un," he purred as he ran his hands down his body, leaving a light shining trail of lubricant where his fingers had touched. With a growl Sasori shot out his Chakra strings, making the teen beneath him whine.

"Oh my precious Dei," Sasori breathed, nipping and kissing more hickeys on the blonde's collarbone. Deidara moaned softly.

"For teasing me so much, I'm going to take you nice and hard and rough," he whispered softly, making Deidara groan loudly as the red head twitch his fingers lightly. The chakra strings attached to his body made him shift, turning him over so he was kneeling on his hands and knees. Sasori ran a hand along the blonde's back, waist and the final ass, groping it and smirked at the soft moan, moving himself behind Deidara, leaning over so he was gently resting against Deidara's back, feeling the soft trembles of anticipation from the young blonde.

"Perfect, so perfect," Sasori moaned softly, licking the edge of Deidara's ear, nibbling on it softly. "Ahh, Danna, please, take me now, un," Deidara begged softly, gripping the sheets beneath him tightly, closing his eyes, waiting for the piercing pain and pleasure to strike.

Sasori chuckled low in his throat, making Deidara shiver again as he teased Deidara's ear with his teeth.

"So impatient…"

Deidara groaned, hanging his head softly and whining. "Danna~ You are too, un," Deidara breathed out as Sasori smirked and straightened up slightly. "Good point."

Deidara let out a loud scream of pain and pleasure as Sasori thrust in hard and fast without warning, sheathing himself completely inside Deidara's tight heat. "A-Ah, Dei," Sasori breathed, wrapping his arms around Deidara's waist gently.

"Move Danna."

"So soon?"

"Ah damnit! I'm horny, well prepared and in a fucking kinky mood. Fuck me damnit!"

"As you wish Dei."

Sasori pulled out most of the way only to thrust back in softly and slowly, making Deidara groan out loudly in frustration. "Ahh! Harder! Faster! Fuck! Pound me into the bed, unn!" Deidara commanded lightly. "Hnn? Harder?" Sasori teased, pulling almost all the way out slowly before thrusting back in hard, hitting Deidara's prostate dead on, making him scream out loudly in pleasure.

"Fuck! Harder! More! More! Fuck me! Unnn Master!"

Sasori groaned, thrusting in hard and fast, gripping Deidara's hips with bruising force, listening to the screams that Deidara gave out from the pleasure coursing through him. After a few hard thrusts Sasori collided with Deidara's prostate with such force the blonde let out the loudest scream Sasori swore he'd ever heard from the blonde, watching as the younger male's hands caved out beneath him, now supporting himself on his elbows, bucking backwards lightly, body useless and in too much pleasure to even move.

Sasori released the chakra strings on the blonde to concentrate on thrusting harder and faster, earning more pleasured screams from the blonde. He could feel the blonde beneath him getting close, the walls tightening around his member even further, making him groan loudly as well, reaching beneath Deidara to fist his member roughly, pumping hard and fast in time with the thrusts.

"A-Ahh, yes! Dei, c-cum for me! Ahh! Nice and hard, oh Dei~!" Sasori moaned loudly. The blonde panted hard screaming Sasori's name in pure pleasure as he came, arms giving out completely as he collapsed, burying his face in his arms, panting harshly, ass still in the air as Sasori pounded into him a bit more before crying out in pleasure as well, releasing deep inside Deidara.

Collapsing onto the blonde, Sasori lay still, panting hard, white dots blinding his vision for what felt like ages. Swallowing slightly and licking his dry lips, muddy-red eyes glanced down at the blonde beneath him, body glittering lightly in the light with a thin sheet of sweat.

He pulled out gently, groaning as he watched his seed trail down Deidara's creamy white thighs as he lay down, pulling Deidara close to his chest.

"Ah Danna… That was… Ah fuck… So hot… Unn…" Deidara breathed softly against Sasori's chest as Sasori chuckled. "Hidan did say… This place gave… Some of the best fucks," Sasori spoke softly as Deidara grinned lazily, chuckling happily. "Oh hell yeah, we're coming back here, un," Deidara said softly as he opened his eyes with a cheeky grin. Sasori copied the blonde's smile, stroking his hair.

"Of course Deidara."

* * *

Hidan frowned, glancing up at the clock. With a grumble, he crossed his arms, frowning. "What is it Hidan-Sama?" Tobi chirped. "Shut the fuck up Lollipop. And it's way past nine and Sasori and Deidara aren't fucking back yet," Hidan mumbled. "Maybe they're spending some time at the little 'resort'?" Kakuzu's low voice suggested from beside the albino.

Hidan snorted, rolling his eyes. "Come the fuck on, Deidara's such a princess, he'd never sleep there when it's only a twenty minute walk from Base to that fucking place," Hidan spoke. Kakuzu rolled his eyes. "Unless of course he wants a sore ass," Hidan added with a mumbled.

"I heard that," Hiruko's voice spoke and Hidan blinked, grinning. "Well? Did you fucking like it?" "Loved it," Sasori responded as Hidan laughed, standing and looking around. "Where's Dei-Chan?"

"In here, un," Hiruko's voice responded again.

Hidan blinked, staring dumbfounded at the small shell of a puppet, bending over as it clicked open, peaking inside.

Deidara was seating comfortably in Sasori's lap, arms wrapped around the red head's neck, blushing heavily. Hidan burst into fits of laughter, falling over backwards as Sasori stood, holding the blonde in his arms bridal style. "Shut up Hidan, un," Deidara mumbled, looking away, "I can't walk." This only increased Hidan's hysterics making him quite literally roll around laughing.

Deidara turned back, glaring as Hidan managed to force himself up. "Okay, okay, oh fuck… Ah _fuck _that's fucking hilarious! Aha! Oh Jashin-Lord! Dei-Chan look at your fucking neck! It's all hickeys! All down even under your fucking shirt! Oh fuck!" Deidara glared at the silver haired male as he collapsed to the floor again.

"So why are you so late? The storm finished hours ago Sasori, it only went from three until five. It's almost ten now," Kakuzu spoke as he stood up. This time it was the red head's turn to blush. "We were having sex." "For almost seven hours?? That whole time?" "Yeah."

Regardless, Hidan quite literally died laughing after being stabbed in the head by one of the embarrassed blonde's kunai.

* * *

**_*Grips nose and grabs a tissue* Ah fuck, okay, that was, like, extremely hard to write and I think it came out terribly, personally. Worst Lemon I've ever written. Debatable? What do you think about it? Drop me a review to let me know if I should pump up my ego a bit more, as it kinda burst when I finished writing this Chapter. It's got good points and the Lemon's okay, but not what I'd like myself to write *Sigh* Oh well, Lemon as promised. Also as Promised, the next chapter being three quarters way through the story (What?? Nearly finished??? D: ) it's about to start getting dark, depressing and angsty. Get your tissue boxes ready. (NO! Don't you dare! I want a happy ending fic! HAPPY!!! *Arm flails and cries*) Without letting too much of the spoiler, I think I myself will start crying soon as I have to start re-watching and re-reading episodes and Chapters of Naruto Shippuden to get some of the facts as correct as possible. So yes, there will be spoilers -.- And I know that some scenes I'm going to write will have me fumbling for keys on the keyboard while I search for the right letter through my tears. ALL THE WARNING AND HINTS I'M GIVING OUT! Once again, sorry for taking so long, read and review if you liked it, or hated it and want to give me a little giggle by flaming :p See you next Chapter and hopefully sooner :3_**


	15. Chapter 15

_**Guess who's back? (OMG! TWISTED! YOU'RE ALIVE!) Yep! Even through school studies, I'm still alive and still typing I Choose My Life. (How the fuck do you do it? Don't you have two types of Maths?!?) Yeah, work load is a bit tough, I'm quite lucky I'm a fast learner, and on top of that, get my work done fast, so that gives me more time to type :3 (Yay! Talk more about the story now Twisted! Authors aren't supposed to have lives outside their Fanfictions!) Well, most of you could see this coming I guess, some might be surprised, but I think I gave too much away in my A/N at the end of last Chapter. (Wh-What?! What'd you do!?) Like I said, it's not going to be happy, it will be sad from now on, I've used the last of the light-fluffy-happy moments in this Chapter, there's few of them here, and they're the last ones. (You suck. Seriously, you suck. Making it sad. Fail.) So I guess it depends on how easily you can cry, but just in case, have tissues nearby, this Chapter isn't the saddest but it does involve a bit of tear-summoning. (Shut up! Let us read! *Shoves Twisted aside* Enjoy Chapter Fifteen of I Choose My Life!) **_

* * *

_**Chapter Fifteen**_

Sasori slowly opened his eyes. He didn't feel as exhausted the next day as he should after a night of sex. Ever since the blonde had turned seventeen, the two spent almost each night making love. Of course, the other Akatsuki members hated it, but the two loved it.

But the difference between last night and the months before after getting an aphrodisiac for the blonde, Sasori found himself needed to take some as well to feel pleasure at a normal level. What was worse was the night before he'd taken as much as possible and felt nothing. Nothing at all. His eyes closed sadly. How was he going to break the news to his young lover? This was going to hurt him a lot. How would Deidara react? Sad? Angry? Distressed? A form of hysterics? How far would this hurt him?

Sasori forced his eyes open this time and sat up, seeing that the bed was empty aside from him. It had been made neatly around Sasori's body, so he knew Deidara was most likely in the kitchen eating or in the lounge room talking to the others or watching television. He had to tell him, there was no choice, he'd find out sooner or later.

He began to walk to the door when it opened on its own, finding Konan standing there, blinking in shock. "Ah, you're up Sasori," She said softly. The red head frowned and nodded. "Of course I'm up," he said softly as Konan bit her lip worriedly before nodding. "Of course, of course… We've just been a bit worried," Konan said dismissively, moving out of the room. "Deidara! Sasori's awake!"

"Danna?!"

Sasori frowned, watching as Deidara ran in, almost knocking Konan over as he dove at the red head in a hug; gripping him tightly and nuzzling the others neck softly. Sasori smiled softly, stroking Deidara's hair. "Deidara, you're almost taller than me now, I don't think I can support the both of us when you run at me anymore," Sasori spoke as Deidara lifted his head up, glancing at Sasori and pouted. "No fair, I'm happy to see you up and you scold me for showing my love and affection, un?" Deidara mumbled, letting go and crossing his arms with a pout.

Sasori sighed. "No, I didn't expect it, I don't know how much force you'll use," Sasori said softly as Deidara blinked in confusion. "Danna, you know how hard I hug and you know my run up hugs, un," Deidara spoke. Konan gave a small cough from the doorway and the two artists turned to look at her. "Um, Sasori, coffee?" she asked softly as the red head shook his head. "No, share it with the others, I don't need it anymore," Sasori said softly.

"But Danna, I know you're not a morning person, how are you going to wake yourself up now after our nights of fun, un~?" Deidara teased as Konan sighed, turning around. "Call me when I can film it, otherwise I don't want to hear," she spoke, giving a small wave and walking off down the hall, leaving the door half open.

Deidara smiled after her before turning to Sasori. "Maybe you just don't feel like coffee, I mean, you must be awake enough, you've been asleep for over a day, un," the blonde said as he reached up, adjusting his ponytail slightly.

Ah. That's why Deidara wasn't lying in bed beside him; someone must have pulled him out or asked him to let the red head sleep.

"Well, come on, I made lunch for you, un, well, for me but I can share, I'm not that hungry after all, un," he said with a smile as he took Sasori's hand and gave it a tug, surprised that he was halted. He turned around and gave Sasori's arm another tug and smirked up at Sasori's expressionless face.

"Hnn, not in the mood for coffee or food are you, un? Easily fixed, I can make you nice and tired," Deidara purred as he wrapped his arms around Sasori's shoulders, nibbling on the others neck. Sasori gently sighed and placed a hand on Deidara's forehead, pushing him up softly, making the blonde blink.

"Danna… Is… Is something wrong, un?"

Sasori glanced down. "It could be 'wrong', but, it depends on how you look at it," Sasori said softly and slowly. He didn't want to chance saying this too quickly, he had to make sure Deidara understood this and didn't react badly to it.

But bad was rated on a scale from sobbing to becoming rather violent, and he dared not think of anything worse just yet.

"_I want to be just like my art, un…"_

Sasori shut his eyes, forcing the memory away. It didn't hurt as much as he remembered it did. Deidara was now getting worried, the worry showing through into his shaky smile. "Wh-What are you talking about, un? Do you have a fever? I-I'll take care of you, un," Deidara said softly, brushing away Sasori's fringe and feeling his forehead, placing a hand against his own forehead and waited. With each passing second the blonde's worry showed more and more on his face.

"Danna… You're not warm… I… I'm warmer than you, un…" Deidara stuttered, moving his hands away as Sasori stared at Deidara softly. "Dei, listen to me, this will be hard to understand so you have to listen carefully, okay?" Sasori spoke as Deidara's eyes widened slowly, tears starting to appear. "Danna?"

"Deidara, a long time ago, my parents were killed. In my grief as a child, I used my puppetry skills that my grandmother Chiyo had taught me and used a Jutsu on myself to turn into a puppet."

"No… No, un…"

"It takes a long time to become fully puppet, and when it's done, it's irreversible."

"I… I don't believe you, un…"

"Deidara. I'm a full puppet now. I can't feel anything."

The shock hit Deidara hard, staring wide eyed at the puppet but refusing to let tears fall this time. "No, you're lying, un… You can feel… You feel me right? You feel for me? Y-You said you love me! You love me! It's a feeling, un! You can feel!" Deidara said quickly, desperation in his voice. Sasori looked at Deidara with as much sadness as he could show and Deidara choked on his tears, covering his mouth as he started to tremble.

"S-Say it… Say it, un… Say you love me," Deidara whispered, dropping his hand lightly, biting his knuckles nervously. "I love you Deidara." "NO! Properly, un! Like you mean it! Like you used to, un!" Deidara shouted, face turning to anger. "Deidara, I don't feel-" "NO! SHUT UP! SHUT UP DANNA! I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT! YOU'RE LYING! YOU DO LOVE ME! SAY IT, UN! SAY IT!" Deidara screamed, moving forward and gripping Sasori's shirt by the collar. "I can't-" Sasori's words were cut off as Deidara sharply punched his cheekbone, staining the delicate creamy wood with red.

Deidara's eyes widened as Sasori turned back to face the blonde, a frown on his face. "Deidara. Grow up, don't lose your temper at everything that doesn't agree with you, I can't feel a thing and you will just have to deal with it," Sasori spoke as Deidara scowled.

"Fuck you Danna! You can't think I won't be fucking mad, un! I thought it was all a simple Kekkei Genkai like my hands! I… I didn't think this would be fucking permanent and make this happen to you, un! I would have done something to stop it, un!"

"You're being selfish Deidara. Even if you knew before, you couldn't have done anything to stop it."

"Yes I fucking could have, un! Y-You have no idea… You have _NO_ idea how much this is hurting right now! I fucking fell in love with you, I let you fuck me, I thought we could last together for such a long time! I wanted to be with you until we died, un!" Deidara shouted back, tears brimming at his eyes as he ignored the blood dripping from his knuckles.

Sasori scowled, stepping forward and slapping Deidara hard on the cheek, sending him crashing to the ground, sitting in shock. "There is nothing you could do or could have done ever. How was I supposed to know you'd love me? All I've ever thought of you was as a brat, a nuisance and a hindrance. The second I saw you I hated you and it was your fault for everything!"

Deidara stared up at Sasori, trembling.

"It was your fault for falling in love with me when I showed from the start I didn't want a relationship on good terms with you!"

"_It's hurting…"_ A hand reached up slowly to gently touch the place where Sasori had hit, wincing lightly.

"I never wanted you! If it wasn't for Pein-Sama and Konan, you would still be in that house with your parents being tortured, or even dead! You're lucky we even kept you alive for this long!"

"_Oh god, please, make this pain stop…" _The blue eyes turned back to look up at his enraged Master, quivering.

"You're lucky for everything you ungrateful _brat_! All the shit you put us through! All your stupid failed missions have cost Akatsuki so much! Your stupid emotions, your stupid health, you are nothing but a burden!"

"_It's hurting! Stop it! Make it stop!"_ He couldn't believe his Master would say such things to him. He was petrified, why was Sasori so angry? It scared him, oh god, it was scary. He'd never seen this side of Sasori before.

"Sometimes I've just wish that you would never have come here. Sometimes I think you're better off _dead_!"

Deidara's eyes widened in shock and a single tear rolled down his cheek, the room silent as Sasori glared at the blonde in anger. He didn't do anything, simply watched as the blonde jumped up and ran. Just ran. He didn't know where he was running, but he had to go. Tears were now running down his face quickly.

"_Sometimes I think you're better off _dead_!"_

The words choked Deidara and he grabbed a kunai from the lounge room table. Hidan looked up, frowning. "Oi, fucker, what's wrong? I heard shout- Oi! OI!" Hidan shouted, diving up as Deidara tore his shirt open, hooking the kunai under the first thread of stitching on the mouth. Hidan reached over and grabbed his arm. "L-Let go, un!" "Fucking hell! What's wrong with you?!" Deidara simply gave up and began sobbing, the hand holding the kunai dropping it to the floor with a clatter as his other hand gripped Hidan's upper arm and he sobbed against him.

The pale albino was shocked but slowly loosened his grip on Deidara's wrist which instantly went to hold him tight. Hidan frowned but then his face became gentle and he sighed. He looked around and then sat himself down on the sofa again, pulling Deidara down to sit beside him, holding him gently and rubbing his back soothingly. "Let it all out, then tell me what the fuck's wrong," Hidan said gently, letting Deidara grip his shoulders tightly with his fingernails, surely drawing blood.

Blinking, Hidan softly tugged Deidara into a sitting position after a few minutes, looking at the red, tear stained cheeks. "What happened? What did ol' ginger say to you to make you cry? You know what he says, you're too beautiful to cry, a smile's better on you," Hidan said softly with a smile. Hidan wasn't often this kind or concerned with others well being, or even went without saying the word 'fuck' at least once in each sentence, but this seemed to be one of those rare exceptions. Deidara's weak mental string was quivering and threatening to snap, and Hidan didn't quite like where that could lead afterwards, but he was sure it would involve one word he didn't want to hear at the moment.

'Katsu'.

Deidara sniffed, rubbing his eyes, brushing his fringe away so he could rub his other eye. "D-Danna… I'm a burden… Burden, un… Have to die, un," Deidara whispered, hiccupping as he sobbed, reaching over towards the kunai again, only to have Hidan grip his wrist and tug him back to lean against him. "No, you don't have to die, what the hell gave you that idea?" "T-Told me, un…" "Who told you?" "Danna, un." "What the fuck? Why?"

This only brought forth more tears and Hidan sighed as he rubbed Deidara's back. He'd need help to sooth the blonde; he wasn't very good at this. He blushed lightly, looking away. He couldn't really do this when Deidara was a child, and he'd always find Konan. She was a mother like figure to so many in the group. He remembered her watching over all of the younger members in turn. Deidara, Itachi before him, even himself when he was still a teenager. He remembered Konan was quite good with young people, even got Hidan himself to cry onto her shoulder from the guilt of murder one day, and he rarely expressed emotions himself.

* * *

"_Deidara?" _

_The little blonde sniffed, wiping his eyes with his small fists, standing trembling at her doorway, wearing his oversized shirt, crying softly, face hidden by his hands and hair and shadows. Konan's face softened and she smiled, walking over to the young seven year old and picked him up, walking to the bed and sitting back down with the blonde in her lap, arms around her neck and crying into her shoulder._

"_What's wrong Dei-Dear, have a nightmare?" She asked softly, rubbing his back. The blonde shook his head. It was almost midnight, so Konan had to wonder why the small boy was up. "Couldn't sleep, un," came the soft muffled voice of the blonde. Konan smiled gently as she gently stroked Deidara's hair, trying to sooth him. She blinked, glancing up at the doorway to see another shadowed figure._

"_Itachi?"_

"_I heard him crying, I thought I'd take him to you," the raven haired teen explained. Sasori was out on a mission and had been for a few days, but no one had decided to move the blonde from the red head's room, perhaps it was the absence of the flame haired male that had caused Deidara to act like this? Konan smiled, nodding as she softly kissed Deidara's forehead, shifting so she could lean against the wall, gesturing for Itachi to come into the room as well. "Now, now, Deidara. You've worried Itachi; you need to calm down, what was so scary that it made you cry?" Konan asked softly as Itachi crawled onto the bed, sitting beside Konan and watching the blonde._

"_Shadows, un."_

_Konan smiled and glanced over to a lamp. "Ah, the shadows scared you? Did you see _them_ in the shadows?"_

"_Un." She knew she was right and gestured for Itachi to get the lit lamp. When the raven got her the lamp she placed it beside her and tapped Deidara's shoulder. The blonde looked up and blinked, tears running down his face as Konan smiled gently. "There's no reason to be scared of shadows, shadows can be your friends," She said as Deidara blinked, sniffling and wiped his eyes in a child-like fashion. "Watch," she said as she gently let go of Deidara, moving her hands together to make a dog on the wall with the shadows. _

_Deidara gasped, reaching out to touch it as Konan smiled, changing her hands and moving to make a rooster, making rooster noises softly, earning a little giggle from the blonde. "Uh-oh! What have we here? Here comes a fox!" Konan spoke, making little growling noises as Deidara laughed and clapped, placing his hand over the fox shadow on the wall. Konan made little gasping noises, making the fox twist on the wall. "Oh wow! Good work Dei-Chan! You caught the fox!" She said as Deidara laughed, gripping the wall with both hands. She smiled, changing the shape into a bird, the blonde cooing softly at it. "That's right, a birdie, quick, let go so it can be free and fly," Konan said as the blonde moved his arms away quickly, holding them in the air as he watched the bird shadow fly up the wall before vanishing._

_Konan smiled as Deidara pouted, looking down at his hands. "Can I make a bird, un?" She smiled and nodded. "Like this Dei-Chan," She said softly, helping Deidara make the shape. Excitedly, he moved his hands to the light and grinned happily as he made the bird fly, grinning brightly as Konan wiped the last of the drying tears away._

_It didn't take long before the blonde soon grew tired and ended up falling asleep in Konan's lap as she cradled him, his head resting against her chest, listening to her heartbeat. She wrapped him in a blanket gently and smiled at Itachi. "You're here as well; would you like to sleep here tonight? Must be lonely in your room without Kisame," She said gently as Itachi blushed lightly, nodding and crawling over more, resting his head on Konan's shoulder._

_She was truly a mother like figure._

* * *

Standing carefully, Hidan gently took Deidara's hand, helping him stand, listening to the quiet sobs. He moved in front of Deidara, bending down, holding his arms out behind him. "Come on Dei-Chan, climb on, I'll carry you to Konan," Hidan said softly as Deidara carefully wrapped his arms around Hidan's neck, burying his face in the others shoulder and back, Hidan's arms gripping the blonde's legs as he started to walk.

Glancing up slightly to see Deidara still holding on and still trembling he turned his red-violet eyes to the way they were going. He passed Deidara and Sasori's room, seeing the red head briefly, sitting on his bed, face in hands and hunched over, silent, blades sticking out of his back, flexing slowly in what could be sadness or fury, Hidan wasn't quite sure which.

Reaching Pein and Konan's room he gave it a sharp kick, hearing a sigh from within. "What do you want Hidan?"

He was the only one to kick the door instead of knocking or calling out when his hands were full or severed. "Konan-Bitch, Deidara fucking needs you," Hidan shouted, shifting his feet lightly as he lifted Deidara up a bit more. The door slowly parted to reveal Konan frowning lightly, looking up at the blonde on Hidan's back before glancing to the immortal himself who mouthed out 'Fight' to her. She nodded and gently reached up, stroking Deidara's cheek softly. "It's okay Dei-Dear, come inside and tell me, I'll help you out," she spoke softly as Hidan slowly let the trembling blonde down who instantly latched himself on to Konan, crying harder again. "Shh, shh, it's okay, it's okay, come on Dei, no need to cry," she spoke softly, giving a gentle smile and mouthing 'Thank you' to Hidan before shutting the door.

Hidan stared silently at the door, listening as Konan whispered soft comforting words to Deidara who was once again sobbing hard, and most likely clinging to Konan desperately. _"For fucks sake,"_ Hidan thought as he started to walk off before frowning. Sasori. What _had_ that puppet said or done to upset Deidara to the point where he'd want to unstitch the mouth. To attempt _suicide_?

Hidan remembered the blonde always smiling. Always being happy. It seemed quite recently that the smile was fading. The sanity level? He shook his head as he slowly turned; starting to walk in the direction of the artists shared room.

"_Then again, I'd be pretty fucked up if I'd come from Deidara's past, congratulations to him for fucking smiling at all,"_ Hidan thought. He crossed his arms lightly, scowling as he kicked the door open, glaring at the red haired puppet who only lifted his head to glare at Hidan.

"What?"

The puppet's voice was strict, harsh and filled with fury and his muddy coloured eyes reflected this.

Hidan scowled, eyes dark and narrowed as he stepped into the room, slamming the door shut behind him. This made Sasori's blades perk up as he stood, staring at the immortal in front of him. "Fucker, what'd you do?" "I don't understand what you're saying." "Fuck off, you know damn well what the fuck I'm talking about." "No, I don't." "Fucker! Deidara! That's what I'm fucking talking about you giant dick! What the fuck did you do to him to fucking make him _cry_?!"

Sasori frowned, shutting his eyes. He needed a moment to think, he couldn't enrage Hidan because that would lead to a fight and then things would be broken, destroyed, his wooden body would get scratched and Hidan would end up dead. That would leave Sasori to explain to the platinum haired male's lover and his own close friend _why _he'd killed him. He didn't want to deal with that. Too much trouble, it wasn't worth it, even if Hidan would come back to life.

"Listen, all I told Deidara was the truth," Sasori said softly as Hidan scoffed. "Come off it bitch, what the fuck did you say?!" Hidan said loudly. Sasori was becoming frustrated, the immortal male's voice was growing louder by the second and that would certainly attract attention. "Hidan, shut up for a moment." "FUCKING MAKE ME! For fuck's sake! Do you know what the fuck it means when someone has a fucking low mental stability?! It fucking means anything can trigger insanity!" Hidan shouted before growling angrily, gripping his hair.

"When you go insane, you don't fucking come back! Deidara's fucking pushing it, I'm surprised he lasted this long! And you-" Hidan paused to point a threatening finger at Sasori "-Fucking try and _push _these boundaries! What the _fuck_ are you testing?!" Hidan shouted before dropping his hands to his side, taking in deep breaths as he watched Sasori stare down guiltily.

"You're fucking lucky to have him."

Sasori looked up, seeing Hidan's face looking worried, angry and remorseful. "If I wasn't waiting there for my food to cool down… If I was in my room, or eating in the kitchen, or in the bathroom, maybe even if I'd forgotten some spice… Fuck… If I wasn't there," Hidan laughed bitterly and shook his head before looking up at Sasori again.

"He tried to kill himself."

The words hit Sasori hard, but not as much as he remembered. How they'd send a panic through him at the thought. How he'd feel tears at his eyes at the thought of his beautiful young lover cold and lifeless. How he'd want to destroy everything and himself just to get to where Deidara was.

No, it wasn't that, just him telling himself to feel it was like he was being manipulated by a computer, by someone else.

"Suicide?" Sasori repeated softly, blinking as he stared at Hidan he groaned. "Yeah. Grabbed a kunai, tore off his shirt and started to tear the stitching. Fucking lucky I was there or he'd be dead, along with the fucking rest of us if that bomb had gone off," Hidan spoke as he crossed his arms over his bare chest. He gave a heavy sigh and frowned more, red-violet eyes staring hard at Sasori. "What the fuck _did_ you say to him?"

"I'm a puppet… A pure puppet… I… I can no longer feel a thing," Sasori said as Hidan's eyes widened lightly, mouth parting in slight shock. "He got distressed, demanded I tell him I love him. I did my best to put feeling behind it, but, I couldn't, the tones in my voice aren't right, I'm not used to this, it came out so… Dead…" Sasori sighed and slumped on the bed, blades retracting as Hidan shuffled his feet nervously. "So he just went through fucking shock?" "No, I hurt him. I don't know why I thought that by hurting him and pushing him away it would make it better," Sasori said, staring at the ground.

_Thump-Thump… Thump-Thump…_

God, why was his heart beating so loud right now. Why was it all he could hear?

"You fucking hurt him? On purpose?!"

_Thump-Thump… Thump-Thump…_

Something was missing, it was crying, it was hurting so badly. It was killing him slowly. Was this how the blonde had felt after he'd yelled at him? Was it this that made him look like he'd been stabbed over and over?

"Yes… I told him I never wanted or needed him, I called him such rude names, I told him to die." "You fucking _told _him!?" "I regretted it the second he ran out, but, I couldn't help him, the emotions won't show through… I can't even fake emotions."

Hidan frowned, glaring at the other as he clenched and unclenched his fist. He had to make a stand against him, and so far, he was the only immortal that would be able to be stabbed a couple of thousand times and still stand tall.

It was his turn to help.

"Fucker, do you know what you do when your lover gets sad?" Hidan spoke as he took a step forward, clenching his fists. "You hold them and hold them tight, don't fucking let them go, even if they claw at you and scream that you're a traitor."

He took another step forward. "When you tell them something that hurts them, you don't finish the job and make them cry, you explain it and fucking make them smile again because their smile is the biggest fucking treasure in the world!" He found himself towering above Sasori who was now looking up at the immortal. "And when you fucking become an emotionless bastard, pushing them away like in those fucking drama shows will lead to similar fucking reactions, most of the time self harm, suicide or something just as fucking extreme," Hidan explained before gripping Sasori's throat hard.

"Now you're going to fucking go to Deidara, explain this shit properly and hold him tight before you lose him! We're all walking a fucking fine line with our lives, and I wouldn't waste it with telling each other to die, because when we do, you're going to fucking regret it!" Hidan shouted loudly into Sasori's face, slamming the puppet into a wall.

"DO YOU FUCKING HEAR ME PUPPET BOY!?"

Hidan was panting hard, gripping Sasori's throat so hard that if the red head was still a human it surely would have snapped a while ago from the rough treatment that Hidan had been giving it.

After a moment of silence, Hidan growled and lifted Sasori by the neck, throwing him to the floor where the puppet landed on his hands and knees with a small grunt. "Fuck off, I don't want to see you until Deidara's smiling again," Hidan whispered slowly, biting the inside of his cheek and drawing blood, trembling hands clenched into fists. Sasori nodded, standing up. "Thank you." Hidan scoffed as he turned away, hearing footsteps. "Don't fucking say thank you now bitch, it's just common sense. Learn from it fucker," Hidan said. "Now get the fuck going before I fucking-"

He paused at the clatter of wood on wood and turned to see Sasori on the floor, heart container thrown halfway across the room. Perhaps this was the puppet's way of venting and spending some time alone to think.

Hidan stared at the scene silently before he left the room with the same lack of sound, shutting the door behind him. It wasn't his place to pick up the pieces, there was only one person for each of them that could heal such deeply inflicted wounds, and that person wasn't him. He found himself walking back to his own room but paused outside of Kakuzu's office. He twisted the door knob and opened the door slowly.

"Hidan, knocking is still customary. What do you want?"

Hidan glanced up at his lover and blinked, a pleading and gentle look on his face, tears brimming his eyes before he looked to the ground. Kakuzu was becoming frustrated, Hidan hadn't said a word since he'd entered, perhaps he was angry. He'd heard the immortal shouting. Hell, who _didn't _hear him?? Glancing up he saw Hidan staring at the ground, a tear rolling down his cheek and Kakuzu went venomous but instantly softened. He'd let his short temper snap at the one who'd upset Hidan.

Swiftly he stood up and moved over to the immortal, wrapping his strong arms around the other, pulling him close. "Oi, don't you dare get emotional on me now… What's wrong Hidan?" Kakuzu asked softly as he reached up, pulling his mask down and off, leaning down to kiss Hidan on the forehead softly.

"They're getting further away," he mumbled as Kakuzu's brow furrowed in confusion.

"Wha-" "Deidara tried to kill himself just now because Sasori shouted at him, he's a pure puppet and Deidara took that harshly… It just… It reminded me of…" Hidan's voice trailed off and he clung to Kakuzu as the stitched man sighed. "You don't need to get upset so easily you pansy." "I don't fucking get upset easily bitch, fuck off." "Ah, yes you do, you're much more emotional than you show others."

Kakuzu sighed at the moments silence before leading Hidan to his chair, sitting down before pulling the silver haired male to his lap.

"I hear you in your sleep, whispering your concerns and fears, don't think I don't know after all this time, after all these years," Kakuzu said as he gently brushed the tear away from the flustered males face, smiling at the embarrassed scowl Hidan wore, "We all did at one stage, you, Itachi, Deidara, myself, Kisame, Sasori, everyone talked in their sleep like that at first, some of us still do."

Kakuzu glanced down at the frustrated and questioning look Hidan was giving him

"Look, it's hard, but we're all strong, that's why we're here in Akatsuki. Things like emotional breakdowns are hard though because we don't express emotions like other, let's say, 'normal' people," Kakuzu spoke as he leant back, frowning and sighing. "Now what I think has happened is Sasori panicked and didn't know what to do and just went on the defensive and Deidara got hurt by it, he's still young and learning, not to mention all those hormones in his body are probably confusing him more. Happy one moment then frustrated and bored the next, it's horribly confusing," Kakuzu explained as Hidan snorted. "Yeah, says you who was a fucking teenager over two hundred and forty fucking years ago," He mumbled as Kakuzu chuckled, bringing Hidan's lips to his own in a soft kiss.

"There's my Hidan, cursing and trying to get me angry enough to pleasure you with pain," Kakuzu teased as Hidan smiled lightly, wiping his eyes. "Fuck off, as if I would. I just wanted to drop in. Is that so much of a fucking crime?" "No, no, of course not," Kakuzu spoke before blinking and pausing, raising his eyebrows as Hidan began absent mindedly playing with the stitching on his cheek.

"Out of curiosity, what did it remind you of?"

"Us."

Kakuzu nodded. He understood. It had taken the two such a long time to warm up, and when Hidan finally managed to summon the courage to confess his love- in his own way of course, screaming it halfway across a battlefield while slaughtering ANBU- Kakuzu had died. More correctly, one of his hearts was stabbed while he was in shock. Hidan, petrified that Kakuzu was dead, made a bloodied massacre of the group until they all lay dead. Kakuzu secretly lay still when he had recovered, listening to Hidan screaming his curses and pain to the corpses, begging that Jashin god of his to either bring Kakuzu back or kill him as well and keep him dead so they could be together.

When the stitched man got up the immortal went through a crazed fit where he started to hack his limbs off, stab himself, gouge out his eyes, anything in the form of self harm he could muster until Kakuzu explained the technique he had and had the immortal calmed enough to stop self-mutilating himself, but was still sobbing hard against him, tearing new scars into his tanned skin and screaming insults at him for frightening him so badly.

"It won't happen to them, they'll be happy together Hidan," Kakuzu said softly, gently rubbing the immortal's bare back. "Now come on, give me that stupid grin of yours," Kakuzu said as Hidan lifted his head. "Fuck you Heathen Bastard," Hidan said, grinning happily at the much older man.

Kakuzu smiled, tracing Hidan's lips and the grin he had now. "There, I've found my most valuable treasure again."

* * *

It had been a week exactly since the fight. Deidara rolled over, pulling the blankets up to his chin and shut his eyes tighter. "Dei-Dear? You're awake?" The blonde slowly opened his eyes and looked up at Konan and nodded as she smiled gently, feeling his forehead. Not too long after leaving Sasori in distress, he became sick and developed a fever. Konan, concerned for him, decided to make him stay in her room for a while, she didn't trust the blonde on his own.

Tobi was constantly at his side when he left the room and Konan found that Sasori hadn't left his room in a while, but decided to leave him be. Who knew what would happen if the puppet was still angry and working on a puppet, he'd most likely have a knife in his hands. Not the most encouraging thoughts there. She'd forbidden Deidara to go near sharp objects or clay and had him under constant watch and didn't let him near his room, not while he was sick anyway. When he was better then she would.

"I'm feeling better, un," Deidara said softly as Konan lifted her hand from his forehead. His cheeks were still a faint pink and eyes a little glazy, but otherwise he was almost fully recovered. Konan blinked, looking down at Deidara. "I… I was hoping that Danna would come see me, un…" Konan looked down and away. "He didn't come for me, un…"

Konan glanced up as Deidara sat up, blankets pooling around his waist. "I need to see him again, un." The bluenette nodded and stood and gently pat his shoulder. "Just be careful and if things go wrong-" "No. If I don't go back now, I don't think I can go back at all, un. I'm doing this, even if I lose an arm. Even if my eyes are cut out. Even if Danna doesn't want anything to do with me… Even if I lose him… I… I'm getting my closure, un," Deidara said softly, pushing the blankets off and turning, standing up.

The walk down the hall was longer than he remembered, and his footsteps were echoing. For seven days, Sasori's words had rung in his ears. For seven days, that beautiful red hair was all that the blonde could think of. Reaching his room, he paused, taking in a deep breath, swallowing hard and twisted the doorknob, opening it slowly.

The room was exactly how he had left it before. Well, almost. Glancing down he blinked at Sasori's body, lying still on the floor. He bent down, turning the puppet over onto his back, noticing a hole in his chest. Glancing around, Deidara was surprised at his calmness. But after all, he'd spent so many days straight of crying that staring down at Sasori seemed like it couldn't force any more tears out of him.

Deidara searched for the missing piece before spotting a container in the corner of the room. Scooping it up gently in his hands, he felt a tender smile pass his lips as he felt the gentle beating against his skin. He pressed his lips softly against the Kanji on the front, smiling more when he felt the beating speed up lightly as if in recognition on who he was.

Holding the heart close to him, the last piece of Sasori that was still human, he walked back to the puppet shell, kneeling beside him, lifting Sasori's head so that it rested in his lap before gently inserted the heart container into the waiting gap in the red head's chest, watching as it attached itself. Within seconds the blank holes where Sasori's eyes were closed and then opened, blinking a few times, the muddy brown mixed with staring up at Deidara's face.

"Dei-"

"Danna… Let me speak, un. Please," Deidara said softly as he stroked Sasori's cheeks gently. "I… I understand… It's okay if you hate me, but, please tell me now so I can leave you, un."

Sasori blinked, seeing tears slowly starting to run down Deidara's cheeks.

"_Smile… I told myself I'd smile when I told him this… Smile… Smile!" _

Reaching up slowly, Sasori blinked as he gently wiped the tears away. It felt more familiar, but was still foreign. "Deidara… I love you, I do. Trust me, believe me. This body… It's hard to get used to it and I need to make it remember what things feel like, or at least look like I have emotions," Sasori explained softly as he looked away from the blonde. "But my heart… It feels, it still feels. I could feel your hurt through there, it was faint, but, I could feel it, I'm so sorry I upset you. But you don't need a lover who can't feel your touches. A lover who won't properly respond to your kisses. Someone like me who is trying to tell himself that he loves you. You don't deserve someone like that, it won't be able to work out."

When his chakra detected tear drops landing on his cheeks he glanced up to see Deidara smiling gently. "It's okay… You can stop talking now, un… I love you, no matter what, even if you are a puppet, even if you can't feel my touches, it's okay… I-I'm not leaving you, un…" Deidara whispered, leaning down, resting his forehead against Sasori's. "I love you, un."

Sasori's eyes widened. _"Why? When there are so many in the world who could feel you… So many more that could please you physically, emotionally and make you smile so much better… And yet…" _Sasori watched Deidara silently, the blonde not moving, arms gently wrapped around the red heads chest and neck, forehead against forehead, eyes closed with tears silently running down his cheeks.

"_And yet he chose me…"_

Sasori gave a gentle smile, closing his eyes.

"_I'm the luckiest man in the world."_

* * *

**_Well, that's that. Not much to add to this without ruining the mood. Well, what did you think of this Chapter? Someone who's story I'm reading is reading I Choose My Life as well, and I'm very happy and thrilled, and they asked about a little more appearance of Hidan and Kakuzu. So I gave it, hopefully to the expectations. Oh gosh, I hope that they were still in character :S (They'd better be, you wanted to please them, right?) Aha! Of course! Check out their story too~! Take a look through my "Favourites" list, I'm still updating it because I learned the favourite feature a while ago, and I remember reading stories a long time ago but not favouriting them. Search through, you'll find a great mix of One-Shots to longer stories and quite a few great reads. (Are you done ranting?) Yes, that's it for now, drop a review and I hope that the next Chapter will be up nice and quickly as well :3 Thanks for reading~ *Waves* (Bye!)_**


	16. Chapter 16

**_I'm alive! (She's alive?!?! *Cries*) Times are tough when you're loaded with exams to study for... (*Depressed aura*) Physics seems to be gnawing on one of my arms, making it hard to type. (*Stress*) Well, it feels like I'm repeating myself, but I am really sorry that this chapter took almost forever. I wouldn't let down my beautiful readers and let studies stop me from coming online, I'm still writing, even if it is a paragraph a day. (A paragraph a day?) Over-exaggeration, but when I find spare time, all I seem to want to do is sleep. (Enough! They don't want to hear YOUR sob story! EXPLAIN THE STORY THEY'RE HERE FOR!) Well, I Choose My Life, Chapter 16 is FINALLY out. During this Chapter, you can guess the time frame where everything is linking to the Naruto Manga. Squint and you might be able to see Kishimoto's original plot. (That is before Fanfic Writer's like Twisted re-created the plot to their liking so male characters were hot for each other.) Alright, well, here is the much awaited I Choose My Life Chapter 16~!_**

* * *

**Chapter Sixteen**

Stretching, Deidara yawned gently, closing the door behind him. "Welcome back beetroot," Sasori teased gently with a soft smile. Deidara scoffed, sticking his tongue out. "So mean Danna, un," Deidara spoke as he pulled his hair tie out, letting his hair fall around his bare shoulders, sweat running down his lightly tanned torso which was very slightly sunburnt, his cheeks flushed red. "Have fun working out?" "Un, it's really hot out there." "It's really hot in here too now." "Thanks Danna, it's hot everywhere to me, I swear to Jashin the sun's getting closer to this place, un." "Remember what I said? Stop saying Jashin, Dei, and the sun isn't getting closer, you're getting taller."

Deidara pouted, stretching his arms across his body, his muscles flexing.

He'd hit a strong growth spurt over the past half a year, had grown quite a few inches and over-taken Sasori's height, gained muscle and weight and his jaw had straightened out lightly and gave him a slightly more manly appearance, even though he did have feminine qualities still such as his hair, hips and parts of his face, otherwise, he was resembling a man more and more by the month.

On top of that, Deidara's voice had broken half way through screaming at Hidan to avoid killing himself in the lounge room in front of the television while trying to 'prove' how to sacrifice people to satanic beings 'properly'. Hearing the higher pitched voice crack, break and drop an octave made Hidan laugh so hard he forgot why Deidara had been screaming at him before. Of course, Hidan now avoided horror movies with sacrifices as it gave him uncontrollable seizures of laughter.

Pulling the milk out of the fridge, Deidara opened the carton and tilted his head back, drinking the milk straight out of it. Sasori watched with mild amusement, sighing, face expressionless and bored. "Dei… Use a cup… Others drink from that milk too," Sasori said softly as Deidara shrugged and made a strange noise that could be turned into something of an 'I don't care' type of grunt. Sasori scoffed. _"Turning into a man indeed,"_he thought with a slight grin as Deidara dropped the milk back into the fridge, wiping his mouth as he turned to Sasori with a smile, putting his hair up into a full ponytail, trying to cool off the back of his neck.

"No new missions at all, un?" Deidara asked as Sasori shook his head, raising some papers he'd been reading before. "No, nothing is needed until Itachi and Kisame return from their mission," Sasori said softly. Deidara blinked and made a face before sighing and shrugging, moving and sitting down in Sasori's lap, glancing at the newspaper in the red head's hands.

"They've been gone an awful long time, un."

"They've been watching the Kyuubi, it takes almost a month to travel to Konoha and their mission _was_ to watch the boy for half a year at least."

"That's a bit unnecessary, un."

"No, it's to see if we can start capturing the other Bijuu, after all, ours is the little kid from Suna, if the Kyuubi is ready to be taken then the others will be easy pickings."

Deidara frowned and nodded. "Makes sense, un," Deidara said as he read the paper, pouting when Sasori turned the page. "Oi! I was reading the other page, un!" Deidara pouted as Sasori frowned, eyes widening. Deidara frowned. "Danna-" "Bottom left, page three," Sasori cut in.

Deidara turned his head back, brushing his fringe away to read, eyes wide in horror. "Oh fuck, un," he spoke as he jumped off Sasori's lap.

"_S-Rank Criminals invade Konoha. Uchiha Itachi and Hoshigaki Kisame enter through the gates with less than victorious results."_

Sasori threw the paper down, standing up and followed Deidara out of the kitchen, seeing him pulling a shirt on and grabbing his clay. "Hey! Deidara! What are you doing!?" Sasori shouted as Deidara turned, slipping his coat on. "That paper's a week or so old right, un? It takes a month of walking which would only be a day or so travelling by flying really fast, un, I'm going to go get them, un!" Deidara said as Sasori's eyes widened in shock. "You can't seriously do that! This paper's much older than a week; I found it, who knows where they are or which direction they're taking! ANBU might be after them!" Sasori said quickly as he took Deidara's arm gently, the blonde turning and giving him a determined frown.

"All the more reason to find them and help them, un," Deidara spoke, turning as Sasori grabbed his arm again and pulled him back, holding the blonde against him. Deidara blinked; face gently resting against Sasori's cheek and red hair, blinking as the red head rubbed his back softly. "Deidara. They're probably nearly here, be patient and stay here otherwise it will be pointless if they come back and there aren't many of us left in Akatsuki Base to help them," Sasori said softly.

Deidara made a face but held Sasori regardless. "I know, un… I'm just worried," Deidara said softly as he let go enough so that he could look Sasori in the eyes but still hold onto him gently. Sasori gave a small smile, kissing Deidara gently on the lips. "Don't express your worry through reckless behaviour, okay?" Sasori said gently as he brushed Deidara's fringe away, blinking when he saw the faint bloodied red colour in his hidden eye. He frowned gently.

"You're not wearing your contact?"

"Un, I had to take it out through training, sweat kept getting in my eye and it hurts when I can't wipe it away, so I've been taking them out before I go out, un," Deidara spoke, looking down, slightly unnerved that Sasori was staring at his eye so intently. "Hnn, I see," Sasori hummed as he gently touched underneath the bottom of the eye. "Can you see out of it?" "Not too well, un, but, it's fine. I usually hide it under my fringe so I don't have to see well out of it, un," Deidara said softly with a shrug, now fidgeting softly in one spot.

"You should move your fringe out of the way, there's no scar and you can't see any red colouring under the contact," Sasori said softly, choosing his words carefully. Deidara shrugged again. "Habit, un. I was self conscious about it for ages and this became a habit, even after the scars and ugly marks are gone, un. Feels too strange without it," Deidara mumbled before pausing as he smirked. "Except when we have sex, then it's fine to move it aside." "Watch what you're thinking Deidara," Sasori said with a smirk as he playfully hit Deidara on the head.

Deidara pouted before blinking. "I know I had a point to arguing, un, you made me go off topic." "The art of distraction." "Sounds like something I'd say, but no. I'm just gonna ride my bird out, go scout for them, if I see them in range I'll go down and pick them up, un," Deidara spoke as he let go and Sasori sighed.

"Alright, you're stubborn and there's no way to talk you out of this it seems," the red head mumbled as Deidara's face lit up and he kissed Sasori quickly. "Thank you Da-" "Hold on, don't get excited so fast, I didn't say what the conditions were."

Almost instantly Deidara's face fell and he sighed, pouting and crossed his arms over his chest. "Alright, what is it, un?" He asked with a slight frown. Sasori smirked. "You make it sound like it's some form of punishment or death threat." Deidara raised an eyebrow in question, unfolding his arms as he blinked.

"I'm coming with you."

* * *

"I think we should go back to base now Dei."

"Aw, but Danna, a little bit longer, un!"

"We've been in the sky for _a whole day_ circling the area."

"So? It's fine; you're a puppet so that shouldn't affect you, un."

"It doesn't, but you look like you are getting or have got heat stroke."

Deidara frowned, shaking his head and rubbed his visible eye, glancing around, using his scope to zoom in around the land. "Just a bit longer, un, please? I saw movement a while ago, un," Deidara said, squeezing his eye shut tightly, trying to concentrate on what he could see through the scope, scanning the barren earth below. It wasn't exactly desert type of barren land, but it wasn't luscious forest either. There were trees, and lots of them bunched together, but unlike how it was many years ago, the green grass had dried and turned brownish and was missing in some places where the earth had turned to clay-rock material and had started to crack.

Deidara sighed in exasperation; he could have sworn there was movement a while ago. "Dei, the heat's getting to your head, come on, let's land and go back to base," Sasori said gently, placing a hand softly on Deidara's shoulder who groaned in frustration at himself. "Fine, un," he mumbled, opening his eye and blinking as he turned the bird around, starting to descend slightly, making it fly in the direction of the base.

"There's no need to beat yourself up about it Dei," Sasori said gently after a silence, placing his hand on Deidara's shoulder in comfort. Deidara nodded, sighing as he continued staring out over the ground. "I know, un, I just feel worried is all, un," he said softly, blinking a few times at the sight of a blur of black, blue and hints of red and white. "Well, we're all worried, but there's not much we- DEI!?" Sasori shrieked out as the bird suddenly plummeted downwards, spiralling towards the earth faster. For a few seconds Sasori was petrified that Deidara had passed out and lost control of the bird, but when he felt the blonde sharply jerk his arm to the right, chakra flooding from his fingers and directing the bird downwards quickly, he was sure the blonde was doing this on purpose and hoped to god that Deidara knew what he was doing. The large bird swerved to the right, making Sasori grip the blonde's waist tightly, legs wrapped around him as well, anything to stay on and not fall off.

Feeling the gust of wind slow to a halt and Deidara crying out to someone, he dared open his eyes.

Kisame stared in blatant shock at the young blonde who wiggled his way out of Sasori's grip, jumping down to the ground and rushing over to Kisame and the black bundle in his arms that Deidara recognised as Itachi on closer inspection. "What happened, un? We heard you got found out at Konoha, un," Deidara babbled quickly as Sasori jumped down, rushing quickly to Kisame who was heavily panting. "Talk later… Please… Itachi…" Deidara blinked and glanced down at the tall and powerful male in Kisame's arms.

His face was drained of colour and blue tinted lips were parted and gasping for air, cheeks a heavy red from the fever he was running and blood trickling at a fast rate from his eyes. Deidara's eyes shot wide open in horror as he listened to Itachi's wheezing gasps.

"Please…" Kisame begged again, holding Itachi out gently. "Help him!"

That very second Deidara's face wiped emotions and became straight as he nodded, turning and jumping to his bird, climbing up and directing chakra to lower its lower back, tail feathers and wings. "Sasori-Danna, help him get on, un," Deidara instructed as Sasori nodding, rushing with Kisame to the back of the bird, carefully climbing on before turning, helping carry Itachi up as Deidara sat at the birds neck, starting to pump chakra into it, trying to make it easier to climb up and preparing it for flight.

Lowering himself on the birds back, Kisame looked around as Sasori gripped Deidara, settling behind the blonde. "Where do I hold on to?" Kisame asked as he glanced down at Itachi. "I can't hold onto both the bird and him." "Nothing to worry about Kisame-Danna, Just hold onto Itachi-Sama and it'll be fine, un," Deidara spoke, giving his fingers a little twitch.

Kisame watched as the birds tail twisted over backwards, closing around him in a small shell, but large enough for both him and Itachi to fit in.

Deidara grinned over his shoulder as he gripped the bird's neck tightly with his thighs. "We'll be in base in about ten minutes if I go at average speed, un-" "That's no good! We need to get there now!" Kisame interrupted. Deidara let out a maniacal grin and Sasori just gripped on tighter.

"Hold on tight then, un."

In almost a flash, the bird had jumped and was beating its wings heavily, speeding upwards before turning sharply. If Sasori had a stomach or sickness reflex anymore, he was sure he'd be turning green or promptly throwing up from the speed and velocity the bird was flying at.

He heard groans and soft mumbled words, which confirmed his thoughts that the weakest of the party was suffering from the high speeds. "Deidara, you should slow down a bit-" "Danna, if I slow down I'll find myself shaving a bit closer than I normally do with Samehada thanks to Kisame, un, and I want Itachi home fast to help him, un," Deidara spoke back, glancing over his shoulder briefly to flash Sasori a smile.

The red head frowned and nodded, clinging on tightly, resting his head against Deidara's back.

"Besides, un, I want to get you out of this position as fast as possible before I get a hard on from it, un!" Deidara teased, trying to lighten the mood as he dipped the bird downwards. Sasori chuckled, shaking his head and watched as the ground and base got closer. It was a close landing; it was something about the way the bird crashed, regaining its composure and stability as Deidara did some complicated hand signs, growling low in his throat in frustration that made Sasori feel anxious about it. The bird continued to skid forward, legs buckling and sending it forward by its stomach.

Deidara had to sharply pull his legs up, cramping them slightly as he twisted, grabbing Sasori and dove over into the small cave the bird's tail had formed for Itachi and Kisame. After a few moments, the bird skidded to a stop, dust clouds surrounding them. Sasori opened his eyes, limbs tangled with someone else's; whose they were he wasn't quite sure. He could hear panting in his ear but also someone's weight on his chest.

Small coughs came from his left and Kisame's voice broke through. "Itachi? Are you okay?" A small groan came in response near Sasori's ear and he realised that Deidara had tackled them both onto Kisame and Itachi.

Squinting his eyes from the strange mixture of darkness inside the little cave and the bright light outside he tried to focus on anything. The weight in his stomach and chest stirred and the soft strings of blonde hair were lifted as the blonde shuddered, coughing lightly. "Sorry, un… Everyone okay?" he asked softly, voice soft and slightly scratchy.

"I'm okay," Kisame spoke softly as Sasori simply kissed Deidara gently on the forehead. "I'm fine too." "How's Itachi, un?" "The impact startled him a bit I guess, he's out of it pretty bad," Kisame spoke as Deidara shut his eyes, rubbing the bridge of his nose warily. "I'm sorry, un, didn't mean to crash, doesn't happen a lot, un," he spoke as he carefully shifted off Sasori, crawling back into the light and wiping his forehead, glancing around.

"We didn't miss the base by much, just a few metres to walk, sorry I-" "What? Couldn't deliver us to the door? Honestly Deidara, we'd still be running if you hadn't found us, you're a great help," Kisame spoke with a wary smile, moving forward, gripping Itachi as he slid off the bird's wing, landing on the ground carefully.

Deidara's eyes widened in shock as he saw the back of Kisame's uniform completely shredded along with the shirt and most of his back. A little twist of sickness hit Deidara's stomach but he ignored it. "Kisame-Danna-" "I'm going inside to find Zetsu to help Itachi, just grab Samehada for me," Kisame spoke as he moved into the base quickly. Sasori turned, gripping the sword and pulled it up, carefully throwing it to the ground as he started to climb down off the bird, spotting Deidara's guilty, anxious, pale and sunburnt face. "Come on Dei, you did good," Sasori spoke as Deidara cringed, seeing some slices in Sasori's wooden arm. "Samehada-" "Is a sword. Flying with a weapon like that will get results like this. Were you hurt?" "No, un. I just cramped my legs and hips up, but better that then having my legs shattered." "Come here beetroot."

Deidara carefully slipped down, gripping the bird for support as he hugged Sasori, squeezing his eyes tightly shut.

Sasori gently stroked the blonde hair, kissing his neck softly, feeling small trembles from the blonde in his arms. Deidara's pride had clearly developed and he was restraining himself from crying. A man or not, most phobia's will stick around a lifetime, no matter how much you try to heal them. Sasori made soft shushing noises, trying to calm Deidara down as he finally heard the soft whimper and felt Deidara grip him tightly, face buried in the red head's neck.

"You did good Deidara… You did good. I'm really proud of you."

* * *

Deidara grit his teeth, slipping the final bandage on, securing it with a pin before testing to make sure it wasn't too tight, flexing his knee and frowning a bit. Sasori looked up and watched as the blonde stood, moving slowly to the medical cupboard and putting away the bandages.

"Is your knee alright?" "It's just a sprain Danna, un, I'm sure I'll live. I'm just putting this guard on so that I don't hurt it more, better to be safe than sorry, yeah?" Deidara spoke with a smile, slipping away the kit and shutting the door, moving to Sasori and sitting down on the lounge, snuggling up to the red head.

They stayed together, silent, the whole base in a sickening type of silence, only soft mutterings heard coming from Itachi and Kisame's shared room. Hidan wandered past the lounge but only gave a small nod to the two artists as he went to the kitchen, got a glass of water and then walked past. Kakuzu was most likely in his room with Hidan, counting money. Zetsu was inside with Kisame, looking over Itachi while Konan, Kisame and Pein stood by and watched. Not even Tobi was running around, even the hyper boy knew when it wasn't necessary to run around screaming happily.

Deidara had dozed off in Sasori's lap quite a while ago, breathing gently, and listening to the soft breathing made Sasori wish he could doze off as well, it looked so comfortable. Feeling a hand on his shoulders, he glanced up to see a tired looking Konan.

"We need your help on antidotes," she whispered softly, careful not to wake Deidara up. The red head nodded, gently shifting and carefully moved Deidara's head from his lap which caused him to stir and groggily open his eyes. Sasori gave a gentle smile, slipping out from beneath the blonde and letting a pillow replace where his lap had been. Slowly sitting up, Deidara leant back on his hands, tiredly rubbing his visible eye. "Mmm, Danna…? Where're you goin', un?" he asked tiredly, blinking up at him. Sasori just gently pat Deidara's head and kissed his lips softly, moving to Konan. "They need my help with an antidote, I'll try and be back soon," Sasori said softly as he blew a kiss back to the blonde before walking off with Konan.

Deidara nodded, looking down and then returning to resting on the couch. "I'll wait here for you, un." "Alright then," Sasori called back gently turning back to face the direction he was walking.

"Why do you need an antidote?" he asked softly, glancing briefly at Konan. "For Itachi's eyes, they're playing up a bit. We need a medicine or something and Zetsu can't make it on his own, some of the herbs he needs are poisonous when mixed together, but the poison is also neutralised by other herbs, we need you to tell us if it's safe to use or not," Konan explained softly as Sasori nodded, twisting the doorknob of the room. He was instantly hit with several different smelling herbs- quite literally-, dropping to his feet and a very disgruntled looking Zetsu who blinked and looked up at Sasori, half looking worried and embarrassed, the other half looking rather pissed off.

"Ah! Sasori! I'm sorry; I didn't think you'd open the door. **These fucking plants are pissing me the fuck off, not my fault you got hit by these sons of a bitch,**" Zetsu half whimpered half growled.

Bending over, Sasori scooped up the leaves in his hands, staring at them each in turn as Konan shut the door. After a few minutes Sasori glanced up. The room was dark and a few candles were lit to let them see, but not enough to create strong light. Perhaps the Uchiha was affected by it?

The red head glanced down quickly at Itachi.

Skin as white as paper, a light sheen of cold sweat covering his body, dried and drying blood down his cheeks and still trickling from beneath his eyelids, cheeks heavily flushed a feverish red and small raspy gasps of air coming from his pale lips, a look of pain on his face.

"Is he awake?" Sasori asked after a while, glancing up at Kisame.

The blue haired male shook his head. "He's been unconscious for a few hours now; his body became strained so he passed out. It happens all the time after… He…" The blue haired male trailed off, biting his lip. How he accomplished that without tearing his whole lip open was an amazing feat in itself that still amazed and bewildered Sasori to that day.

"After he what?" Sasori asked slowly.

Kisame groaned, sitting down, careful not to bend over too much, topless and wrapped in slightly bloodied bandages, not wanting to split wounds open again. "He used his Sharingan, that was how he got us into the village and how he got a woman to distract that Jiraiya bloke, then his little brother showed up when we found the Kyuubi and he had to fight him." Kisame scowled. "Little fucking angsty brat, Itachi was so out of it, didn't move and spoke less than usual and nearly used the fucking Mangekyo!"

Sasori frowned. "His little brother?" he questioned. Kisame sighed and nodded. "Look, his family's dead, all but his brother, Sauce-gay, Sas-uke, I don't fucking know, but the little brat needs a nice long hard shave," the shark man scowled. "Kisame, calm down, that's all I needed to know, if it's his Kekkei Genkai playing up, then we've got the right herbs," Sasori spoke as he moved and sat down beside Kisame before looking up at Zetsu.

"Zetsu, mix them up and turn half of it into a paste and half of it into drinkable medicine, come back when you're done."

"_**Yes, understood.**_"

* * *

That clock was ticking too slowly, that's what Kisame had decided. Lifting his head up, he warily checked the time. Almost one in the morning. Everyone had gone to sleep long ago with the instruction of 'Take care'.

With a sigh he reached over, taking his now cold coffee and gulping the last bit down, sighing. It wasn't waking him up anymore. He rested against the seat, closing his eyes and rubbed them warily with one hand before he heard a small choked sob. Opening his eyes in shock he looked up in time to see Itachi weakly reaching for him.

"Itachi?" Kisame breathed, moving forward and gently taking Itachi's trembling pale hand, staring worriedly at the others dark onyx eyes. "K-Kisame… I'm sorry," Itachi whispered softly, tears starting to run down his cheeks. Kisame started to panic. Itachi was apologising. Itachi was showing emotion. Itachi was crying.

This couldn't be good.

Shaking his head, Kisame brushed some of his blue hair out of his face, smiling gently down to Itachi. "Hey, it's fine, we got out of there, I was worried about you for a bit but you don't need to apologise, got me worried when you used Sharingan-" "It was my fault." Kisame froze. His fault? How was it Itachi's fault? "Look… It's not your fault… We never expected that Sasuke would come-" "Kisame…"

The blue haired male stopped talking, the pained look on Itachi's face at the mention of his sibling's name said enough.

"_Please stop…_"

Itachi took a shaky breath, closing his eyes, biting his bottom lip. "Kisame… I'm a double agent."

Kisame sat frozen, hand gently gripping Itachi's which was trembling and held a death grip on his own. "Double agent?" Kisame repeated slowly. Itachi opened his eyes, tears now freely flowing. "I was ordered by Hokage-Sama to annihilate my clan; they were plotting an attack on the village. When I did that, I had to run away and become a missing nin," Itachi took a deep shaky breath, glancing up at Kisame. "I was to spy on Akatsuki and give information to Konoha so they could kill everyone."

The words slapped Kisame hard across the face and he jerked his hand away from Itachi like he was burning.

"You were sent to kill us?"

"I can't do it though! I had to stop! I couldn't, so I lied to Konoha all the time, I tried to protect you all!" Itachi said desperately, eyes swirling to crimson. He held no control over his Kekkei Genkai when he was weakened.

"That's not the point! Was it you who has us in trouble so many times?"

"Kisame-"

"ANSWER ME!!"

Itachi winced, shutting his eyes. "Sometimes… I had to tell the truth, so they didn't know I was bluffing. But I'm on your side, Akatsuki's side!"

"What did you tell them?" Itachi became silenced and looked away. Kisame growled, desperate and upset. Why did it feel like someone was cutting his heart out? "WHAT DID YOU TELL THEM!?"

"Who came into Akatsuki, missions, where they were going, I told them everything at first, but then I feel in love with you, and I couldn't do it, I got too close to people, I- I couldn't kill you all by telling Konoha!" Itachi said desperately.

Kisame's eyes widened. "So the mission failures…"

"_I'm sorry I couldn't do it… I was diverted by some Missing Village Shinobi." "Hnn, I see Sasori. Perhaps we should train your partner faster then? Which Shinobi village?" "Konoha, Pein-Sama."_

"All of the ambushes…"

"_Get down! Kakuzu! Get the fuck down! The Konoha Nin are behind you! YOUR FUCKING HEARTS!" "I CAN'T SEE THEM! HIDAN! TAKE THEIR BLOOD ALREADY!"_

"All of our problems…"

"_We're out of supplies." "But Leader-Sama, un… I'm hungry… My tummy hurts, un." "Hush brat, don't be rude, we're all hungry." "We got our supplies cut off by a group of Shinobi; we'll be without food for a while unless you want to hunt." "Is there nothing we can do?" "Sit and wait and hope that we can survive the winter..." _

"All of the emotional strain we've suffered…"

"_Get up." "I-I can't, un… I feel sick; I want to leave Danna, un." "Deidara, please, it's just blood, just blood, it's not even fresh, it's dried, long dried." "I-I can't… I can't do it Danna, un!" "Deidara, the leaf Shinobi passed here ages ago, there aren't any more threats, they would have killed them off. Let's hurry. If there are any left we don't want to get caught by them." "Please… I can't... I feel sick, un…" "It's just down the hall, you made it this far, there are footsteps, Deidara, please, _please_, get up!" "I'm scared, oh god, I want to die, let me die, un! It hurts, it hurts!" _

"That was…"

"_Itachi, are you feeling okay? You were gone in the woods for quite a bit, I thought I heard mutterings." _

"It was all…"

"_Yeah… I'm fine Kisame."_

"You!"

* * *

**_Not much too say actually. It's slowly linking into the Naruto Manga, slowly and subtly, but this time from Akatsuki's point of view. If you've read/seen up to the latest Chapter/Episode, then you won't get any spoilers, not for the series at least, but you'll get quite a spoiler for this story. (Either way, it's a Lose-Lose situation! :D) The story is almost done~ There is one more Lemon in the next chapter, and that's the final one. (Aww, last one? Damn, you need to write some One-Shots Twisted.) I really hope I can get the next Chapter out faster, but my major exams are coming in two weeks exactly so I have to study super-hard. (Good luck honey~! T.T Come back alive~!) Well, what did you think of this chapter? Enjoyed it? Hated it? Loved it? Cried during it? Think you should ship me about a million kilograms of coffee so I can stay awake when typing this? Drop me a review and let me know, they're always loved and when I go back and read them they make me smile and warm me up. (Aww, fuzzy speech. Have some Cheese.) Anyway, thank you so much for being so patient, thanks for reading, thanks to all my reviewers, the readers, subscribers, I love you all and hope to see you next Chapter! (Bye-Bee~)_**


	17. Chapter 17

**_Hello everyone~ I'm back with Chapter Seventeen~ (Few~ That took forever Twisted!) Exams were tough, but I made it through, I passed all of my subjects nicely and got my report card back (Is this why you're so depressed??) When school comes around a certain teacher is being hassled to explain why she gave me the mark she did. (You passed though right? Why complain??) You know what, that might explain why this Chapter is a) Poorly written, b) Overly Angsty or c) Makes you wonder why the fuck you're reading it. Apologies in advance. Of course, as promised, there's a Lemon, but not as good as the others, this one is a bit more- (If you say angsty I swear to god I'm going to dye your hair funny colours and call you an Emu). Anyway, this Chapter is a bit sadder, you can see where it's heading. No cheeriness from now on, sorry, it's not getting any happier. If you want something happy, try reading The Happy Little Elf :3 (No Series of Unfortunate Events references Twisted :\ ) Anyway, Lemon warning blah blah tissues needed blah, apologies it took forever (A fucking month! Write faster bitch! Don't make me chain you down in the cellar again to write until your fingers bleed!! *Rage* ) Hopefully the next chapter will come out faster as I'm still on holidays for a bit longer. Anyway, enough chatter, you poor dear's have waited long enough, here you go, I Choose My Life Chapter Seventeen~ (Enjoy! :D )_**

* * *

_**Chapter Seventeen**_

Betrayal. Such a painful word. It was hard to come to the truth when it was revealed. The very thought that it had been Itachi who had slowly been trying to get them killed and had almost succeeded quite a number of times was sheer torture. The days were slow and felt agonisingly draining. Kisame found himself not sleeping and just sitting in the corner of the room, beds now once again separated, staring at Itachi's body which was tied and forcefully immobilised by numerous methods.

Days became weeks which melted into months. Itachi had long recovered from his trip to Konoha physically, but was hurting in ways that no ointment could touch, where no stitching could be done and where it could bleed him dry if left alone. Pein had constantly come in to interrogate him and it always ended in the orange haired man slumping beside him, hands in his face, whispering.

"_Why? Why would you do this?"_

The news came as a strong shock to everyone and Deidara and Hidan were beside Kisame as much as possible, comforting the strong shark-like man.

"_It's okay, un, none of us could have seen this coming…"_

"_Hey man, don't fuckin' beat yourself up about it, he'll be trusted again soon by Pein, none of us were seriously fucking hurt… We're all still fucking alive…"_

Itachi was released from captivity of his own room after half a year, but remained constantly watched by Akatsuki. When Itachi went to speak with Kisame the blue haired male would listen and say he had forgiven the Uchiha, but his face showed all of the pain still. When Kisame finally got to hold Itachi months later, he broke down and clung to the pale man tightly, begging his soul's wishes to his lover.

"_Don't leave me, never betray me, don't die, I'll forgive you if you never hurt us again. I know you never meant for this to happen."_

Before any of them had realised it, spring had come and gone and was now once again in full bloom, birds slowly starting to twitter to each other. Deidara sat on the open window ledge, staring at the small blue bird that sat on his finger, happily singing to him. He watched it gently, his eyes tracing sapphire blue feathers and then the golden curved beak. He'd never bothered remembering the names or species of birds; he was fond of all of them.

"Hnn, you seem more spaced out than usual Deidara."

The blonde looked up, startled, the bird twittering and fluttering off, making Deidara turn his head back out of the window to watch it fly off, frowning, one leg up on the windowsill close to his chest. Sasori smiled gently at the blonde and walked forward, hugging him and looking out at their bedroom scenery. It wasn't much, just the training grounds which had turned to rock and dust long ago.

The two remained silent and Sasori smiled, kissing Deidara's jaw where it met his neck. "I think puberty is hitting you now, it's making you moody," Sasori teased. Deidara smiled and turned his head to look at the other. "Puberty finished ages ago, un. I'm a man now," Deidara spoke, voice deep. Sasori took a few steps back, eying the other and smirked.

Toned stomach, skin tanned a nice healthy colour, jaw straightened out more, he'd gained more muscles, weight and height as well, yes, Deidara, age 19 had grown quite a bit.

"Still can't believe it's been 14 years," Sasori spoke as Deidara raised an eyebrow at the red head. "Trip down memory lane Danna, un?" the blonde questioned as Sasori smirked. "Hnn… Doesn't feel like long ago that you were just a tiny little toddler running around clinging to my pants," Sasori spoke. Deidara chuckled. "No, now I'm just an adult pulling you down onto the bed clinging to your pants, un, is there a difference you old perve?" Deidara spoke as Sasori chuckled. "Come on, lunch is ready," Sasori interrupted the other before he could speak again.

Rolling his eyes, the blonde hopped down to the floor, walking over to Sasori, the red head now reaching the blonde's shoulder- chin at best.

Sasori looked up and smiled, reaching up and gently stroking Deidara's face. "You've got that look in your eyes," Sasori mused, watching the sapphire blue eye. Deidara blinked, turning to face Sasori, arm draped around the other's shoulders now. "What do you mean Danna?" Sasori smiled, gently running his fingers across Deidara's cheek and jaw, pausing to trace his lips softly. "That wondering look, the same when you found something curious and it's got your mind. Your body might have changed but your habits haven't," Sasori explained to Deidara's questioning look. The puppet chuckled. "What's on your mind?"

Deidara smiled at the other, quickly kissing his lips and hugging him. "Danna," Deidara breathed softly in Sasori's ear, "I was thinking… Why are we still here? I mean in Akatsuki, un. Do we have to live here forever?" Sasori blinked slowly, looking ahead of him, stroking Deidara's blonde hair absent mindedly, as was his habit now. "Well, of course, we live a comfortable life in Akatsuki don't we? We have a roof over our heads when we're here, and quite a lot of food, quite a bit more than some countries do," Sasori spoke softly, looking down at his fingers to watch the blonde strings slip through his wooden fingers.

What was Deidara getting at?

"Well… I've just been thinking, because all I really remember about coming here was Konan-Nee-Chan and Pein-Sama… My father had gone on a bit crazier than usual, beaten me, raped me, and almost carved my eye out, un..." Sasori blinked. _"That's how it happened." _"But I remember lying there in my blood, it was everywhere, I couldn't really do anything. I was dying, un, I was sure. And when Konan-Nee-Chan came, I was so grateful for a caring woman's touch I didn't care what her and Pein-Sama did to me or where they took me, un."

Deidara took a deep breath, pulling Sasori closer to him. "I've always been so grateful, I've never thought about why I'm here, un… And when I overheard Pein-Sama a quite a while ago talking, I realised that we're here by force, but they're trying to make us as comfortable as possible so leaving isn't on our minds, un." "Deidara…?" "What I'm trying to say is, well, are you here by choice, un?"

Sasori blinked. By choice? He lifted his head slightly to look into Deidara's eyes, a serious look on the blonde's young handsome face. "Of course, I came to Akatsuki on my own accord, I agreed to join," he said softly. "So you just went up to a criminal organisation with the power to destroy countries and asked to join and they had no problem with that? Welcomed you with open arms, un?" Deidara asked.

Sasori frowned. "We're not criminals Deidara," he said slowly. "Then what are we? We kill people to get what we want; our leader doesn't tell us anything besides this thing about tailed beasts with ultimate power that could control countries, un. It sounds like we're criminals, un," Deidara said as he looked at the ground.

"When I was about ten I think, I went to the shops to get food with you. You said I could go to some candy stores or art stores, so long as I came back to the shop you were in half an hour later, un. I went to the same candy store I usually do, and the receptionist, she was crying to this man. I heard Hidan's name come up, and Akatsuki, un." A bitter sad smile passed Deidara's lips and he laughed gently. "Back then I just thought it was the name of the family, of our family, where we live. The Akatsuki's. I went around calling myself Deidara Akatsuki for so long, un. But when I told her that Akatsuki wasn't bad, she slapped me and screamed all this abuse."

Deidara gently pulled away from Sasori. "I found out about the things everyone did, how they were wanted as criminals everywhere, and that I was now an S Rank criminal just by living with you. If I hadn't ran out, she would have killed me when I said that Hidan wasn't bad and didn't mean to curse all the time and that he's sorry for whatever he did. I began to think, if we're all here by choice, why can't we leave without telling Konan-Nee-Chan and Pein-Sama? Maybe they are just worried for us, un." Deidara laughed again, snarling slightly. "When I went to ask Pein-Sama why, Konan-Nee-Chan froze, she got this scared look on her face. Pein-Sama got mad though, told me if I ever thought of running away, he'd kill me. I couldn't leave. I can't. Ever, un."

Sasori frowned. "It… It's not like that at all Deidara, they let us leave, so long as-" "So long as we come back with something for them to prove our loyalty and tell them where we're going in the first place, un." "That's not what I meant at all Dei." "Then let's leave." "What??"

Sasori stared dumbfounded at Deidara. "Leave… Leave Akatsuki? Why?" Sasori whispered; the walls had ears. "Deidara, I thought you were happy here, I'm happy here, we're happy here, we're all happy," Sasori said softly, slowly, heart starting to race in its container, ears perked and listening for any form of noise, wishing that perhaps they weren't Shinobi and didn't have the footsteps of mice.

Deidara frowned. "Happy, un? To be on constant alert wherever we go, to have to change our appearance to walk into a village, to have to act like different people, un? Why can't I just walk into a village as me? As Deidara?" he asked softly. Sasori sighed. "Dei, they'd-" "Kill me, un. Because without realising it, I've become a criminal too, you raised me to be able to kill people, un," Deidara said softly, trying to restrain anger. "Deidara, you have to understand that you've been doing this willingly-" "And you think a five year old knows what's wrong? Do you think a five year old knows how to tell the only people who have ever cared for him that he wants to leave them, un?"

Deidara stood, lips starting to tremble, a desperate look in his eyes as he reached out, gripping Sasori's arms. "Let's go, un…" _"Please, I'm scared Danna…" _"Let's leave Akatsuki, un…" _"We can start a life together, in a nice little cottage in a village by the sea somewhere…" _"Deidara, I don't understand, where's this coming from?" _"Danna, it's going to get scary, I want to leave while we're still alive, un!" _"Deidara?"

"Sasori, Deidara, I have a mission for you two."

Deidara and Sasori's heads snapped up to the door to see Pein standing, a serious look on his face. Deidara's hands trembled lightly but he stood up straight, letting go of Sasori and nodded. "Yes Leader-Sama, un," he spoke in a confident voice. Sasori looked up at Deidara, frowning lightly, concern on his face. "Sasori?" The red head blinked, glancing up at Pein and his mouth set in a firm line. "Yes Leader-Sama."

As they followed Pein back to his office, Sasori couldn't help but think why of all times did Deidara pick now to want to run away? Why was he considering this at all? Surely they were happy? Of course the organisation had low points, being wanted criminals, being Shinobi, but every village would be like that. If they were cleaned of being criminals, they would still be Shinobi, with the exact same dangers as right now. People would still be out to kill them; they'd have just as much chance of coming home to a 'peaceful' village as they did coming home to Akatsuki.

"We've finished observations, and I believe it's time to start movements," Pein spoke, sitting behind his desk and pulling out a scroll. His Rinnegan eyes flicked up to the blonde and red head.

"It's time you two went out to capture the one tailed beast."

Deidara had to force his facial expression not to change; he kept a serious face and nodded along with Sasori. But he didn't want to nod. He wanted to scream and cry and throw chairs and explode things, to deny with all his might! He didn't want this mission; he wanted to plead to pass it on to someone else.

The one tailed beast… Hadn't the nine tails sent Itachi home barely able to move after just encountering him? Itachi had had to use Sharingan multiple times just to get in and out alive. Wouldn't that mean this one tailed beast was the same? It would cause him and Sasori pain too wouldn't it?

Sabaku no Gaara…

"Dismissed, leave for the mission early tomorrow morning; I want you two there by dusk."

"Yes Pein-Sama, understood," Sasori said, accepting the scroll.

"Understood, un," Deidara whispered, eyes to the ground.

* * *

"Have you finished packing?"

"…"

"Deidara?"

"…"

"Do you hear me Dei?"

Sasori frowned and sighed, zipping up his bag and walking over to the bed where Deidara sat, slouched over and staring at the ground. He kneeled in front of him, gently stroking his face. "What are you moping about Dei?" Sasori asked gently, smiling softly as Deidara looked up at him. "Sasori no Danna… Let's have sex, un." Sasori blinked, eyes widening marginally. "Now? Why-" "Please Danna, I'm scared about this mission and I want to feel you inside of me, un," Deidara said softly, pulling Sasori forward onto the bed.

"Deidara, what's so different about this mission compared to others?" Sasori asked softly before Deidara gently kissed him, tongue trailing the red head's lip, mouth parted, begging for Sasori's tongue to play with his own. The red head granted this wish and their tongues tangled, rubbing up against each other in Deidara's mouth, no fight for dominance, no power battle, just deep passionate kissing.

"We're capturing a tailed beast, it's dangerous, I'm worried-" "We won't come back?" "Unn."

Sasori glanced down at Deidara, lying on the bed beneath him, shirt already discarded, hair undone and lying like a golden halo around him. He leaned down, gently nipping at his neck, kissing and sucking, creating hickeys as Deidara moaned gently, arching his neck and tilting his head away to give Sasori better access.

"You shouldn't be scared. We'll come back home."

Sasori trailed his lips slowly lower, gently nipping one of Deidara's nipples before running his tongue around it and then sucking, making the male squirm and moan as the other was pinched and fondled.

"I just want you in me… Ahh… One more time, un… Just… Unnn… Just in case."

"I understand."

Deidara reached up, taking Sasori's shirt off and dropping it to the ground. The red head merely continued his slow and torturous movement down Deidara's lithe body, kissing and nipping along the tan muscled skin. His fingers gently pulled down Deidara's pants, the blonde lifting his hips up slightly to help him, keeping them up as his boxers were pushed to his ankles before kicking both articles of clothing off, leaving him naked to Sasori.

The red head took off his pants and boxers, dropping them in the pile of clothes and hovered above Deidara, kissing him passionately.

It was slow. It was gentle. It was loving.

Sasori understood what Deidara had said, and he wanted this to show all of his love.

Deidara gently sucked on Sasori's fingers, moaning around them as the red head pumped his cock softly. Releasing the fingers from his mouth, Sasori's mouth replaced them again, kissing him heatedly as Deidara's hand rested over his heart container, licking and kissing gently and causing moans of his own to flow into Deidara's mouth and mingle with the blonde's.

A finger was gently pushed in, moving in and out slowly before a second was added. Deidara broke the kiss for air, groaning in slight pain as a third was added, scissoring and thrusting in and out of him slowly. "Ahh, Danna, yes, unnn," Deidara breathed out softly, back arching, eyes fluttering shut in ecstasy as Sasori continued to hit the blonde's prostate as he stretched him.

Deidara restrained a whimper as the fingers were removed and gasped loudly, groaning in slight pain as Sasori thrust in completely.

Opening his eyes, Deidara brushed hair from his face, looking up into Sasori's muddy brown eyes. "I love you Deidara," Sasori whispered to him softly, pulling out almost all the way and thrusting back in gently.

"A-Ah~ Ahh yes Danna, I- Ahh, I love you…" Deidara moaned back softly, moving his body along with Sasori, meeting his thrusts.

He had to restrain tears from forming, this felt great, it always felt fantastic having sex with Sasori, puppet or not, but something in his chest hurt, it was tightening and making him hurt. He couldn't put his finger on it, but that mission was bad. Made him anxious and uncomfortable and he couldn't stop thinking about it!

"There, un!" Deidara cried out, wrapping his legs around Sasori's waist, his sweaty body sliding against Sasori's perfectly as the thrusts sped up a little, going deeper and deeper inside of him, angling into that pleasurable spot that made Deidara see stars, arch his back and press up against Sasori's chest and moan.

"I l-love you… So much Sasori… I always will Master…" Deidara breathed, moaning loudly as Sasori took a hold of Deidara's cock, pumping it in time with his thrusts. Deidara tossed his head back, moaning loudly, cheeks painted red. Sasori kissed and nipped the skin on Deidara's neck that he had just exposed, creating more love marks and more breathy moans. He could feel that Deidara was close and with a final hard thrust into Deidara's prostate the blonde came, crying out Sasori's name and spilling his seed over their stomachs and chests.

Sasori watched Deidara, gently brushing stray golden strands from his face and kissed him full on the lips.

"Deidara, I love you."

"I love you Sasori, un."

A tear gently rolled down Deidara's cheek, holding his lover tight.

"I love you."

* * *

**_*Offers tissues to readers* It's just a start of the angst fest. Like I said, not a great Lemon, I wish I could have given you a better one, but, yeah, depressing Lemon instead. (How does it work? Being depressing Lemon without being Rape?? You're fucked in the head Twisted :\ ) Well, I think most of you know where this is heading, if you've read the Manga, yeah, Spoiler alert for story. (And if you haven't read the Manga, spoiler alert for the Manga! ;p ) If you have and others haven't, please don't spoil it for them (That's our job to drop bombshells and make them cry!!! Bwahahaha!!! *Sinister grin*) Not much to add, thank you all so much for being patient and waiting for this, love you all, I'm very grateful for you! :33 (Love hearts! :D ) If you did like this, drop in a Review, help me fix up my writing, give me some advice and tell me what you think, I do appreciate it :3 Until next time~ See ya~ (Bye bee~! :D )_**


	18. Chapter 18

_**Tissues out. Right now. Most of you saw this coming, so I won't say much. God I've been miserable lately, maybe that's why this was so easy to write? (You're sad? :( ) No, just moody, and school? Bleh. Having a cold doesn't help. I'm also trying to push out this horrible angst and sadness into I Choose My Life, but also a little one shot of sadness that is called "Yellow and Red" which I will post up hopefully soon, once it's done. (Once you stop being lazy you mean?) Seems right now is super angst mode. Especially with the whole Swine Flu "Pandemic". I hope all of the people out there are okay, doing well and stay safe, alright? Anyway, now isn't a time to wollow in real pity, but to sob in make-believe situations. (*Gets tissues ready*) I think I started crying writing this, especially, well, you'll see. Even though it's sad, enjoy I Choose My Life Chapter 18~**_

* * *

_**Chapter Eighteen**_

"So…" Deidara began slowly, taking step after step on scorching hot sand, "The ones Orochimaru manipulated are ahead, un?" Taking a deep breath, Deidara continued. "It seems for some reason, he leaked out information and turned into a traitor, un." "We don't have a choice, it seems. I don't know what he's like after using that Jutsu either," Sasori spoke through Hiruko's voice, frowning as he slid across the sand slowly. He was wishing he made movement in Hiruko slightly easier across the Suna sands.

He kept staring ahead, but addressed Deidara. "Is it alright just with that bag? Our opponent uses the 'Power of human sacrifice'." "My Jutsu's are all artistic… So I came up with my favourite, number 18, un. Because our opponent _is_ the 'One Tail', un."

Deidara let out a confident smirk, watching as a sand Jounin jumped down, slowly starting to slaughter his comrades. "This is your doing Danna, un?" Deidara asked softly as Sasori grunted. "Of course, the man didn't just decide to spontaneously kill off everyone," Sasori spoke, walking forward as he watched the men stop moving, one standing tall. Deidara rolled his eyes, following Sasori forward, face straight and shadowed under the hat. He was grateful for the hats, by now he would have been sunburnt otherwise, even in the dusk of the Suna sun. As they reached inside the chasm, the male froze.

"Well done… You remembered me?" Sasori spoke. "Yes sir! Of course, Sasori-Sama!" Deidara's eyes narrowed and he resisted the urge to scoff at the man. _"'Sasori-Sama', what a suck up,"_ Deidara thought. Then again, grovelling to a person with as much power as Sasori was a wise idea. On the same train of thought though, grovelling to a person with as much power as Sasori who had a partner and lover such as Deidara was _not _a wise idea.

"Alright. If you'd forgotten, I might have had to use my Jutsu, un," Deidara grumbled, a bit disappointed he couldn't blow this guy up. "Since your memories have returned, you are my faithful servant," Sasori continued, ignoring Deidara. With a sigh, Deidara nodded, holding his hand out which was chewing on some clay. "Alright then, here we go."

Throwing out a small bird, Deidara couldn't help but feel a tinge of jealousy to the sand Jounin who had known his Master longer than him it seemed. "Sasori, your husband should watch too, un," Deidara spoke, causing Sasori to frown. "We will attack the village from above, un," Deidara spoke, making the bird expand with a hand seal, jumping up onto it and slipping his hat off, turning and grinning at Sasori.

"How is it? This artistic modelling, un?"

"Delightful," Sasori replied sarcastically, watching Deidara take off into the skies.

* * *

"How long have you been bleeding?" "Since I captured the bastard, un." "Does it hurt?" "Like a bitch, un, but I'm sure I can manage."

Sasori glanced over at Deidara who had now seated himself comfortably on the Jinchuuriki's corpse, his good hand cradling his left arm, a look of slight pain on his face. "Are you sure? Would you like anything for it? A crushed arm isn't anything to be taken lightly," Sasori spoke, frowning as Deidara held out his right hand. "Anaesthetic please, un, I need to forget about the pain in my arm when I fight, un. According to Itachi and Kisame there's two groups, un, and they're bound to come itching for a fight," Deidara spoke. Sasori opened Hiruko's hatch, slipping out from under the dark cloak and moved to Deidara, kneeling down beside him, looking at the torn up sleeve and bloodied arm.

"I'm surprised you didn't cry."

"I don't cry Danna, un."

"Hn, of course not."

Pulling out a syringe, Sasori injected a blue liquid into it before undoing Deidara's coat and pushing it off the side slightly, revealing Deidara's shoulder. "He smashed you up quite a bit y'know brat." "Quit rubbing it in, un." Sasori smiled gently and pressed the needle into Deidara's flesh, hearing a soft gasp before a moan of relief. "That's so much better already, un," Deidara breathed softly, his eyes fluttering shut as he tugged the coat back on awkwardly, allowing Sasori to zip it back up. Blue eyes opened slowly as he heard voices and he smiled sadly. Sasori's muddy brown eyes connected with his partners and he leaned up slowly, and without exchanging words they kissed on the lips softly. Just a gentle soft kiss.

"_I love you."_

They didn't need to say it.

Sasori quickly moved back to Hiruko, wrapping himself up in the dark blanket- to help mask his chakra- and slunk into the open and awaiting puppet as it closed, the cloak sliding itself on to fit properly.

There came a loud crashing sound and rocks flew in every direction, crumbling. Deidara mentally cringed; what an entrance these Konoha Shinobi had to make, destroying one of their hide outs so violently. But defeating them couldn't be too difficult though, there had to be four less if the Akatsuki's trap worked.

Figures darted into the cave quickly; a silver haired male, pink haired girl, blonde haired boy, and a grey haired old woman.

Deidara couldn't help but smirk, eying the group eagerly.

"Well then… Which one of you is the 'Jinchuuriki' I wonder, un…?"

* * *

Short gasping breaths came from the blonde. He shuddered, knees buckling beneath him and sending him crashing into a tree where he leaned against heavily, coughing up blood, sweat trickling down his cheeks and neck. Not only was his clothing torn and soaked in sweat, but his own blood too. Shuddering, Deidara threw up, forcing tears back. The pain was unbearable, the anaesthetic had worn off quite a long time ago and the pain of his crushed arm was throbbing heavily, but the real pain was flowing blood at a heavy and fast rate from his right arm.

He straightened up, panting, sick running down his chin as he chanced a look down at his arm, his eyes widening in horror. It wasn't there, it was gone, it hadn't been a Genjutsu, he really did have his arm torn clean off. He vomited again, feeling nauseous and dizzy; the blood loss was getting to him. Forcing himself to stand he started walking again, he had to find his arm and then meet Sasori, surely the hag and little girl were dead by now? Of course they were lying, he'd just gotten sick and dizzy and his mind had made up those words. Defeated Sasori. Ha. As if. Of course that couldn't have happened. Not some little girl who hadn't gone through puberty and some old hag who had death gripping her shoulder. No. Sasori was still alive. He knew it.

He wiped his mouth and chin against the bloodied torn cloak on his shoulder, staggering forward, his breaths now gasps. _"I've got to be stronger than this, what would Danna say?"_ he thought as he trudged forward, blonde hair swaying softly about him. _"I've got to be strong, Danna would laugh at me for giving up so easily and getting caught, it's my own fault my arm was amputated."_ At that he had to resist the urge to vomit again.

He could smell it.

Oh god, the blood was everywhere.

He could feel it dribbling across him, soaking his clothing; he reeked of blood.

Deidara glanced down at himself warily, studying himself. _"I got beat pretty badly; this isn't something for showing off… I haven't been bloodied up this bad in years,"_ he thought, _"No, this has to be the worst. Kakuzu will be pissed at me, he'll need to fix up my limbs, and Zetsu will need to heal me…"_ Glancing up at the sound of voices in the distance, he let a saddened and pathetic look cross his face. _"Danna won't be impressed either, he'll start babying me again."_ He let a bitter smile cross his lips. _"Actually, I wouldn't mind Sasori no Danna caring for me like that, bathing me, feeding me, I haven't been tucked into bed in ages,"_ he thought with a silly and wary smile. Yes. When he got back he'd ask Sasori to baby him for a while, humour him.

Looking around, he tried to spot the direction of the voices. He paused and blinked, sweat obscuring his vision.

"Sasori no… Danna?" he breathed softly. The vision of the red head seemed to almost smile at him. So pure. Gentle red hair floating in the non-existent breeze, pale skin glowing faintly, muddy eyes looking less dazed and glittering to him, hell, he even looked taller. Ah. Had he himself shrunk? Perhaps he was reverting back to a child like mind state of mind; he remembered Sasori used to be nice and tall compared to him. Frowning lightly, he tilted his head, moving towards the figment of his imagination that had now stretched out its arms towards him. Sasori didn't have puppet joints, it was smooth skin. Was this how Sasori had once looked? He couldn't remember. "Ne… Danna… I won, but, I got beat up pretty badly, un," Deidara spoke softly, smiling slightly. The red head chuckled, gesturing for the blonde to move closer.

Mindlessly he followed, moving closer to Sasori, tears prickling his eyes without reason. _"You've been beaten pretty badly, brat,"_ Sasori teased with a smile as Deidara reached him. Deidara smiled more, restraining the tears as much as possible. He nodded. "Y-yeah, I suck, don't I? You'll still love me though, even though I'm going to have ugly scars for a long time, right, un?" Deidara whispered, pausing in front of Sasori.

He wanted to hug the red head, but his arms weren't capable of that movement.

Sasori seemed to understand and wrapped an arm around him, pulling him close. God, he was so warm. Deidara closed his eyes as fingers ghosted over his cheek, brushing stray tears away that still fell to the ground softly. The pain was now clutching his throat, lumping and making it harder to force tears back. Sasori had a way with him that would always bring out his raw self.

"_I will always love you Deidara…"_

The blonde smiled, the voices near him becoming louder.

"_Always."_

"For all eternity, un?"

"_Of course… For all eternity."_

Deidara smiled, forcing tears to stop as he opened his eyes, the vision fading before him. He smiled, letting the fading image kiss him tenderly on the lips.

"I love you Danna, un."

"The cause of death was definitely from a bomb explosion Zetsu-San…"

"I love you, un," Deidara whispered, watching the image leave him. He blinked the tears away, face becoming expressionless as he stared at the spot, panting, his pain slightly alleviated. The image of Sasori was gone. He turned, blinking as he glanced through the bushes to see Zetsu standing beside Tobi, the orange masked boy holding his- aha, arm. There it was.

"I wonder if bits of him fell down around here…"

"Get your hands off that, idiot, un!"

Tobi glanced up, eye widening. "Ah! You're alive!" he cried out, jumping up happily. He had almost begun crying thinking they'd lost two members at once.

"What happened with the Jinchuuriki?" Zetsu asked, eying the blood dripping from the blonde's elbow. Deidara huffed, narrowing his eyes at Zetsu. "Hey, my part in this is over, un," he grumbled, looking less than pleased. He didn't want to go back and fight them in his current condition, not while he was hallucinating and bleeding everywhere. He wanted his arms re-attached and to go back and be pampered by Sasori thank you very much.

Tobi laughed, standing up as he held Deidara's limp arm, inspecting where it was blown off. "You just barely made it, eh Deidara-San. You're okay… Aren't you?" Tobi asked with a grin. Deidara's eyes narrowed and he glared at Tobi. He was being humiliated by someone who acted more childish than him as a seven year old! "Tobi… I only let things go three times… Next time you say something stupid, I'll set you a cause of death, un," Deidara threatened, moving forward slowly, staggering now. Tobi scratched about where his chin would be on his mask and made a "Hnn" sound. "Most likely death by explosion," Tobi mused.

Deidara's eye twitched and gained a dark frustrated look. Zetsu sighed, closing his eyes. "That's… Three times," he mumbled. Swiftly twisting his body, Deidara kicked Tobi's legs out from under him, knocking him to the ground with a heavy _thump_, followed by Deidara dropping down by Tobi's head. "Death by asphyxiation, un!" Deidara growled, wrapping his legs around Tobi's neck and squeezing. "Gah! SENPAI~!" Tobi squealed loudly, grabbing at Deidara's legs and tugging, trying to make him let go.

Deidara let out a playful smirk as Tobi squealed and whined before he heard a soft sigh from Zetsu. "Deidara, don't kill Tobi, **I think you've got more shit to think about then Tobi pissing you off**," Zetsu spoke, both tones of voices saddened.

Deidara blinked, legs loosening slightly from around Tobi's neck. He looked up at Zetsu, sitting up slightly, legs still wrapped around Tobi's neck.

"What… Do you mean, un?" he asked softly.

Tobi had stopped struggling but still made pathetic whimpering noises.

Was he crying?

"Ne, Zetsu-San, what do you mean, un?" Deidara asked, more desperately this time. "Tell me!"

Zetsu looked away, head down as he kept silent. Deidara's expression became desperate and fearful, eyes widening drastically as he turned to glance down at Tobi lying before him, now hugging his legs instead of trying to pull them away. "Tobi, tell me, un!" Deidara begged, tears forming in his eyes all over again. _"No, it can't be, it's a lie. It has to be a lie!" _Deidara swung his head around to look at Zetsu again, golden hair swinging and fluttering in the breeze that had picked up.

Storm clouds had gathered.

"Zetsu!" Deidara took in a deep breath. "Where's Danna, un?" No response. Deidara scowled. "ZETSU! TELL ME RIGHT NOW, UN! WHERE THE FUCK IS DANNA?! WHERE IS MY SASORI!? TELL ME THIS FUCKING SECOND OR I SWEAR I'LL-" "Dead."

Deidara blinked, staring at Zetsu. He couldn't remember when things changed. He couldn't really remember having control of his body. He remembered shouting, swearing, threatening to blow him up if he joked like that. He couldn't remember how the words had spilled from his mouth, how they went from angry, to disbelieving to desperate and then to begging. When did he let go of Tobi, or stand up? He couldn't remember what he had done or how he had gotten there to that lonely broken up cave; perhaps he'd walked in a shell shocked trance. Had he become a zombie for almost half an hour? He was still bleeding, but he was no longer aware of the pain, he couldn't feel anything, he was numb.

He had walked with his head down, staring at the ground in shock, staggering. Tobi had constantly grabbed him, gripping him and keeping him from falling over, but he had stubbornly refused to be carried.

The cave was destroyed, battered, broken and there were weapons everywhere. His eyes focused on poisonous senbon needles everywhere and remains of iron sand scattered across the rocky ground. The Kazekage had been called out. Deidara lifted his head warily, looking over to see a smashed up and destroyed Hiruko. He walked over slowly, noticing the black sheet Sasori had covered himself in. He lifted the sheet with his foot. It was still intact, so Sasori had to have come out safely. _"Must have been forced out,"_ Deidara thought as he looked at Hiruko. _"His favourite puppet is smashed, there's no way this could have happened. Was Danna not careful enough? Or did he have to sacrifice it?"_ He frowned as he noticed the tail was smashed, the poison still dripping off it but in a horrible condition. Even Sandaime was in an awful state.

"The battle moved out there it seems," Zetsu spoke, pointing through a large opening that had been smashed into an exit. Deidara looked over to it, still dazed as he walked over to it. "Tobi, I will pick up pieces of Hiruko and Sandaime, you go be with Deidara," Zetsu said softly, watching Deidara try and stumble through the opening. "He's not stable." "Yes Zetsu-San," Tobi whispered, rushing off to the blonde who had now frozen.

Puppets. Everywhere. Hundreds, there had to at least be a hundred there! The numb shock had worn off to be replaced with a slap across the face from reality.

Tears flooded his eyes and his lip trembled. "A-Ah, n-no," he whispered, shaking his head as he began walking slowly, overturning puppets. "No, no, no, un." Tobi winced, looking down and away. He couldn't watch this. No.

This was the heart clenching pain of a lost lover.

The slow walk became a jog, and the job broke out into a full sprint as Deidara kicked puppets aside, roughly overturning them. He didn't know when he'd started crying, but tears were streaming down his face now. "No! No! NO!" His voice had become a scream now as he searched before spotting a puppet pinned to the wall. He darted to it. That was Sasori, his beautiful Sasori. He gently nuzzled its arm with his face, before noticing the chest was empty. The container was empty.

He let a maddened smile cross his face and he began to laugh. "I KNEW IT! HE'S NOT DEAD! MY SASORI ISN'T DEAD! THERE'S NO HEART CONTAINER! IT'S AROUND HERE SOMEWHERE! MY MASTER IS ALIVE! ALIVE!" He screeched, laughing hysterically, tears streaming down his face. "Deidara-Senpai, no, he's-" "SHUT UP TOBI! SHUT UP, UN! THERE'S NO HEART CONTAINER HERE! YOU'RE SO STUPID!" Deidara roared. Tobi winced, rubbing his arms gently as he watched Deidara laughing, looking around, bent over. "Where are you Danna~!? Come on! It's just me! It's you're Dei-kun! Where's your heart container~? Come on! We need to get home, un! I'm all dirty and hungry and sleepy, I need you to come and look after me! Look what I did to myself, un! My arm's torn clean off! Let's go home!" Deidara called as he kicked aside stray puppets, his search becoming desperate and mad grin slipping into a grimace of fear again.

"Deidara."

"Come on! I want to go home Danna! I want to go back home with you, un!"

"Deidara, he's over there."

Deidara looked up, straightening and looked at Tobi. He followed the gloved finger and started running in that direction, tears falling from his face and falling to the ground, flown off in the wind. "Danna? Danna!"

He froze. Three puppets. One long haired brunette, two red heads. Three in a loving embrace. Embrace of death. Deidara's mouth hung open; fear, sadness and pain swelled up into him all at once, knocking him off his feet as he fell to his knees in front of the centre puppet. The puppet with swords pierced through him.

"Sasori… no… Danna…"

Deidara let out a scream of anguish, collapsing onto the red haired puppet he'd fallen in love with, the one he'd given himself to, the one who had looked after him, his beloved; his soul mate.

"COME BACK TO ME!" Deidara screamed, tears streaming heavily down his cheeks as he sobbed, forcing his broken and crippled arm to move. Trembling and unsteady hands touched the red hair, stroking it softly as he screamed again in anger and loss. "DON'T LEAVE ME! DON'T GO! PLEASE! DON'T LEAVE ME HERE ALL BY MYSELF! I- I CAN'T GO ON WITHOUT YOU DANNA! PLEASE! DANNA! COME BACK TO ME! COME BACK!"

"_He's not here…"_

"Senpai…"

"_He's gone…"_

"Please, don't hurt yourself."

"_He's nowhere to be found…"_

"You're bleeding so much…"

Something cracked inside Deidara and he tore the blades out of Sasori's heart quickly, throwing them to the side, his arm now a bloodied and twisted mess, even so he pulled Sasori's limp body into a gentle embrace, sobbing uncontrollably. Tobi flinched, tears running down his own cheeks. _"Senpai, you're hurting… You're hurting so badly… You're bleeding… I can see your heart… It won't stop bleeding…"_ Tobi took a step forward, clenching his hands into fists as Deidara wailed in pain, face buried in Sasori's chest, the blood from the red head smearing the blonde's face and hair. _"Senpai, if your heart keeps bleeding like this… You'll die too."_

"NO! PLEASE! I ADMIT IT! SASORI! I ADMIT IT! ART IS ETERNAL! ART LASTS FOREVER! LIKE YOU! YOU'RE MEANT TO LAST FOREVER! SO PLEASE! PLEASE, UN! COME BACK TO ME! COME BACK AND BE WITH ME! LETS BE ETERNAL TOGETHER!" Deidara screamed, rocking back and forward, trembling violently. "ART IS ETERNAL! IT'S NOT FLEETING! I PROMISE NOT TO SAY IT AGAIN IF YOU COME BACK! I'LL BE ETERNAL WITH YOU! ART LIKE YOU LASTS FOREVER, UN!!"

Tobi turned his head away, crying as well. The pain was tearing at him and pulsing through the air, the dark clouds had thickened to black and were threatening to explode. They were leaking, but with a small push, they would explode, everything would come out and there would be no stopping it.

To lose a lover, the pain is unimaginable. It can hurt and tear you up so much inside, that you bleed forever, and eventually die. Didn't the day Sasori die signal the total annihilation of the world?

"_I will never be able to understand your pain Deidara."_

Raindrops fell to the ground quickly, echoing the sickening sadness.

"COME BACK TO ME SASORI! SASORI! I NEED YOU!"

"_What you're going through, I pray no one has to feel. I wouldn't curse this tormenting feeling of complete sorrow to even our worst enemies."_

"SASORI! I LOVE YOU! COME BACK! COME BACK TO ME!"

A thunderclap resonated through the area and the rain pelted the ground mercilessly as Deidara let out a hoarse scream.

"ART IS ETERNAL!"

* * *

**_Okay, I'm crying again. I really need to learn to get a grip on myself when re-reading my own work. God damn it! Where are the keys on this keyboard?! (I'll take over as Twisted not only is suffering a cold, but now post-baby syndrome where she sobs pathetically over small things. Twisted took a bit of a heavy blow to her self esteem a while ago and is trying to get a grip of herself to be reassured that she isn't as pathetic as some rather horrid people have been saying. This story is well typed, yeah? You want to see more of this story and other stories by her? If you want to see more, please, Review for her! Everyone who is reading this- YES! YOU! Drop in a review, let her know you're reading it! If only five people review, then she will think only five people are reading it and will dedicate her writing to those five. If ten people review, then she'll dedicate it to those ten. Come on! Show some love :33 If you want to see Chapter 19 and Chapter 20 of this story, REVIEW~!! We hate asking like this, but please, for the love of SasoDei, review please~?) Now who's the one sounding like a sob story? But still, reviews are beautiful and very lovely. Cheer me up and let me know I'm not typing this story meaninglessly. I know there's a few out there who are constant reviewers, much love goes to them!! But I know plenty have favourited this story and plenty have it under story alert, so more than just 5-8 people read it! I want my inbox FLOODED with emails saying I've gotten a review! That would make me so happy! Either way, tell me how this made you feel, what do you like about this chapter, hate anything, improve anything, do you like the story so far? Tell me~! Thank you all so much for reading, and even more love to those who review~! See you next Chapter :33 (Bye bye~! *Hugs*)_**


	19. Chapter 19

**_Well, it hasn't really been two weeks, but seems staying home sick can help typing stories (You're not meant to be on the computer when sick!) Fuck it, I've been either sleeping, eating, watching Anime or typing fanfics, I feel so damn lazy. (You're meant to rest! Computer screens aren't good for you!) On the contrary, it seems Yaoi and Anime has some magical healing power we don't know about. I'm recovering faster than either me, my parents or doctors expected (WTF!? EVERYONE! WHEN YOU'RE SICK- WATCH ANIME AND WRITE YAOI!!!!) I shouldn't be encouraging you, right? Ah, I'm feeling better, still mopy and all, but I cheered up a little, friends came to visit me and they showed some love which I needed. But while I was still moping in depression, I managed to finish up Chapter Nineteen. (Good, good! Tell us about that!) There's still depression, and quite a bit of it, but not super horrid like last Chapter, it's just evenly spaced. There's slight hints of TobiDei here as well, but only slight, nothing major. (SASODEI TRAITOR!) I'd love to thank EVERYONE who reviewed, and also a certain someone who's updating their stories nice and fast and is such a lovely person when it comes to reviews. (You know who you are~) Thank you to everyone, and enjoy Chapter Nineteen of I Choose My Life~!_**

* * *

_**Chapter Nineteen**_

For hours, Deidara lay sobbing. For hours he refused to move from his lover's deceased body, just lying in the rain which had started to flood into the small broken in area. It had already reached ankle height and became stained a bloody red. Nothing moved the broken blonde; no amount of force could budge him. He screamed in anguish for hours until his throat was raw, he cried until his eyes were red and puffy and he had become dehydrated, he clung to his lover even though his arm was searing in pain, he pleaded until he was repeating himself, he prayed until he ran out of gods, and even then the sorrow wouldn't leave him.

The pain wouldn't go away.

Tobi glanced up at the sky, standing. The rain had eased slightly. Looking down to where the blonde was he noticed the movements had slowed, almost stopped. "Zetsu-San-" "Go get him, I'll transport Sasori back." "Okay." Standing up, Tobi dropped the blanket from around his shoulders and jumped down, darting over to Deidara, Zetsu right behind him. Tobi's eyes softened and started watering. "He's still holding onto Sasori-Sama," Tobi said softly, kneeling down and gently touching Deidara's bloodied hand.

Zetsu shook his head. "Persistent brat," he mumbled softly as he bent down, starting to try and tug the puppet from Deidara's grip, "Even passed out from exhaustion he's stubborn." Finally managing to separate the two, Tobi carefully lifted Deidara in his arms, looking down at the once angelic smiling face. Tears still streamed across the tan cheeks, the dark eyelashes were sprinkled with tears and he was soaked from head to toe in not only rain, but blood as well.

Even though he had been here two days, those two days must have been a lifetime to him.

"_This must have taken years off his life,"_ Tobi thought sadly as he wrapped the blonde in the blanket and lifted him up, holding him bridal style. "He's lost heaps of weight, he's much too light right now," Tobi spoke as Zetsu sighed warily, placing Sasori over his shoulder. "I'll heal him once we get back. Konan must be worried by now, I told her it might be a while before we come back." Zetsu paused and started to form hand signs for his Earth Travelling Jutsu. He glanced over briefly to Tobi. "**I said that two days ago.**" Tobi winced and nodded, moving forward and placing a foot over Zetsu's so that he too could be transported through using Zetsu's Jutsu. "Let's go, I don't want Senpai to suddenly wake up and start thrashing and make it difficult for you," Tobi spoke, watching the blonde' face.

"Alright, we're off."

With that said, they slowly started to mould into the earth, sinking in and vanishing from sight, heading to the Akatsuki base.

* * *

"He's going to start spitting blood if he keeps screaming like that," Konan mused softly. "It can't be helped, he won't go back to sleep, even if we did drug him with some powerful sedative that Sasori-"

"NO!! GIVE HIM BACK! GIVE HIM BACK! MONSTER! MONSTERS! GIVE HIM BACK TO ME, UN!"

Konan winced and shot Pein a critical glare. "Don't say his name," she whispered as Pein frowned. "He has to get over it sometime soon," he spoke sternly, watching through the window attentively. Konan's eyes flickered back to watching Hidan struggling to keep Deidara down as Kakuzu attempted to stitch his arm back on. "It's not so easy, especially for Deidara," she said, licking her lips as Deidara let out another scream, kicking violently. "He was never mentally stable. I think _he_ was the only thing keeping Deidara together over the past few years." She took a deep breath, wringing her fingers nervously. "Now that's Sasori's gone-" she winced as Deidara screamed, sobbing loudly.

Zetsu rushed past them, crashing through the door, gripping a large needle filled with liquid. Pein looked down, swallowing. "I don't think we should save him." "What?!" Konan turned her head fast, blue hair swaying as she stared at Pein, eyes wide in disbelief. The ginger haired male licked his lips and sighed. "If he keeps acting like this, there's no point in saving him, we should let him die. Euthanasia, it's the merciful thing to do to a person with a shattered heart," Pein spoke.

Konan looked down, watching the drug slowly taking effect on Deidara. "But… Deidara…" She pursed her lips, frowning and closed her eyes as the screams slowly died down to just soft sobbing. Opening them again, she moved forward, pressing a hand gently to the glass and looked on into the room.

Kakuzu was panting harshly, half sitting on Deidara as Hidan lay wrapped around the blonde's legs, panting just as hard, a split lip with blood dribbling down his chin, and Zetsu moving away, gripping the now empty needle.

"Fuck," Hidan breathed, still gripping the blonde's legs just in case.

"D-Danna… I only want to be with you… Please… Take me away, un," Deidara breathed. Hidan's eyes softened and he let go of Deidara's legs, slowly moving up to sit by his head. "Is he finally fucking out of it?" Hidan asked as Zetsu shook his head. "This should have knocked him out, **the brat's probably just delusional now**," the plant man spoke, glancing down at the last few drops of the liquid. Perhaps he'd mistakenly taken the wrong one in his rush?

"H-Hidan, please, un."

The albino blinked, crimson eyes connecting with glazy grey-blue. "I want to die, un… You can sacrifice me to that Jashin god." His voice was hoarse and scratchy and was definitely lacking its usual bounce and happiness.

Hidan frowned and shook his head, gently stroking Deidara's hair, wiping some sweat from the blonde's forehead. "Sorry Deidara, but I can't." Deidara's eyes filled with tears again and he opened and closed his mouth a few times, choked sobs escaping him. "Y-You're betraying me, un!?" Hidan shook his head. "No, I'm saving you." "N-No! You're torturing me! T-Torture, un!" Deidara spoke, his voice breaking and heightening in pitch as he turned to Kakuzu, trying to reach out to him. "P-Please, Kakuzu, use your threads, un. Pierce my heart, you can have it, have Zetsu heal it, but you can have it. Oh, it's in so many pieces it hurts, but you can have it, un," Deidara whispered, trembling, desperately clinging to Kakuzu's hand. "Just carve this thing out of my chest and end this suffering, un!"

The stitched man stared at the blonde for a while before he closed his eyes and shook his head. "Your heart belongs in your chest, not mine, you need to live." "N-No I don't! My reason for living is gone, un! I don't need to live anymore! I have nothing left, nothing, un!"

A crashing sound came from the door and Zetsu, Kakuzu and Hidan whirled around, startled. Tobi stood with his hands trembling, head downturned, a tray of sweets on the floor- cookies, lollies and cake messed up together-, a blue cup shattered and hot chocolate splattered all over the ground.

"How… How cruel…"

Deidara blinked, turning his head on the side to look at the orange masked boy.

"That's… The worst thing Senpai could have ever said… Tobi didn't think Senpai was capable of being so cruel."

Tobi looked up, clenched his hands into fists. "'I'm only alive for one person, and when they're gone, I may as well die.' That's what you're saying, isn't it Senpai? Then what about the rest of us? Are we meaningless? Would you cry for us if we died? Or was Sasori-Sama the only one that mattered?"

Hidan frowned, staring at the masked boy. What was he saying? Deidara made a choking noise as Sasori's name was mentioned like that, screwing his eyes shut, but was still haunted by Sasori behind closed eyelids. Hidan bit his lip. "Oi, Tobi, drop it, let's go."

Tobi laughed softly, shaking his head. "No, this hurts. Senpai, what about us? We were there… We cared… We still do y'know? We were worried about you too, we took care of you, are we really that meaningless to you?"

Slowly opening his eyes, tears slowed down as Deidara watched Tobi blankly, seeing Sasori's face everywhere. Sasori and only Sasori. _"This hurts… It hurts!"_

"You really were only held together by Sasori-Sama's threads…" Tobi breathed and turned. "Tobi's sorry; Tobi will clean up his stupid mess and leave." He moved to the door, pushing it open. "Zetsu-San, can you help Tobi find the cleaning tools please?"

The plant man nodded, gesturing for Hidan and Kakuzu to follow. Slowly and one by one they left the room. Konan closed her eyes and turned away, following the small group with Pein's arm around her shoulder, leaving Deidara lying on the cold operating table. Alone.

Blue eyes flitted to the tray of broken sweets. The sweets Tobi must have spent hours making himself by hand. For him. He closed his eyes and turned his head away, the pain in his heart was really too much.

"_What am I supposed to do? My life is meaningless, my reason for living is gone, I don't know what to do anymore. I just want to die."_

Deidara blinked, eyes widening slightly, staring at the blank ceiling. He chose to live because of Sasori. Realisation hit him in an epiphany. He knew what to do.

He lay still on that cold operating table, alone, thinking.

"_There's only one thing left for me to do…"_

* * *

Tobi huffed, crunching sticks and twigs beneath his shoes. He placed his hands on a log and flipped a leg over it, huffing as he managed to crawl over it. "This is stupid, Itachi-Sama won't be pleased," he hummed loudly to himself.

"_Tobi! Get outta here, un!"_

Tobi frowned, shaking his head as he skipped along contently. "What did Senpai mean? Senpai has been very strange; Tobi can't figure you out at all." The masked boy paused and sighed, wringing his fingers as he started up a slow walk again. "Ever since Sasori-Sama's death…" Tobi looked up at the sky, eyebrows furrowing into a sad frown. "Hidan-Sama… Kakuzu-Sama… I… I don't know what to do anymore, why is it that you're all…" He blinked, biting his lip.

"Dead."

It hadn't been long after Sasori's death. Pein had commanded they continue with business as usual, perhaps then it would be easier to move on and forget. To better ease the grieving, or griever. Tobi had constantly gone to Deidara's room, bringing in trays of sweets, always his favourite, Deidara's favourite tea and some new interesting clay he'd bought at the market, some new paints, he'd even tried buying specially coloured clay.

Nothing.

Deidara would just stare blankly out of the window, sitting on the windowsill like he used to, arms resting on his knees.

But he'd recovered almost over-night. Less than a month later and Tobi admitted he still felt uneasy about it.

* * *

"_How are you doing Deidara?" The blonde looked up, blinking and gave a small shrug. "The usual, un." Konan looked down, taking a deep breath. She had to try again. "You know, you have to move on, you can't keep wallowing in this sorrow forever-" "You're right, Sasori no Danna wouldn't have wanted that, un." Konan looked up, shocked. Deidara turned his head, looking at her, blue-grey eyes staring emotionlessly at her._

"_Sasori no Danna once asked me what was most important to me… I answered it so easily, un. I need to stop this, he'd be heartbroken to see me so miserable, un," Deidara spoke._

_Tobi peeked around the corner, watching and gripping a small clay bird figurine close to his chest. Konan licked her lips, shocked, playing with her lip ring. She hadn't really anticipated Deidara would pull out of depression so quickly. Well, not quickly, but, faster than she thought he would._

"But there's something strange about Senpai…"_ His eyes, his face, his expression… Something was amiss. Konan at the time thought so too, but had dismissed it, smiling gently, eyes soft. "So, you want to live? That's… That's such a relief, I'm glad." _

_Deidara smiled, a haunted look remaining in his eyes and chilling his smile._

"_But of course, I will always choose my life."_

* * *

Tobi shivered, rubbing his arm as he frowned. Jumping down the gap in the ground he stopped, turning back to glance at the battlefield one more time. The last time he could see Deidara for a long time. "Tobi doesn't know what possessed Senpai to take interest in killing Orochimaru, or killing Sasuke for that matter, but whatever it is; Tobi hopes you're not just acting impulsively Senpai," Tobi said softly.

He closed his eye before turning, walking further.

"You've been acting so strange… You're not the Deidara that we loved… The Deidara that Sasori loved…" _"The Deidara I love." _

* * *

"_He's dead." "What?"_

_Deidara stood beside Tobi, looking down at the bloodied mess that had been stitched together again. "Kakuzu's dead, his hearts were destroyed and his body was taken by the Konoha Shinobi. He's dead Hidan."_

_The albino's eyes widened and tears streamed down his cheeks as his jaw dropped, shaking his head. "Fuck off! The dick head's immortal, like me!" Hidan said loudly. "Immortal things don't last forever, they too are fleeting, un," Deidara spoke softly. Hidan turned his glare to Deidara before it softened. "Th-That's not fair," Hidan whispered, shaking his head, silver strands falling out of place as he looked down at the stitching that almost always laced through his skin like silk threads. "But… They're not my Kakuzu's threads."_

_Hidan was the next to strike a low point. He stopped doing all of his sacrifices, Jashin no longer got hour long prayers to live a long eternal life, just hour long prayers to bring Kakuzu back or kill him. _

"_Dear Jashin, I'm half expecting him to come in and laugh, look at me and go 'Ya big fuckin' baby, cryin' over me. This is gonna cost ya!'" Hidan laughed, raising the glass to his lips, tears staining his pale cheeks as he took a long drink of the strong alcohol. Pein sighed. "It will feel like that, but you have to accept it. Kakuzu's gone. You're lucky we found you and dug you out," Pein spoke, taking a sip of the drink from a glass of his own. Hidan snorted. "Lucky? Fuck off pin-cushion," Hidan grumbled, staring blankly at the liquid, ritual knives spread out across the table, Kakuzu's calculator neatly placed away on a high shelf. _

_Pein sighed, shaking his head and stood. It was an empty battle trying to help those with lost loved ones. "Leave the bottle," Hidan grunted, cradling his empty glass in his hands. Pein blinked and nodded, placing the bottle of alcohol down, glancing at the albino who was eyeing his ritual blades._

"_It's a bad idea to leave you alone right now," Pein spoke softly. Hidan looked up at him and gave a dry smile, snorting. "Ha. You're a leader, not a faggot. You know what I'm about to do, don't you?" Pein nodded as he picked up the three bladed scythe, moving back to Hidan and held it out to him. "You were a worthy accomplice and a great friend. You will be missed," Pein spoke. Hidan smiled as he drank a few mouthfuls from the bottle. "Thanks," he spoke as he stood up, shaking hands with Pein, "You weren't all that fucking bad yourself Pin Cushion." "Oddly, I'll miss that." "Fuck off," Hidan chuckled, wiping his eyes as he took his beloved scythe from Pein and placed the bottle to his lips again. Finishing the bottle, Hidan gave a cocky, defiant smirk to his leader._

"_Later, Pein."_

_The pierced man walked out, shutting the door to Hidan's room, locking it from the outside, leaning against it heavily. He heard smashing of glass followed by a grunt and a satisfied sigh. There were some soft, happy whispers and then a heavy thump from behind the door. Pein shut his eyes tightly. _

_Member number three._

"_Goodbye Hidan." _

* * *

That had been a hard blow. Revealing this to the rest of the Akatsuki was hard. Konan too had started to crack and had cried a few times, gripping Pein's shoulder, but the man only became colder by the day, his Rinnegan eyes staring coldly into the future of his domination where there would be no more suffering, no more pain. Konan too had frozen over. Everyone was becoming steely and distant from each other.

"_What happened to our happy little family?"_ Tobi found himself thinking sadly.

Glancing ahead, Tobi started a light jog again. The past few months had been hard; it was a miracle Deidara didn't die or try to kill himself as well. He'd been on constant surveillance but not once did he attempt to kill himself.

Tobi was surprised yet quite proud.

Every time they would sit down to eat, they'd watch Deidara take the first few bites, watching how the blonde used his sharp cutlery, making sure he didn't suddenly twist the knife around and slice at his wrists or stab himself, but he would always give off his new creepy smile and tilt his head, and a lighting would fall on his face that gave him an evil look; like he knew something they all didn't. And he'd always whisper those comforting yet eerie words.

"_I chose my life."_

How had things changed so much? Hadn't Deidara been an adorable little baby just yesterday? Hadn't he practically sprinted over to the little blonde the second he'd heard Pein and Konan were home? The very second that Deidara was revealed, Tobi had adored him, wanted him for his own.

"Tch, damn," the masked boy scoffed, frowning.

But Sasori had gotten him first. He'd gotten Deidara instead. It was unfair. And growing up, all Deidara did was look to Sasori, cling to Sasori, want Sasori's approval. Sasori, Sasori, Sasori. Tobi couldn't deny he had been jealous of the red head, but he never wished for his death. That would make Deidara hurt, and he hadn't wanted that.

_

* * *

_

Deidara beamed, clinging to Sasori's arm, kissing the red head's cheek. "So, you're officially faggot and faggot?" "To put it in a crude way, yes," Sasori spoke softly, looking at the silver haired man who laughed, clapping Deidara on the back. "Nice pick kid, out of all the fucking guys out there, you choose Sasori," Hidan spoke with a grin as Kakuzu sighed.

"_Hidan, leave Deidara alone," the stitched man said, tugging at Hidan's arm. "Ahh~ No fucking fair 'Kuzu!" Hidan whined as he knelt down, looking at Deidara and smirking. "So, not fucking interested in others? Plenty of hotties in the village nearby," Hidan teased. Deidara shook his head, beaming happily. _

"_Of course not, I will always choose Danna, I live for him now, un~!" Deidara announced happily._

* * *

Tobi frowned, moving forward. So many times it was Sasori who was there. It was almost as if he'd forgotten them. Well, of course not forgotten, he remembered Deidara clinging to him too, he remembered sitting and eating candy with the blonde. Hell, he even remembered Hidan accidentally scaring Deidara when he was eight, and the little blonde had promptly ran into Tobi, petrified and said a ghost was after him. The two were found hour's later hiding in a closet by a confused Sasori. Tobi chuckled fondly at the memory. But the second Sasori had arrived; Deidara had detached himself from Tobi and jumped straight into Sasori's arms.

The blonde's reason for living.

Tobi froze; his eye wide in horror as his heart leapt out of his chest in a sudden realisation.

"_Hee-hee~ Danna's my life, un~ And I'll always choose him above anything!"_

The masked ninja's hands began to tremble and he whirled around, heart exploding in fear.

_That creepy smile. "I choose my life."_

"I-It can't be…" Tobi whispered as he turned, starting to run back the way he had came. Darting back desperately, trees clawed at his coat and his clothing, whipping out and trying to hold him back and slow him down, but he kept running.

"Senpai, you wouldn't!"

The trees had become a blur around the masked boy, the sky travelling slower than him, the earth spinning past beneath his feet, crunching noises echoing in the forest around him. Tobi was becoming desperate now, darting forward at an insane speed; he would need to do so as to retrace his steps in the short time he assumed he had left, he'd been walking, jogging and skipping for hours, he'd lost track of time. How far away was he? He couldn't tell.

He felt a pulse surging in the area and his sprinting quickened, desperate to reach Deidara.

"_I'm sorry Tobi…"_

"S-Senpai!"

Branches attacked him from every direction, slowing him but not stopping him. He batted them away, kicking obstacles out from his feet, pushing every muscle until it was straining. He clambered up the hill and little chasm he'd jumped down, reaching the edge of the cliff only to be hit by a heavy wave of heat.

"S-SENPAI NO!" Tobi screamed as he felt a stronger heat wave hit him; chakra was being sucked in and concentrated on in one small area.

Tears streamed down Tobi's face and he tore his orange mask off, staring wide eyed at the extravagant fireball that exploded, shockwaves crashing through the area and sending him flying backwards onto the ground with a shout.

He covered his head with his arms, landing with a heavy thud on the ground, heavy blasts hitting the area over and over, pulsating until it slowed to a stop what felt like an eternity later. Tobi lifted his head up, trembling, bottom lip quivering as he pushed himself up, looking around, eyes wide. "S-Senpai?" Looking around, he grabbed his mask, standing as he crawled up the chasm again slowly, peeking over the edge. "Not you too Senpai!" He wailed sadly, tears streaming down his cheeks.

"Senpai, you can't be dead too!"

There was no more forest left, the explosion had stopped just metres away from where he had fallen, stopping him from being cooked by the explosion's heat, a clear burn mark surrounding a ten kilometre radius.

"Senpai!!"

Tobi threw his mask to the ground, collapsing and screaming.

"DEIDARA!"

* * *

_It's all black and white now… There's nothing but space… Pure space… Thank god… I can finally die. Why does the night turn into day? How can people laugh so freely? I was told that everyone was important, and that everyone was needed to keep the world turning… That was all…_

_One big lie…_

_No one is needed… Not to keep the world turning… With or without us, it will keep turning. Night will turn to day, and day to night without disturbance. Rain will fall, and the sun will shine whether we exist or not. But… That's all so very sad… _

"Deidara…"

_That's why you need someone beside you… Friends, parents, lovers… So why is it, that even in death, it feels so… Lonely?_

"You're gone…"

* * *

**_THIS IS NOT THE END OF THE STORY! (Thank god!) I had a few people worried last Chapter was, but no, CHAPTER TWENTY WILL BE THE END. And you know what? It's already typed up and finished, ready to be posted! ( :D ) But I want to see how badly you want it. I'd love, if possible, to get FIFTEEN REVIEWS for this Chapter, and I guarentee the second I get number 15, I will post up Chapter Twenty, which could literally be in a few days, but, if it takes longer, you might be waiting weeks. (Now you're being mean Twisted~ Say "Please" to the lovely reviewers!) Of course, I do feel horrible demanding them, especially from some I know will review without being asked, but I'd love to see if I can get a bigger number. (You're becoming a Review whore Twisted) I swear I'm not, apologies if I sound mean. Well, about I Choose My Life Chapter Nineteen, this was written mainly so we pretty much followed Tobi around, but, it was a bit easier, hope it wasn't too confusing. I tried to cover quite a few things, but I don't think I did that well enough... If you need anything cleared up, feel free to ask~ :D Thank you ALL for reading, and reviewing, and I hope to give you the next Chapter nice and fast~ (Bye bee~ :D ) See you at the Finale~_**


	20. Chapter 20

_**Welcome to the finale. (Chapter Twenty. The End T.T) Wow, I can't express the joy I feel arriving at this chapter at last after so many months in the making. This has been such a pleasure to write and I'm so glad that so many people enjoyed it. Over 90 Reviews right now! Alright, I seriously wasn't expecting that when I started I Choose My Life, I really wasn't, I barely expected 30. Yet here we are. Thank you all so very much! If you liked this story, then keep an eye out for others, I'm in the process of writing and planning more which hopefully will be as good, if not better than I Choose My Life. Go to my Profile, down the bottom will be updates on stories in progress or ones I'm planning, hopefully you will find at least one in the making over there :3 So far we have another SasoDei and possibly an ItaDei and a few SasoDei One-Shot in progress, go give them a read when they're available! *Shameless self advertising* Give them some nice reviews like you have done with this story. (And don't forget to review this Chapter too!) I'd like to thank everyone who read this story, who reviewed, who favourited it or even me (Aww, you're too kind!), it makes me very happy X3 *Wiggles* Of course, as promised, here is the Finale of I Choose My Life; Chapter Twenty. (Please enjoy and thank you for reading~ :3)**_

* * *

_**Chapter Twenty**_

"_Unnn, it's so warm here…"_

Blonde hair pooled around his shoulders, slipping over milky skin and falling to the ground. A small smile curled onto the soft lips of the male and he shifted, making his arm more comfortable as a pillow.

"_It's so nice and soft…"_

Curling his toes lazily, he moved his foot, gently rubbing it against his leg, his fingers tracing patterns on the smooth yet warm ground.

"_I like this place… This place where it doesn't hurt…"_

The smile became brighter but then froze, vanishing all at once. Azure blue eyes opened, dark eyelashes blinking a few times before the eyes softened and lowered. "Am I… Dead, un?" Pushing himself up slowly, he looked around. White space. He was surrounded by white. Absolutely nothing but white. It was luxuriously warm and soft, he felt no more pain, he wasn't hungry, or thirsty, and his wounds… He blinked, pushing the sleeves up of the long white robe, glancing at his arm and smiled softly.

"_No scars," _he thought with a smile. His arms were healed. He checked the other arm, glad to find the same result. No ugly scarring, stitching or burns. Reaching up, he pushed the blond fringe away, gingerly feeling his eye and around it. No scope. No contact. His eye was healed, like there had never been a scar, like that horrible incident had never happened, like…

"I dreamt living, un?"

But then… He looked down at the ground, curling his legs up underneath himself. "I'm dead, and I'm…" He choked on tears, lip trembling. "I'm alone again, un…"

"Of course not, my beautiful brat."

Snapping his head up, he turned, gazing up at the face he'd been craving for what felt like an eternity. Red hair gently floating around his pale face, muddy brown eyes gazing down at him and a smile tipping his soft lips, hands outstretched for him.

"Sasori no Danna, un?"

The puppet master's smile brightened and he bent down, brushing the tears away from the younger one's milky cheeks. "It's good to see you again… Deidara…"

Deidara choked on his tears, gripping Sasori's hand and pulled himself up, but only to retreat from him. "You're dead Danna!" he shouted, eyebrows knitted upwards in fear and confusion. Sasori nodded. "A-And I…" Deidara felt his chest. "Committed suicide, that wasn't the smartest thing I've seen you do, brat," Sasori spoke softly, smiling. Deidara blinked, shock washing over his face. "I-I'm dead… For real, un?" he whispered. "I died in my art?"

Sasori chuckled. "I wouldn't call it art; art is eternal after all," he spoke. Deidara scoffed, pulling a face. "Is not. Art is fleeting, un," he rebutted. "Eternal," Sasori replied. "Fleeting." "Eternal." "Fleeting, un!"

Sasori chuckled again. "Art is eternal, like us. Like our love, or did I misunderstand what you screamed over my body not too long ago?" Sasori asked with a teasing smile. Deidara blushed ten shades of red, crossing his arms over his chest as he pouted and looked away at the whiteness which was now becoming distinguished, shaping into soft fluffy clouds.

"I was very distressed, un." "I could see, I just wasn't sure why." "You'd died!" "I never left you." "What was I supposed to do, un?" "Live." Deidara blinked, frowning at Sasori. "How could I, un? That's horrible to tell me. Live… Without you, un… Humph! I'm glad I'm dead," Deidara spoke with a frown, shifting about on his feet, looking over at Sasori.

The puppet master smiled, holding out his arms.

"Well, weren't you practically begging to touch me again, and here you haven't given your dear master a hug yet."

Deidara's face softened and he smiled happily, moving swiftly and covering the distance easily. _"I swear I'm floating, I'm so happy," _he thought, jumping up, arms outstretched as he landed gently in Sasori's awaiting arms. Burying his face in Sasori's neck, Deidara didn't care his feet were no longer touching the ground; he knew he was flying using wings of joy and love. He wrapped his arms tightly around Sasori, sighing in happiness when Sasori's arms wrapped around his slim waist, keeping them close, bodies pressed against each other.

"Deidara… I'm so happy to be with you," Sasori spoke softly, breathing in Deidara's scent.

Deidara smiled, lifting his head up, looking Sasori in the eyes happily. "I haven't been happier in ages, un," he said with a smile, leaning up and brushing his lips against Sasori's. He felt sparks ignited and he quickly pressed their lips together in a proper kiss, fingers gently running through red hair.

"_We'll stay like this together… For all eternity… Nothing will take us apart ever again."_

Gently pulling apart from their kiss, Deidara beamed and Sasori wiped away the final tears from the blonde's blue eyes. "You can stop crying now, we're together aren't we?" Sasori spoke as Deidara chuckled, nodding. "Yeah, but it seems that stupid ol' me can't seem to stop, un… I'm just too happy."

"_Together for eternity."_

"Our love… Our souls, we'll always be together," Deidara whispered, gripping Sasori's white robe tightly. "Of course, for all eternity," Sasori replied softly, stroking Deidara's cheek. Deidara smiled, laughing gently. "You know what I think Danna, un?" The red head blinked, looking down at Deidara. "What's that Deidara?" he asked, watching the soft skin glow in the light of the sun. "Above everything, I will always choose you Danna, un," Deidara whispered, smiling softly as he closed his eyes, holding Sasori tightly.

"I will always choose my life."

* * *

**_The End_**

* * *


End file.
